Funny Jokes

What an evasive answer. I want to know if you have been the parent of a child who has been terminally or chronically ill. That is a yes or no answer. What is subjective about that? Do you have kids or not? Did you have sick siblings as a child or not? If you answer with "I've pretty much been...." then you are a coward and a pretentious idiot-fuck. Answer the fucking question. I find your answer pretty condescending to the Robbins's situation, and it really struck me raw. If you can't empathize, you can't. Just say that it sounds terrible. Don't say that you have "a pretty good idea" and that it is "subjective." Would you tell J. that you know how it is?You didn't reflect at all with sympathy; you directed the attention back to yourself. I'm just curious if you are pathological or if you have a story. That's why when I was wrestling half my training regimen was spent strengthening my sphincter muscles. One of the better excercises was sticking a roll of quarters up my ass, then I would slowly and deliberately push it back out. I got so good at this the guys would hand me a dollar after practice, asking for change for the soda machine. The first time this was meant to be a joke but when my muscles became so refined that I could give the change to them one quarter at a time, the joke was on them.The end result was that I became strong enough to lock-in my opponents finger(s) when he tried to check my oil, thereby incapacitating half of his mobility and strength. I can't tell you how many reversal points I scored off this, but it was worth at least two every match. I was at the mall today buying some yugioh cards (tryin' to complete my CDIP set) & this kid standing next to me in line at the game shop says "Man, that yugiHO s**t is homo, you shouldn't be wasting your faggot cash on some lame fucking s**t crap like that. Fuckin' cocksucker." I turned around, saw no one, then peered down at a child who looked about 10 years old holding many packs of Pokemon Unseen Forces.I then got into a debate (for what seemed like 30 minutes or so) on the superiority of Yugioh to poke'mon. And at the end he just called me a "fag" and proceeded to punch my in the stomach. I finally crawled on my bruised stomach to a nearby mall cop, and pointed to that snot nosed brat, last I saw of him he was on the mall cops shoulder cying for his mother. i'm sick and tired of people thinking being ugly is just "how god made you"!!! Here's two prime examples of how this statement is false, please feel free to add yer own. :PHow one gets fat: eating WAY too fucking much[or] they are genetically HUGE [lol only in very few cases]>>Conclusion: lol, fat=no self control to stop fucking eating; no self control=not very attractive; fat=not pretty.How one gets acne: oily icky gross dirty skin that isn't washed and has dead skin clogging pores[or] genetically gross [lol, in some cases, yet they can be 'fixed' so it's still no excuse]>>>Conclusion: lol, wash yur fucking face! acne=no self responsibity to wash yur fucking face!; no responsibility=lol not very attractive; acne=not prettyTHUS, /end rant, but yes, people who don't have the self control to be at a reasonable weight are icky icky gross, and dirty people ho don't wash, lol ew, yea, gross. Anime isn't just a bunch of cheap American ripoffs of cartoons, it's art. Next time you American sheeple are watching your simpsons or south park or whatever mindless American cartoons that have plots, storylines and comedy, I'll be Admiring the wonderful and superior art of Chinese cartoons. oh and to people who are worried about games looking childish its usually a good indication that your a just a kid who thinks he's grown up cause he can shoot hookers in GTA There is very little of value in blogging. There are some real journalists who have an online newsletter, and real writers who post articles independently -- that they happen to be classified as blogs flatters the sycophantic self-indulgent blogosphere at large. Imagine if you serialized your blog and emailed all your friends with it every time you updated it? If they wouldn't welcome such a diary, don't bother with your blog. The people who care are the people no one cares about. The problem is all bloggers have a following -- other bloggers. Should we allow every member of NAMBLA his own page on Wikipedia because he has a few dozen acquaintances at NAMBLA? No. Nearly all bloggers who are nothing but should be eliminated from Wikipedia. Published journalists and legitimate authors who happened to be classified as "bloggers" are welcome, of course. I'm not trying to brag or anything, but yeah, I smoke weed. I don't give a damn what anyone says regarding marijuana laws. Go ahead, trace my ip. Tell the cops where I live, I should be able to put whatever i want in my body, may it be marijuana, a 10 year olds childs semi erect penis, or cocaine. The government doesn't have any right telling us what is "ok" to consume. I asked my friend for a sip of his pepsi and he gave me the can. Afterward he accused me of 'nigger lipping' his pepsi and refused to take it back. In a rage, I filed a hate crime report with the NYPD and had his racist ass hauled off to juvee where I'm sure disgusting faggots are anally violating him even as I type these words. I abhor bigots. Oh great another holiday for christians to force their believes on me. Christmas is just another day for us atheists, i'll be listening to atheist radio and maybe watch a little tv. I'll let the brainwashed Christians have "cheer and good fun". Once, when i was changing my little brother's diaper, i jacked him off. I don't know what drove me to do it, but I did. now i can't stop thinking about his little penis. I think i want him to grow up and fuck me. How could Sony betray me like this?!? I waited in line for three months--yes, I started the very first line for the PS3 way before anyone else. I endured the elements, the snide comments, and unemployment (I was fired from my job after the first week) because I wanted to be the very first person to play what I imagined would be the salvation to all my dearest dreams. Rumor had it that playing a videogame on the PS3 would be like injecting heroin directly into your eyeball. I believed the hype and worshipped Sony as my god.Finally, with nearly every credit card maxed out and two debt consolidation plans under my belt, the great day arrived and I fought my way into the store to get my hands on this wonder console. Leaving the store I did a little victory dance and then drove up and down the parking lot taunting those who did not get a PS3. Then it was off to home to play this little beauty.I hooked everything up while my wife and children watched and applauded at my direction. It was time to play the first game! After two hours I noticed that waves of heat were pouring off the console, so I told my daughter to hold it up in the air in front of a fan while I continued playing, waiting for the opiate-like ecstasy that was soon to overwhelm me after I shot to death another video game enemy. Things went fine for awhile; an hour later the box began whistling and my daughter complained that it was getting too hot to hold. I figured this was just what they called "burning in" and continued playing.Then, at the four hour mark, my daughter began complaining of blisters and within fifteen minutes the entire console burst into flames, the plastic casing scorching and bubbling as I rushed to complete the level. But I was too late, and my precious daughter burned to death. Wracked with sadness at not being able to save my game, I immediately called my lawyer to review my options for a massive lawsuit.I am sure we all expected a few "bugs" and "glitches" and "inconveniences", but that does not excuse Sony for selling what appears to be a blazing DEATH TRAP.Caveat emptor! Nigger? So you think you are superior not only because you're white! it's because you read! ha! I didn't know they were people like you in this website, and I hope you learn more about our people, because I'm very ofended now. Racism is illegal, you know? if they were enough technologies to know who is behind that "anonymus", no doubt you would be behind bars now! Please respect others, even if they don't like reading like you do. I m a hindu religious girl. I don't when i got the habit of masturbation.Now i feeling guilty.?I have always wear panty while doing it. use pillow to masturbate.I think some white discharge is there when i do this.doesn't know whether pillow became wet or not. I have left this habit when i came to know that it is not good. my problem is now i think if anybody touches those pillow he or she will become impure. similar is the with the things whom i used to touch that time.what to do.I m getting mad. how to solve this issue.I promise not to masturbate again. I cannot wash them all.Plz HELP AS SOON AS POSSIBLE. mAY gOD BLESS U ALL a rabbi told me the other day the deffinitive prove to demon's existance. you have to get a black female cat (daughter of a black cat), kill it and burn it. put your bed in the middle of your room so that it's not touching any walls, and then spread the ash in a circle surrounding it. sleep there. the next day if you're still alive you will see the marks of demon's feet: they'll look like hen claws. and that's it, I really talked to a rabbi asking him to prove his wonderful religion and this is the best he could come with (it is written on the guemara wich is like the torah i think). You can spot a Nintendo 64 game from a mile away. If the textures look like they were photographed with a cell phone camera, copied to VHS tape, copied to another VHS tape, imported into the computer and saved as a low quality JPEG, and then the computer was chucked into a fire, you know you're playing a Nintendo 64 game. I am sick to death of the ludicrous anti-Nintendo ravings of you pissed-off geeks. Do you really believe the rest of us don't see right through your mental pathology? Your entire conosole philosophy boils down to this: "The cool kids picked on me in high school, and I can't get over it. I hate the Wii" girl you must be the aeon flux movie because i never wanna see you again IM SO SICK AND TIRED OF CHRISTIANS PUSHING THEIR BELIEFS ON ME, i mean every year i go to buy something at the store and I see HAPPY HOLLIDAYS and it pisses me off so muchhh i mean christians are everywhere i mean its like UHHGGGGG but anyway this year its gonna be different. i just got down purchasing my ANTI-god pin. im going to every place where they sell christmas trees and all the "happy" (yeah more like BRAINWASHED) familys will see my anti-god pin and i will silently protest this stupid holliday yeah go atheists! Tokyo is a great country. I have been there. Its provinces (shinagawa, shinjuku, roppongi) are incredibly vast and there is an inter-provincial high speed train that links them all! The best part is that the train also allows you to travel to neighboring countries, for example if you wanted to visit the country of Osaka you could do so because they use the same currency. Amazing, isn't it? I wish Canada would use the same dollars that the US does. Now disguised fully as some sort of shabbily dressed derelict, I quickly made off with my shopping cart and ran full tilt back to the park. With no hesitation I dug through the trash barrel I'd found earlier, seizing every last can and bottle from the fetid depths of the garbage. I was almost deterred when my hand plunged into a soiled diaper, obviously unimproved from the three days of rain we'd received prior, but I had my eyes on the prize. I rolled my cart down the paths of the park, past the lemmings of our society as they strolled idly past jackpot after jackpot, lacking sense and ambition enough to loot them for their own benefit. Many of them could not contain their envy, looking at me with disgusted jealousy as I filled my cart with money. One phenomenon I cannot explain: a Catholic nun handed me a one dollar bill and told me I could get a free meal at St. Joseph's parish every Sunday afternoon. I took the cash, obviously, and thanked her for the tip on the new scam. I figure they must make you sign up for some shit before you get the free food, and that the nun must get a kickback for every new signup. Slick setup, but I'll just keep the buck, Sister Sucker!When I thought I'd plucked the final gem from this treasure chest, I slowly paced my way towards the most convenient road out of the park. I passed by a man drinking from a brown paper bag. I wasn't born yesterday, so I knew that he had a bottle in it (and probably not Chocolate Yoohoo if you get my drift). I tried to look very patient and unassuming while I waited for him to finish his bottle and discard it, so that I might add it to my coffers. After ten or so minutes he did something shocking and unexpected: he walked into a nearby Port-A-Potty and took the bottle in with him. Seven minutes later, exactly, he re-emerged without his bottle. The disgusting truth was obvious, he had finished his bottle while on the latrine and tossed the empty down into the hole. I nearly wrote that one off as a loss, but then my inner puppet spoke once again, chiding me for the sheer Hagginsian nature of my hesistation. Suffice to say, I was shoulder deep in shit before I even had time to regret my moment of weakness. Was the resulting bottle of Olde English 800 Malt Liquor worth the effort? You bet your ass, buddy.Alright, so even the faithful are probably getting impatient by now. I'm sure you want to know what my take was after all that time and effort and both occassions of having a limb thrust into fecal matter. Let's just say that Andrew Jackson and I have a dinner date tonight (though I'll only be needing his vagrant friend Alexander Hamilton once I apply my coupon). On second thought, Kroger's has On-Cor Salisbury Steaks for 2.50, and I have a manufacturer's coupon which I attained by lying to their customer care line. In case you're wondering, saying you found a condom in your chicken parmesan is only worth a dollar off your next purchase. girl you must be a playground slide because i want to go down on you repeatedly Honestly, I'd like to hear some commentary from someone who hasn't been caught trying to suck their own dick. YEAH RIGHT SO I STRAIGHT STABBED SOME PROSTITUTE WITH A FORK. IT AINT NOTHIN THOUGH NAWMEAN. BITCH ASS JUDGE HIT ME WITH 3 YEARS OF PROBATION AND 80 HOURS OF COMMUNITY SERVICE. 80 HOURS? NIGGA I BENCHPRESS 80 HOURS. NIGGAS THINK I AINT GONNA WILD OUT AND FORK SOMEONE ELSE CUZ I'M ON PAROLE SO I'M JUST LAUGHIN YO. I LAUGH AT THESE ACTORS. FUCKIN P.O THINKING I AINT GON COME IN HIGH AS SHIT OFF THE TREES JUST BECAUSE I GOT PEE IN A CUP. I DO THAT AND THROW IT IN A NIGGA'S FACE. PUNK LOOKIN OFFENDED AND SHIT I'M JUST LIKE DAMN SON, YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO BE COVERED IN MY URINE. FAGGOT DON'T KNOW WHERE MY DICK'S BEEN. IT AINT NOTHIN TO A G LIKE ME NAWMEAN In the 1960s, a student at Harvard Law School addressed the parents and alumni with these words:The streets of our country are in turmoil. The universities are filled with students rebelling and rioting. Communists are seeking to destroy our country. Russia is threatening us with her might. And the republic is in danger. Yes! danger from within and without. We need law and order! Without law and order our nation cannot survive.There was prolonged applause. When the applause died down, the student quietly told his listeners: "These word were spoken in 1932 by Adolf Hitler." Hmm, are you implying that people with long hair are gay? That's pretty hilarious if so, seeing as how most gay people have basic short hair. I am a BIG FAT GAY VAMPIRE in the BOSTON AREA. What I am looking for is other QUEER VAMPIRES to be GAY with and to DRINK BLOOD out of foofy martini glasses and maybe to use it as ingredients in a cosmopolitan. OR MAYBE ONE OF THOSE DRINKS WITH ALL THE UMBRELLAS AND THINGS. Then we will go DISCO DANCING to HOT DISCO TRACKS and talk about how TOTALLY AWESOME Madonna is. I guess after doing that we will have to get a PLATE OF NACHOS or something EQUALLY FATTENING and then stuff them into our BIG FAT GAY FACES. The nachos should have SOUR CREAM on them because that is the best way to eat them. I am looking for someone who will let me DRINK THEIR QUEER BLOOD. In addition to being QUEER you must also be FAT, this is very important. Ideally I would also get fatter from drinking your STUPID CHUBBY GAY BLOOD. You can drink mine too but only if I get to wear your GAY UNDERWEAR on my head while you do. hey gurl what kind of sex locations you into? im all about the dorm room/hotel room/dark corner/men's bathroom/janitor's closet/parent's bedroom/kindergarten classroom/bus shelter/deserted corner of the park/arby's While many parents are digging deep and forgoing luxuries in order to buy their children the newest videogame console, I've decided to build my own interactive entertainment device for my children. It's a desk with a copy of the holy bible on it. I call it the "Praystation 3" girl you must be a rodeo bull because i want to ride you for 8 seconds and then get off Keep at it! I'm sure someday you'll be mentioned in a blog. girl, you must be rearden metal because i'd like to run a train on you. windows genuine advantage, created so geeks have a genuine advantage when it comes to getting in a womans pants. Masterminded by Bill Gates who wanted to give something back to the community. He devised a plot which would force women to speak to lowly geeks world wide shut the fuk up bitch u get a lyf dumass ur a fkn hipacrit u sed to keep shyt to urself well u didnt do that n ur lyk aw get over it well u fkn get over it 2 then dont go fkn ritin shyt lyk u sed fkn looza I admit, I love the natural smells of a man. Nothing turns me on more. A healthy funk in a mans armpit or a working-mans sweaty balls are like nothing else to me. They are easily more effective than poppers, legal and dont give me a headache. Speaking of armpits, I dont like deodorant either, mostly because it tastes so terrible. When I was in 7th grade my Social Studies teacher asked me what my favorite system of government was. Luckily I was wearing my Anti-Flag tee that day. I cracked my knuckles and reclined in my desk and replied cooly, "Anarchy." Linux Is your wife, I swear. I stride nude in your computer room ; yet you dont care. Transfixed with penguins on the screen. This Open Source makes me scream. Im tossing your computer in the trash. RMS is whose genitals you tongue lash. Enemy of Our Freedom you say? I dont care. You're just gay. Yes I too fell victim to internet cruelty. Only in my case it was IRC abuse. To make a long story short I was willing to do anything to get +V and some 'people' took advantage of that. Roll Playing (RP) turns into real life tragedies and Real people get hurt or die. If you want to RP why not try to Roll Play real life situations such as how to pay the electric bill, house payment, and car payment, insurance and so on. Roll Play your parents working hard to give you a better education and life. Yesterday after coming home from an extremely long, stressful day of work, I plopped down on the couch to relax for a bit. Laying in front of the TV is great, but an orgasm would really help me blow off some steam. Lucky for me, I had recently purchased a rabbit, so I retrieved that from my bedroom, returned to the couch, and brought up some gay porn on my laptop(side rant-- will someone please make porn tailored to women?) Just as I was beginning to get that tingling feeling that happens before I come, I heard the sound of someone trying to unlock the door to my apartment. WHATTHEFUCKISTHIS!? Shit! I am naked from the waist down holding a loud-ass vibrator standing in front of a laptop on which a man is moaning loudly and telling another man how he wants him to "put it in my ass!" SHIT! WHO THE FUCK IS COMING IN THE DOOR RIGHT NOW?I completely panic. My shaking hands try desperately to turn the vibrator off, but in my excited state I completely forget how to do it..there are so many buttons!! why did I buy the fancy model??? I rip the batteries out of the stupid thing after fumbling with it and wasting precious seconds. I throw everything in the closet of my bedroom, close the door, and start to look for some pants. Then I remember that gay porn is still being played loudly on my couch. FUCK! FUCK! FUCK! I could hear the sound of the second lock unlocking. I dash back into the livingroom and try with my again shaking hands to at least turn the volume down. The door is opening at this point so I snatch the laptop and scurry half-nakedly back to my bedroom while depressing the volume button. Unfortuately, I hit the wrong side of the volume button and deafeningly loud moans are now emanating from my bedroom--gay men moans. Shit! People are in my living room now. I yell "ONE MOMENT!!!!" as loud as I can, trying to try to drown the sounds of Brad getting slammed in the ass. In a complete state of terror I make the unwise decision of throwing the laptop as far under my bed as I can, hoping that the boxspring and mattress would be enough to muffle the sound of my laptop at full volume. Sadly, it was not. People are milling about in the apartment now, so I grab some shorts from my bureau and emerge from my bedroom to greet the realtor and prospective new tenants in a dress shirt and shorts, flushed, and visibly shaken. I introduce myself over the sounds of an apparent orgy in my bedroom to a profusely apologizing realtor and a smirking couple. I summoned as much dignity as I could, smiled devilishly, and returned to the fake orgy in my bedroom as they showed themselves out. I like to put excessively large ammounts of Vaseline on my cock and fuck empty toilet paper rolls. I think my parents are starting to notice that we're running out of Vaseline every 4 days or so. One time I was performing anal sex on my best friends dog like I always did on the weekends, but this most recent time I must of thrusted too hard and I think I damaged the internals of the labrador. It then got a horrible hernia and soon died after my friend was attempting to coax it back to life. It felt great. i just took a shit and my toilet didn't really flush, i got pretty frustrated and now im going to masturbate to internet porn galleries. Good day to you. I bought this book to teach my child about her body, and I was excited about the opportunity to bond with her in this fashion. However, little did I know about all of the pictures of nude women in this book. The almost 'erotic' quality of these photos were not for children! Then when we got to the parts that involved naked men, I shut the book. She didn't need to see those pictures. Later, when she was asleep - I looked at the book alone and found unbelievable pictures of naked men and women performing the strangest acts on each other with pieces of fruit and a vacuum cleaner! What is my child going to learn from this? How to be a Kuma Sutra expert? No, thanks. She gets plenty of that from her father. you walk in( the door will be open for you) you come to my bedrom where porn will be begin to suck this big black damn small talk...just walk in and start sucking........i cum on your face and then you can leave or then when can have small ready.....i dont want a lot of emails back and forth..just let me know if your ready for a address..... gurl what design patterns u into? i'm into: bridge / command / interpreter / prototype / flyweight / strategy / builder / abstract factory / proxy / facade / composite / chain of responsibility / decorator / adapter / factory method / observer / memento / template method / visitor / iterator / mediator / state / singleton i keep baking fucking cakes. this pink wig tart keeps me up nights and since i can't jack off any more since the operation i just keep fucking making cakes. everyone at the office thinks that i'm some sort of faggot becuase i bring in cakes every day. they're all fat forty-five year old tits-sagging-to-the-floor soccer moms and if they knew that cake-baking was my masturbatory substitute they probably wouldn't even eat them. probably also if they knew i pissed in the cake mix. did you guys hear on the news? usually i don't watch the news, i just heard my friend's brother freaking out about it. it's on right now. North Korea shot a three missiles at Japan, but MISSED!! XD what would happen if they didn't miss?? one of them was aimed for America, too. It's on Fox News right now. THey're talking about shooting back at Korea. STUPID KOREA! dude, manhwa vs manga. XD awesome.what if they actually didn't miss?? what would happen to everyone's favorite mangas and animes. i pray to God this isn't the end of humanity. Wait, i don't care if humanity ends. Humanity sucks. I just don't want JAPAN TO END! or the world. i haven't even had a chance to glomp Inuyasha. I DON'T HAVE PROBLEMS!!!! :ninja: The first step is to heat 3 or 4 hot dogs to body temperature. Don't make them too hot or it won't work -- about 30 seconds will do. When they're done, stick all the hot dogs into a condom. Lube your penis and slide it into the middle of the hot dogs, so they're surrounding your penis. Then pump the entire package. And don't worry, the condom won't break. Hey /b/, I have a very serious problem. I'm fucking crying because of how stupid I am.Okay, so my girlfriend was supposed to come over to my house today because I was going to go take her to a movie. She lives about 20 minutes away, and the movie we were supposed to see started at 4:15, which was in about 40 minutes. I figured "cool, I'll just play Pokemon while I wait".So I'm playing Pokemon, and having a pretty damn good time. Anyway, she finally does show up, except she's crying as she walks into my room. Instead of doing the right thing by comforting her, I half-focus on my game and her. She starts telling me her cat died, and just as she was getting into it, I get into a random encounter in my game.A shiny pidgey. Holy shit. (For those of you who don't know/care, shiny pokemon have less than a 1/1000 chance of appearing). I stare into my screen in amazement, yelling "holy shit, YES", interrupting her mid-story. She sobs more, and she starts to yell "You don't even fucking care! YOU JUST WANT TO PLAY YOUR FUCKING GAME!" I'm still looking at my screen, still focusing on catching my shiny pidgey, when she walks over, and tosses the game against the wall. I run over and pick up my DS hoping that nothing has changed on screen, and quickly noticed that she broke it. My system and my shiny pidgey, gone forever.I start screaming every obsenity I know, and started flailing my arms around. I didn't know she was behind me, and appearantly I backhanded her in the face while I was being a dumbass and swinging my fists around. She yells out "FUCK YOU", and runs out of my house in tears.What have I done? I've fucked up so badly, and I need to know how to approach her. I don't want a game of Pokemon to be respoinsible for ruining my best relationship ever. Help me /b/. Over the years, the bathrooms at the Church have fallen into ill repair and we decided to completely replace them with more conveniently located bathrooms across the Church. To make a use for our old bathrooms, I've decided to convert them into novel "Glory holes", where children may celebrate the Glory of God by speaking to a priest or other spiritual advisor through a hole in the wall. Well, it finally happened. Women got as horny as us. All it took was five years of dry humping in high school, one or two boyfriends in college, a failed career, three giant kids, and a divorce. Now they?re so horny they?re willing to pay for it. Nice timing, God. FUBU BIG CHAINZ DUBZ $BLING$ $BLING$ FUCK DA 5-0 BITCHES BLUNTS 40Z KICIKIN IT BLUNTED JARNELL BABY MAMMA CHILD SUPPORT CHICKEN AN WATERMELON KOOL AID DA RED KIND FOOD STAMPS WESTSIDE $$CASH MONIES$$ DRIVE BY RYDE OR DIE NIGGA RUFF RYDA 4 LYFE PHAT ICE PHAT BLUNT DENZEL WASHINGTON ROCAWEAR ICE BLING BLING 5-0 187 MURDA MURDA FOOD STAMPS BLUNTS PAPERZ BLAZED WELFARE CHITLINS GRITS KOOL AID HOLLA BACK FUCK DA POLICE ROLLIN IN DA BENZ-O Sometims when I feel an unusually large bowel movement coming soon, I'll weigh myself before and after to determine the magnitude of the feces I'm shedding I like fucking pregnant women. If they’re having a boy it ain’t fun, but if they have a girl then it’s two pussies for the price of one. I have put you on a permanent ignore, public and private. I have found you disturbing, rude and generally not worth talking to. According to the channels you hang on, it strengtens the effect of wanting to put you on ignore because of my lack of interest in you as a person. This message is not meant to be rude to you, just to inform you that i won't see anything of what you type from now on. one time i found a bum passed out. i thought it would be one hell of a gag to take him and put him in my roomates bed with him so i did. he woke up to the shock of a naked bum and couldnt stand the thought of what might have happend that night. he then killed himself before i could enjoy my little practical joke She's so fucking cute and sweet. I'd treat her to some fancy restaurant, then take a long romantic walk with her, holding hands and talking about philosophy, art and dreams. Then I'd invite her to my home and ravage her hot ass for hours, and forcing my cock down her throat so she choked on both the throbbing cock and her own rectal juice. I'd then proceed to cum on her cute innocent face. Then, as the ultimate love gift, I'd carry her in my arms to the tub and let my piss wash away the semen and last dignity from her. I'd whisper "I love you" and give her a tender smile, and cut her throat from ear to ear with a knife. Covered in her own warm blood, she'd look straight into my very soul, forgiving, understanding. A bubble from blood and saliva would burst between her lips, then she'd die. After some additional lovemaking, I'd stuff her in a bin bag. Three Weeks later, some playing children will find her mutilated and desecrated body in the forest. They will be scarred for life. I thought gmail was, like, gangsta mail. I signed up expecting to get g'd up with bitches, gangstas and guns but it's just an email service. hey girl, what kind of religions you into, i\;m all about Judaism, Contemporary divisions, Rabbinic Judaism, Orthodox Judaism, Modern Orthodox Judaism, Haredi Judaism, Hassidic Judaism, Conservative Judaism (Masorti), Reform Judaism, Reconstructionist Judaism, Humanistic Judaism, Karaite Judaism, Historical groups, Hasmoneans, Essenes, Pharisees, Sadducees, Zealots, Sicarii, Ebionites, Elkasites, Nazarenes, Crypto-Jews, Marranos, Conversos, Christianity, Eastern Orthodoxy, Roman Catholicism, Oriental Orthodoxy, Monophysitism, Nestorianism, Arianists, Arian Catholicism, Unitarians, Protestantism, High Protestantism, Lutherans, Anglicans, Calvinist sects, Reformed, Presbyterian, Low Protestantism, Methodists, Baptists, Radical Low Protestantism, Anabaptists, Mennonites, Amish, Religious Society of Friends, Evangelicalism, Pentecostals, Apostolic Churches, Unitarians, Waldensians, Latter-day Saints, Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Community of Christ, Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, Seventh-day Adventist, Jehovah's Witnesses, Mama Tata, Messianic Judaism, Islam, Kharijites, Shiite, Alawites, Ismailis, Jafari, Zaiddiyah, Ghulat including, Alevi / Bektashi, Ahl-e Haqq, Yazidi, Druze, Ahmadi, Sunni, Berailvi, Deobandi, Hanafi, Hanbali, Maliki, Mu'tazili, Shafi'i, Wahhabi, Sufism, Naqshbandi, Bektashi, Chishti, Mevlevi, Tijani, Zikri, Mandaeanists, Hinduism, Agama Hindu Dharma, Shaivism, Shaktism, Smartism, Vaishnavism, Lingayatism, Gaudiya Vaishnavism, ISKCON (Hare Krishna), Sri Krishna Chaitanya Mission, Samkhya, Nyaya, Vaisheshika, Purva mimamsa, Vedanta (Uttar Mimamsa), Dvaita Vedanta, Advaita Vedanta, Integral Yoga, Yoga, Ashtanga Yoga, Hatha yoga, Siddha Yoga, Tantric Yoga, Ayyavazhi, Shramana Religions, Buddhism, Mahayana, Nikaya schools, Theravada, Vajrayana, Jainism, Digambara, Shvetambara, Panth Religions, Sikhism, Nirankari, Kabir Panth, Dadu Panth, Zoroastrianism, Magus, Gnosticism, Basilidians, Bogomils, Borborites, Cainites, Carpocratians, Cathars, Marcionism, Ophites, Valentinians, Hermeticism, Vaishnavism, African religions, Akamba mythology, Akan mythology, Ashanti mythology, Bushongo mythology, Bwiti, Dahomey mythology, Dinka mythology, Efik mythology, Egyptian mythology, Ibo mythology, Isoko mythology, Khoikhoi mythology, Lotuko mythology, Lugbara mythology, Pygmy mythology, Tumbuka mythology, Yoruba mythology, Zulu mythology, African diaspora religions, Kumina, Obeah, Santería (Lukumi), Vodou, Candomblé, Macumba, Umbanda and Quimbanda, Xango, Anglo-Saxon mythology, Basque mythology, Druidry (Celtic Religion), Finnish mythology, Germanic paganism, Norse mythology, Greek religion, Greek mythology, Mystery religions, Eleusinian Mysteries, Mithraism, Pythagoreanism, Roman religion, Roman mythology, Slavic mythology, Babylonian mythology, Chaldean mythology, Sumerian mythology, Chinese mythology, Shinto, Oomoto, Tengriism, Yezidis, Abenaki mythology, Aztec mythology, Blackfoot mythology, Chippewa mythology, Creek mythology, Crow mythology, Guarani mythology, Haida mythology, Ho-Chunk mythology, Huron mythology, Inuit mythology, Iroquois mythology, Kwakiutl mythology, Lakota mythology, Lenape mythology, Navaho mythology, Nootka mythology, Pawnee mythology, Salish mythology, Selk'nam religion, Seneca mythology, Tsimshian mythology, Ute mythology, Zuni mythology, Australian Aboriginal mythology, Balinese mythology, Maori mythology, Modekngei (Republic of Palau), Nauruan indigenous religion, Polynesian mythology, Church of All Worlds, Dievturiba, Germanic neopaganism, Heathenry, Odinism, Theodism, Wotanism, Judeo-Paganism, Maausk, Neo-druidism, Summum, Taarausk, Wicca, Alexandrian Wicca, Dianic Wicca (Feminist Wicca), Gardnerian Wicca, Faery Wicca, Feri Tradition, Carvaka, Confucianism, Deism, Ethical Culture, Fellowship of Reason, Spiritual Humanism, Mohism, Taoism, Dragon Rouge, Satanism, LaVeyan Satanism, Church of Satan, Order of Nine Angles, Setianism, Temple of Set, The Storm, Quimbanda, Luciferianism, Syncretic religions, Cao Dai, Falun Dafa, Huna, Konkokyo, Manichaeism, Unitarian Universalism, Universal Life Church, Tenrikyo, Theosophy, Seicho-No-Ie, Burkhanism, Cargo cults, Ghost Dance, Native American Church, Rastafari movement, Umbanda, Candomble, Pastafarianism, Church of Emacs, Polytheism, Mysticism, Atheism, you know The relationship between gamer and game is much unlike the relationship between needle and record-groove (that is to say, the needle loves the record groove and vice-versa, so says Tamio Okuda); the game has to love the player even when the player hates the game. im from louisiana.drank killed my boyfriend sippin isnt for everyone so be careful LAWL I ONCE HEARD AN AOL COMMERCIAL THAT SAID "AOL IS GOOD" AND I LAUGHED MY ASS OFF AND I LITERALLY PISSED AND SHAT MY PANTS SIMULTANEOUSLY AND THEN I THREW UP IN MY MOUTH A LITTLE AND IT WAS THE FUNNIEST THING I HAVE EVER HEARD OH MY GOD THAT WAS FUNNY one time i invited two of my friends (well, my only two friends) over for dinner at my apartment. i was in a bad mood that day and while they were in the living room playing sword quest 4, i masturbated into the milk in the measuring cup before making the mashed potatoes. all three of us enjoyed the meal, myself doubly so... in part because i secretly knew my friends now have my seed in them, and also in part because i ate the mashed potatoes too and the thought of consuming my own seed makes me want to masturbate into more food. i fear i am in a vicious cycle at this point. someone help me? please? DEAR ABBY: I recently met a gorgeous woman I'll call "Giselle." After we had dated for a couple of months and became physically involved, she told me she had had gender reassignment surgery and used to be a man! I was, to say the least, shocked and deeply disturbed. I did not punch out Giselle as I would have liked to -- which brings me to my question. What is the etiquette regarding physically confronting someone like that? Is it the same as hitting a girl? We're roughly the same size. -- DISTRESSED IN VIRGINIA I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very freedom I provide, then questions the manner in which I provide it. Women make up 51 percent of the population, and because of this, Linux should be banned in government. Operating Systems like Linux discriminate against women because of a built in difficulty compared with Windows and Apple's OS X.Women pay taxes, and therefore shouldn't be discriminated against in getting employment with government agencies. If these agencies had used Windows or OS X, more women would be able to persue dreams of a full time job in government. Linux is by its nature a man's domain. Women are designed to use social interaction and emotions to deal with complex tasks, things the command line are ill suited.OS X, and Windows have friendly and female-intuitive designs that take into account a woman's understanding of objects, ie. folders, desktops, Clippy, the XP search dog. These help women operate the computer by giving her a relationship with these icons, and helpful animated pets. It makes a woman feel at home with her computer by allowing her to relate to it.Linux, on the other hand is designed for command line and programming. Sure, it may have a fugly GUI to hide its true being, but to get any serious work done you must know a bunch of arcane commands with hundreds of options that change with every command. Something like this: chmod a+rwx. Only engineers can understand this. And most engineers are still men. This puts the female population at a great disadvantage when applying for work. Men know this, and that's why they deliberately try to install linux in the workplace.How would women's groups react when they read the studies that are being commissioned by industry on this very subject? Surely, women, when they learn of this, will outvote men and ban linux from the government. I work for a shipping company that deals specifically with the delivery of animals, mostly lab animals but we get some zoo business. Occasionaly some of these animals die during shipping, and we do some paperwork and have them creamated and no one ever misses them. Once I stole a monkey and marked it as dead and burned on the paperwork. I took it because it was a very large monkey and I thought it might make a cool pet. After I got tired of taking care of a huge monkey I shaved it and took it to a prostitute. I told her it was my deformed younger brother and that I would pay her extra to take his virginity. It cost me a lot of money but I got her to do it and let me watch. She was trying to pretend she liked it but she looked sick and Manny(the monkey) was confused at first but he really started to get into it. The whole experience makes me sick when I think about it. The fact that I watched and that I did that to that girl, I wonder if she beleived it was really my brother or if she just needed more crack. But also when I think about it I laugh so fucking hard. I shot the monkey and left it in the woods afterword, I guess Manny died happy. THERE IS NO JUSTIFICAITON FOR ATTACKING SOMEONE. NOT EVEN IF YOU'RE USING A COMPUTER TO DO IT. BECAUSE YOU'RE STLL HUMAN, AND THE PERSON YOU'RE ATTACKING IS STILL HUMAN, AND YOU BOTH STILL HAVE MINDS AND FEELINGS. PS3 is shaping out to be a true status symbol for those who are very well off. I earn a salary reaching 75k per year and that's without my annual bonus.I'll be getting three PS3 systems (two for back up purposes). The games are rumoured to be locked $89 and upwards for each copy. The software price is expected to never go down over time ending the practice of consumers waiting for prices to fall. Each system can not play used, rented, or borrowed games.Having said that, this is a dream come true. This is a true fan system for hardcore gamers only. No longer will I have to suffer being in the company of pretenders. Finally we'll have a system to be truly proud to say we own. Just like the Neo Geo, except successful.For those poor people who cannot afford the ride, Microsoft and Nintendo will accomodate your needs.For the rest of us that understand that you get what you pay for... I reckon we're going to be in for a ride of our life.Count on it. Yes, Firefox is for people who like one tab to use 75 MB of memory, since some people like it when apps take advantage of memory installed in their system instead of having 800 MB sitting there doing dick-all. Look at that little string of text between my screenname and personal pic. See that? That's living proof that I donated some of my own money to help get these boards up. Because I love these boards. And you know what you just did? You just wasted a handful of bandwith and database storage space to post that uncannily awful waste of an attempt at an insult. In a sense, you just wasted a fraction of my money. See that it When my parents were tight on cash, I attempted to save money on our water bill by pissing in the sink, and shitting on paper plates and dumping them in the field behind our house. My nephew used to work as a waiter in a seafood restaurant. And we all know how niggers love "skrimps".....well, there was a huge nigger family one day and they shared meals (typical) as well as ordering water as their drinks. When they finally finished their meals, my nephew walked over to the huge mess on the table. They stiffed him on the tip , and lo and behold EMPTY KOOL-AID PACKETS !!!!! The niggers made their own Kool-Aid with the water and sugar on the table. I couldn't believe my ears...but then again............TNB Well, $600 will buy you a fair amount of fish and will feed a bunch of people once. However, you could also buy a PS3 and SimFishing then invite all the starving over to have a competitive game and, in the process, teach them how to fish which is infinitely more valuable. HI! ANY 1 HERE WAN 2 CHAT??I AM 13/F/BRASIL KEKEKEJUZ LOOKIN FOR SUM1 2 TALK 2.NO OLD GUYSDATS GROSS!!!GOT 2 SEND PIX 2 GET PIXNO PRIVATESTHATS GROSS TOO!PLZ /MSG ME 4 CHATim actually a 52 year old balding port-a-let cleaner Eat shit, you greasy pacifist hippies. I am sick to death of the ludicrous anti-American ravings of you pissed-off geeks. Do you really believe the rest of us don't see right through your mental pathology? Your entire political philosophy boils down to this: "The cool kids picked on me in high school, and I can't get over it. I hate America" Why cant the indians be like the blacks, coming to america in white-owned ships to do our work because we're too lazy to do it. Those cheap ass indians hoofed it across some hippy nature bridge I see what you are trying to do and I advise you to stop at once. You may think your Mr. Slick and that you have some kind of advantage over me in this situation but you couldn't be further from the truth. Just because you got a higher score on the SAT does not mean that you are intellectually superior to me. I have 3 degrees in physics and biomedical engineering and I just can’t believe that you try and pull something like this over on me. Now stop acting like you’re the king shit and remove that cock from my ass immediately. It’s my turn. I like to give my self paper cuts on the head of my cock. Then have ferocious sex to feel the burn. Think about your breathing I get off on sticking my dick into house hold appliances. one day i put it in a blender, i was really drunk. When i woke up in the hospital my forskin was gone and they had to put in 50+ stiches. Needless to say, i enjoyed it thoroughly. Why is the idea of laying in the bathtub for an entire day, naked, pissing and shitting and ejaculating, and being just filthy, seem so appealing? Oh, Brad Pitt? I don't see what's so good about this old dude. He doesn't have half the charm of what I got. Lol, I know for sure women are attracted to him because of his material wealth. Look at all these hideous, butt-ugly rich motha f*ckas and how many women go chasing after them.I'm just tired of all the shallow people, I have never met somebody as deep as me. All my friends and girls I've been with never think like I do. Well, baby, I got a spiritual, physical, and mental treasure just waiting to be discovered right here. I'm like a comet in the sky, passing you by, vanishing like the twilight at night. You've got to hop on the train before it's too late, it's like the chance of a lifetime. .By the way, to whatever asked me why I was on this forum... Let me tell you this, man. I've come here to learn more about astrophysics not ASStroholes. Do you feel me? There's no fear as long as your vision is crystal-clear. Also, what’s with posting your own blog to digg? “Hey, I shamlessly advertise my own ridiculous existance on the intarweb! Please blogroll me and dl my podcast!” why dont animated gifs come with sound :( i brush my teeth standing up. i also like to pee or shit standing up while doing so. sometimes i spit backwash on my penis and let it dry. it looks like that one time i slept over my uncle's house. oh btw i live in the freshman dorms. room 310. stop by and see me sometime. I am officer David Green, badge no. 1039283 you are in violation of Intellectual Property and High Technology Technical Amendments Act of 2002, Division C, Title III, Subtitle B of the 21st Century Department of Justice Appropriations Authorization. I must ask that you cease and desist immediately if not we will take action and contact the server that this site is on and force them to give us your ip, and we will then contact your ISP which will lead us to you. This is a very real and very serious threat. Remove the link immediately. This is your one and only warning. Poop is mostly shades of brown or yellow, but other colors can arise under certain circumstances. For example, someone with a bleeding ulcer might have tarry black poop from the presence of partially digested blood. Bleeding in the intestine, from an anal fissure or split, for example, can stain the poop red. Bloody poop can also be a sign of colon cancer, so you should get it checked out by a doctor if you see blood in your stool. Some illnesses in babies gives them green or even blue-green poop. But another source of blue poop in children is more innocent: it can come from eating a concentrated source of blue food coloring such as ice cream. Intense red food coloring can produce bright red poop. Sometimes brightly colored foods pass through the gut almost unchanged, and the turd may be speckled with bright red fragments such as pimentos, or bright yellow kernels of corn. I converted so easily. Just this morning, my nostrils were sneering at a murky glass of bladder-beverage that I poured out of my penis. "Do it," I scolded myself. "Transcend the stench; it's cheaper than aspirin." Boldly, I chugged three gulps of my piddle -- yeech! My esophagus bucked disagreeably... My pee is too hot and salty! It's icky! I'm extremely liberal, yet I don't mind the government getting involved in our personal lives in order to keep us safe from terrorism. I'm also ok with racial profiling. You obviously know little about what's being talked about. We'll see, and I'll quote you later when you're proven wrong. I eat exclusively from the following list of 12 foods: Almonds/nuts, Berries, Oats/whole grain cereal, vegetables (especially green leafy), Beans and Legumes, Nonfat Dairy products, Eggs, Lean Meats (especially turkey), peanut butter, olive oil, Whey protein, and Whole Grain Bread (which falls under oats/cereals). My colon is immaculate, and my bowel movements are enormous, dense, and dry as a biscuit. I've been using IRC for years now, I love it, it is one of the best chat programs on the internet Sex is a beautiful thing and it should not be restricted to certain age limits. It should be enjoyed by old people right down to toddlers. And why not? Yeah, I hear the jokes about Catholic priests. But people should just shut the fuck up and let others explore the deep, mysterious cave that is SEX. I mean, don't knock it until you try it. Don't say it's bad until you've had your stiff PENIS shoved so far up a childs tight little pussy, you cant say shit. Someone from the ip address "" has been performing port scans and other malicious things on my computer such as DoS attempts and intrusion attempts wich in turn has made my internet speed drop because this person is doing it so much and it is just destroying my bandwidth. Please tell them to stop. No, actually, force them to stop.This e-mail address showed up when I back traced the IP address and preformed a whois search on it. If you are not responsible for the actions of this person, please ignore this e-mail. If nothing is done about it, keep this in mind: I'm a 15 year old hacker with alot of time on my hands. Therefore, if you don't stop this person, I will. I just thaught I would go about it the right way before I did anything. Yo what kinda chili u into? I'm all about the Green Serrano, Red Serrano, Cayenne, Datil, Dried Red Serrano, Ancho, Francisca, Scotch Bonnet, New Mexican, Banana, Savinas, Pimento, BrilliantStars, Poblano, Red Thai, Hot Wax, Dried New Mexican, Jalepeno, Dearbol, Tepin, Habanero, Aji-Amarillo, Bell, Dundicut, Tequilla, Tien-Tsin, Hungarian, Tabasco, Piquin chillis and don't forget the Crazy Chilli too! My d20 is carved out of a solid piece of pure onyx with ruby inlet numbers. It was valued at over $2000. It has an operating system (made by Microsoft) that automatically seeks out any other d20s on the table and crushes them. Anything larger than a d20, laser shoot out and destroy that useless piece of plastic. It can track a pewter figure from 1.3 miles away. DMs fear my d20 because it allows me to cheat without much effort. I simply say "roll a 20" and it does. All other d20s are obsolete. when you make love to a pregnant lady, you get a hand job from her baby, cold rubbin' it makin' it crazy, till I'm leakin' out all my man gravy ohh yeah Y0 what kind of crimes u into? im all about a plan to kidnap a person / rape them / torture them / kill them / cutting off da head / drain da body of blood / rape da corpse / eat da corpse / dispose of da organs and bones / finish ff7 The fish I buy are only the finest sushi-grade specimens raised in the pristine nurseries of Fuji-ura; a lake of pure rainwater which has lay hidden for millenia in a lush, sun-drenched crater atop Mt. Fuji. Go back to your newspaper-wrapped already dead for 12 hours vulcanized supermarket fish. I wouldn't be caught dead with that filth in my immaculate kitchen. Thanks for noticing, for getting an on topic first post I was bitch slapped into karma oblivion. At least two people with mod points went back and knocked down all my previous posts to -1 with trolls, off topics and redundants. I was banned form posting for twenty-four hours and I'm not allowed to meta-moderate anymore:( There some mean people on /. Would you like my resume? I write code in everything from mainframe COBOL on OS/360-OS/390 systems (OS/VS COBOL, MVS COBOL, etc) to C/C++ and Java. I think I know what the hell I'm talking about, nerd. Have you visited my corporation's website? Feel free to read the article about me. It's on the front page. Do you have some more inane nerd blather, or is it time for some Totinos? I thought so. I'm a truck driver and would love to meet other transgendered truckers and would love to meet any Lady truckers that enjoy being with a transvestites. every guy i hook up with ends up getting AIDS. i tested positive for HIV, so i think it was me. sorry guys, but maybe you should think before blaming it all on me. you could have at least used those STD testers on me first, so dont act like its all my fault. but anyways, sorry. Yes, perhaps embracing your status as a social misfit will allow you to appear "edgy" and "cool" as you're going through the pile of dirty clothes on your floor desparately looking for anything that isn't encrusted with either microwave burrito glop or your rancid dried semen I played diablo for like 12 hours straight on my couch, slowly sliding into a position that was almost parallel with the floor. At some point I realized my head was the only part of me still on the couch, and I decided that was a retarded way to sit, but by that point I couldn't move. I fell over and dropped my laptop. My back was spasming so bad I almost pissed myself. In a vain attempt to alleviate the pain I crawled into the shower and turned on blasting hot water. That was no help, but it did soak my tshirt. After 15 minutes of crying on the bathroom floor wearing a soaked and freezing tshirt I found a pair of scissors in a droor and cut the shirt off. I passed out from pain in a bunch of dirty towels and q-tips. Never felt anything like that, not before and not after. Awful. Hey girl, what kind of irc chatters r u into? I'm into pimply overbearing misfits, power-mad failures with an axe to grind, faceless idlers, 'Zany' wannabees, creepy pedophiles, dickless unix freaks, shit-eating mac users, clueless windoze faggots, 'professional' web designers, legally blind php coders with herpes, geriatric lechers on social security, gun nuts on federal disability, and ambitionless retards working the night shift. My name is Paul. If my name were to be used in a function it would used as such. Paul > You. I'm an investment banker. I am scared of daylight, so I stay indoors until 2am. I order in all my meals not because I like eating take out on a daily basis, but because I am so excited to get back to work and look at my multiple lcd screens with spreadsheets open all over the place. Casual friday means I can roll up my sleeves, but I don't because I don't want to wrinkle my custom tailored shirts I buy from Bergdorf Goodman. I like to get my shoes shined multiple times a week, not because I want them to look clean and shiny, but because everyone who is line can admire my alligator gucci loafers that cost more than their LCD TV. I like business cards, so I can hand you one and you can hand me one, if yours looks cooler you better be careful or you will end up like Paul Allen on American Psycho, but that probobly wouldn't happen because yours says marketing representative, or senior sales associate and mine says investment banker. I sometimes wish I had a life outside of the fast lane, but who the hell wants to drive slow? If our lives were cars I'd be the 911 turbo and you'd be the Taurus or the Civic SI (for those of you gunners). I like to look at people and smile and nod, not because I'm a nice or friendly guy, but because they are just another person that I passed in the race called life. I flaunt money because, that's the only thing I have that you don't have. You probobly have free time, a life, hobbies etc. I have money. Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy whatever the Fuck I want. A buddy of mine actually had both of his computers confiscated by the FBI. Apparently someone had spoofed his IP (or maybe hacked into his wirless) and made a whole bunch of fraudulent purchases. About 8 months later, the FBI decided to give him his computers back? with all his fursona's files mysteriously deleted. This is an outrage. I was stuck in traffic one day and just kinda thought it would be funny to masturbate. It was sunny and clear out, so I was worried one of the other drivers would see me, but my jeep is pretty high off the ground, so I think no one noticed. I busted a nut and aimed it down, ruining my tweety bird floor mat. I felt kinda stupid after and my mom kept silent the rest of the drive home. It was awkward and I regret it. I wish that i was Vegeta from dragonball z. Once while stoned i tried to do a kamehameha and im sure my hands got hot. Im planning on picking a fight and while the adrenaline is flowing, im going to turn super saiyan and punish my opposition. Goku is stronger but Vegeta is cooler, im 38 with two kids.... my kids are weaklings, my wife left me and i like the way womans shoes make my calves look. earlier tonight i went into chat and no one spoke to me. i don't know what i've done to anyone...but i guess whatever it was enough for people to stop talking to me. some may think 'well, it's just chat...right?'. well unfortunately, chat is all i have. the only friends i have are online. Three guesses as to who was asked to leave the Starbucks; oh, and told "not to come back" with my "hateful rhetoric". True enough, I just said I hate niggers; but the problem is, everything I said WAS TRUE! I am the world's foremost expert on sticking people's treasured items into my urethra. I have 'gauged' it to the point where I can almost wedge a piece of celery in there, though no one treasures celery. If anyone can beat this, I'd like to suck their dick! i like my urls like i like my women...dirty and mangled The message is pretty clear. Whenever two sheep herding white guys get together, they allow their animal instincts to take over and they buttfuck each other and fall in love. Then, they live a lie and sneak out repeatedly to hook up and fuck each other's asses until they bleed. Then the wives find out and divorce them. Or, the dumb ass bimbos dont know that their husbands try on their clothers while they are away. The cinetography was beautiful the soundtrack, etc. But the message (written by a chink) is still one of deception, love, and faggotry. Sorry. There is no doubt that white boys do play video games well. Having been run off the football field, basketball court, and track by more athletic black boys, white boys retreat to their computers and video games. Unfortunately, this only makes their unathletic bodies weaker, thus seriously harming their concept of masculinity and making them social outcasts with females. Did you know? The origins of the tooth fairy date back to the early 1800s. According to linguist and accredited historian Michael Quinion, the "Toothe Faerie" was first documented in 1825, when dental hygiene was beginning to gain momentum due to studious work of the "father of dental hygiene", Alfred C. Fones. Fones solicited young boys for -- at first innocent, but increasingly violent -- oral sodomy in exchange for their freshly uprooted teeth, in some cases having been recorded as persuading youths to perform these acts of love shortly after the dental work. Over the course of his career, unbeknownst to local authorities, Fones began to encourage large amounts of subsequent generations of virginial youths to procure payment in addition to these sexual favors in order to retrieve their dislodged teeth, thereby setting an example for burgeoning homosexual men of all ages to come. Due to the local vernacular of the time, the good doctor's casual title "Magister Dentali" was eventually replaced with our more modern colloquialism once enough of the population had become familiar with the tale. Did You Know? After maintaining a vow of silence for almost 7 years, Red Hat Linux founder Marc Ewing now freely admits that he named Red Hat Linux after Limp Bizkit frontman Fred Durst's trademark red New York Yankees baseball cap.Durst and Ewing met in Ewing's hometown of Raleigh, North Carolina (Durst was raised in Gastonia, NC), where they became fast friends, sharing the same passion for low-level system programming.Durst collaborated with Ewing on the first preview beta of Red Hat Linux before the demands of his rocketing stardom forced him to abandon his hobby and tour with his band.Durst's position on the development team was filled by Damien Neil, and not many know of his contribution to the popular Linux distribution; however, a google search through the source code on ( reveals many snippets of code authored by 'wfd', Durst's initials (William Frederick Durst).Durst asked Ewing to keep his 'geeky' roots a secret as it would not lend itself to Durst's bad boy image, but as Ewing points out, it was "only a matter of time" before the origins of his NASDAQ-100 company's name were uncovered. If you listen to all of the cds that ICP has put out, and really put some thought into what ICP is saying on them, there are some very strong references to all things biblical. I mean you're really gonna hafta look past all of the "chicken huntin" and things like that. It's not really like the D.C. is its OWN religion, its more like it follows Christianity very heavily. As far as the shangri-la (heaven), The Great Milenko (the devil), and things of that nature, all stand for different aspects of the Bible. I dunno, im kinda babbling here, so perhaps if i refer you to a web page you'll understand more. At the age of about 5, in the bath, I was playing with my lego men, jungle animals, duplo etc. I needed to pass wind, so i did (with a little effort) satisfied, I returned to playing with my toys. I reached for the black gorilla king of the jungle and brought it up to my face, only to find it was my shit. ok, I know i'm married with kids but there is this chick at work who totally flirts with me all the time. She's not into me or anything but she totally flirts with me. I don't exactly not flirt back, and Ifantasize about her all the time. nothing will happen between us because i'm such a pussy. oh yah, shes 6 years old One time I offered my diabetic friend some reeses pieces, which he refused, saying he would get sick. I assured him that he would be fine and he gobbled up a whole handful without getting sick at all. The next day he asked me where he could get more of this special treat, and I told him that he had not eaten candy at all, but rather "feces pieces". Heh. Don't you guys know that arguing on the internet is like participating in the special olympics? Even if you win, you're still retarded. In fact, there's an image out there on this interweb of ours that conveys this message perfectly... have you ever been squatting down and just, you know, tucked in your neck, you know? and closed your eyes? and then put your forehead down on the ground, you know? and then you know, leaned forward a little bit, you know, shifted your weight? and then just lifted your posterior up in the air, pushed hard, you know, and watched yourself take a gigantic shit on another man's chest? man, there should really be a name for doing this. pick on me thru a monitor, i doubt it would happen in rl I know Africa has its own internet connection.. buncha niggers with mailbags run around for email.. Tech Support is like shakalakuzulu kuntakente cheifs that speek jigabooese Since you like looking at women, I think it's about time you get your cherry busted. Yes, you need to get laid. Nursing homes are full of old hotties that would be willing to give their all to please. Since they are mostly in wheelchairs, they don't even have to kneel. Think about it, dude! In fact, think about those wrinkled, diapered old women every time you wank. Think, visualize, wrinkled dry pussy, depends, gums only, shit breath, saggy tits........ This is why it is so tough for Microsoft to break into the Japanese market. They have a different mentality. THe Japanese have a more demure way of doing business. They always strive for honor in all that they do. Is it politically correct on this list to trash Microsoft and show destain for money? If so, I must protest. Microsoft is the best thing that ever happened to computer users, ever. It will never, never be replaced by user unfriendly software like linux or TeX. Never. no sooner had the last inch of snow fallen in New York when the blogosphere came alive with myriad sepia filtered grainy photos of the wintry landscape, long, disjointed poetry about the ruthlessness of mother nature, and helpless nerds half-joking pleas for rescue girl i must be dick cheney because i want to fire my weapon into your back oh well, I'm smarter than almost everyone I ever met in my whole fucking life, so I'm not worried about my filthy habits heh Second-best sex? Tell that to a Linux programmer who's got a slice of pizza in one hand, his hideously empurpled member in the other and a Natalie Portman tribute website firmly plastered across Firefox... Chinese/Korean/Japanese don't look alike. If you think they are alike then I guess all white people are the same too. You dumb crackers. I had a dream (nightmare really) last night that the coffee industry in South America was hit by a blight that made all coffee toxic which caused death for anyone who drank a cup. The entire Web 2.0 startup scene crashed and the bubble popped. Flock went under and Yahoo stopped buying everyone. Not fun. Ookles? I don't know but it's Web 2.0 compliant and has a nice prototype.js transition when you register for their private beta. By the way, I've seen you play DDR in real life. You didnt know I was a goon, but I was there. Watching. Waiting. Planing. I like to take a toothbrush and stick it in my anus. I get into the shower and sit up straight so that it gets as deep as possible. This feels great and there is no pain. Then you can jack off and move up and down just like you?re riding a real cock. It feels GREAT! Fuck all authority figures of any type. Now instead of hearing the song and letting it pass by you I think we should all rise against and do somin about authority..... and they can feel the rage of OUR generation!!!!!!!!!!!!! lol no 1 has 1 that they will give out to even members here i doubt ud get 1 i cant find 1 and iv been looking over a month every hour .. u gota look maby ull find 1 or learn to make i tried and failed so i dono wht to say but u wont get 1 im sure.. thats just hwo it is i wish i had 1 my self ILYAZAYUZIN.......HAHAHAHA...FIRST OFF TELL ME WHERE IV'E BEEN PRAISING VANILLA ICE. SECONDLY STOP ACTING LIKE A RETARD INTERNET THUG AND GET OFF 2 PAC'S NUTSACK YOU 15 YEAR OLD WANNABE WANKSTA.GO LISTEN TO YOUR BONE THUGS AND HARMONY WHILE I STICK SOME 7L AND ESOTERIC ON YOU CHUMP!!!!!PEACE TO THE REAL UNDERGROUND HEADS! I'm usually at the club on Sunday night, and they will have Adult Swim playing on the TVs behind the bar. Having Boo-Boo Runs Wild on at the exact time every Sunday gives me a good visual clue that the night is starting to run its course, and that I should make it my last round so that I'll be sober enough to drive. (So I can get home and watch the night's lineup as I taped it.) In stark terms, Wikipedia is one of the single most important undertakings in human history. If we do our job, future generations will look upon Wikipedia as the cornerstone of the information revolution. If we don't, the world will lose a tremendous resource. This is why we need to keep the jews out. You're a huge assblaster. You're like one huge slimey smelly rocket, flying through space at speeds unknown to man, and shooting off fumes which slightly resemble broccoli and rotted meat. But it's ok, because your flaccid asscheeks, worn from shits that rival the titantic herself, will make up for the kinetic energy lost from your inefficient use of the natural gas the infinitely spews from your cum-filled stomach. Meth is the shortest word in the English language one can lisp while drunk and underage at a gay bar. It can therefore be no surprise that homosexual males have congregated around the substance since its inception. For every meth mouth, there is an equal and opposite meth dick. Found you folks by accident...decided that underground should actually mean underground...although pop-up occur from time-to-time. The revolution will be VOIPed AND blogged. I hope I never have to hear any of these cosplay slangs ever at a convention. Anime Iowa is a place to have fun and to enjoy being surrounded by fellow fans. Not a place to treat other fans in a superior fashion. *Most of us experienced or are experiencing this in highschool* And yeah, I didn't want to get into this, either. It's just that I'm fucking sick to death of furs bagging on other furs just to blow up their own egos. This is what the real problem is in the fandom that "gives us a bad rep". While we're all squabbling over stupid lil mediocre differences like children on a playground, the rest of the world thinks we're all a bunch of skunk fuckers anyways. It's all very inane. I hear you brought a prepubescent kid to a "FurBQ" event a while back. I wonder that that kid's guardians would think if they knew the things you jerked off over, or that you get an erection mentally undressing kids you see on the street. I wonder what people at your job would think, or what your parents would think. Maybe you should wonder those things too. I disagree with the software "Fruity Loops" on the grounds that only 50 or less of the musicians that use this software are actually homosexual. I think they need to either change the name of the software, or have some kind of provision in the EULA that you can only use it if you're gay. Stop faking the funk already. I used to watch Dragon Ball Z, and it was cool, and Transformers is awesome too. But one thing I never got about anime is why do they have big eyes? It's from Japan, that should mean small eyes. I've had sex with a dinosaur, horse, sheep and cow in my dreams Anyone who has taken Linguistics 101 and actually paid attention would be well aware that English uses no subjunctive tense. For you see, gerunds and participles aren't tenses, my friend. As much as I enjoy your witticisms and laughably incorrect "facts", I'd prefer that you research it. Hey gurl what u into? I'm all about the blunt force injuries with no blood and resulting in blood on body and clothing, blood splattering from wounds, death with eyes open, cutting injuries with no blood, screaming in pain and resulting in blood on body, severed limbs, blood spurting from wounds, entrails seen, and death. I was watching myself everynight. Eventually I found myself very attractive, and I finally realized my ability to make her love me. So I raped her. But I later found she was a slut since she didn't want to marry me. So, I raped her again. I think she loves me now. What kind of anime u into? I'm all about the Inu yasha, saiyuki, get backers, spiral, furuba, you're under arrest, soul hunter (houshin engi), tokyo underground, samurai deeper kyo, flame of recca, mirage of blaze, gate keepers, real bout high school, street figter, fatal fury, dnAngel, gravitation, yami no matsuei, theif and detective, prince of tennis, juvenile orion, aporipha0, orphen, angelic layer, shama pita ten, kaiken phrase, FAKE, himiko den, kiddy grade, lost universe, slayers, burn up W, for you in full blossoms, fushigi yuugi, gundam wing, yuyu hokushou, hunter x hunter, sakura wars, cardcaptor sakura, tokyo babylon, magic knights rayearth, scrapped princess, infinite ryvius, witch hunter robin, mahou senshi riui, Furi Kuri, gundam seed, vampire princess miyu, king of bandits jing, rave, E's Ot Gojyo (saiyuki), Sanada Yukimura (samuria deeper kyo), Hiroshi (gravitation), Inu yasha, Ban (get backers), Akabane (get backers), Heartia (orphen), Iori (King of Fighters), Taikoubo (houshin engi), Kyou (furuba), Kazuma (scryed), Larva (vampire princess miyu), Shigure (furuba), Ken (weiss kreuz), Dark (dnAngel), Kurama (yuyu hakushou), Akabane (get backers), Touga (utena), Shido (nightwalker), Ryuhou Quatre (gundam wing), Amon (witch hunter robin), Michael (witch hunter robin), Riui (mahou senshi riui), Shido (nightwalker), Jing (king of bandits jing), Yuuki (e's otherwise", Kai (e's otherwise), Eagle (magic knights rayearth), Clef (maigc knights rayearth), Enba (wildrock), Ken (Mata Natsu ga Kita), Haru (rave), Magica (rave) I have a cat trap in my back yard and its pretty fun to check the cage on a friday night and choke a cat to death while you are half snapped. sometimes ill even follow up with a jerk session and blow my semen all out on a dead pussy. ohh yeah. dude...listen...pretty much evry one hate him and microsoft, sure he's given us some computer crap who cares, its all crap, i hate windows so much, its the crapyest piece of shit ever, i want linux! Everyone who has had sex and said it wasn't that great are people who have only had sex with people they don't really care about. It's disappointing to just stick your dick in any girl, but if it's a childhood friend or your daughter, it's so much better. If your daughter listens to hip hop music, you should caution her against taking MDMA, commonly known as ecstasy if she plans to go to hip hop concerts or hip hop clubs. As everyone knows, when you add E to rap, you get RAPE. Hello. I have a girlfriend. She has long orange hair which she wears with hairpins. She never removes her hairpins as they are worn in memory of her brother while her hair is worn long in honor of the promise Tatsuki once made to protect her. One of my girlfriend's more distinct characteristics is a large bust. Before I dropped out of college, I strove to be as different from everyone else as I could be, reading manga and blasting JPOP music in my car. So, I met this fat, skanky nigger bitch who wanted to fuck me, 'cause she'd never had a white man. I said sure, took her home and got her all hot and bothered. Then I hit her over the head with a crowbar. Just before she lost conscienceness, I told her I'd never defile my white cock on a nigger ape and shit in her face. Then I beat her to death with the crowbar. I ground her carcass up in a meat grinder and made nigger patties. are trying to equate "ratings" for fucking PODCASTS with that of TV? Even digital cable TV? A Podcast is a big hit with a few thousand downloads. 99 of hte wolrd doesn't gie a fuck about Podcasts. OK, maybe not 99 , since the world is about 10 homosexual. But 100 of heterosexuals have NEVER listened to a podcast, or read a blog in their lives. You're really a failure at life, you're 290 pounds, you've got horrible back hair, you sweat profusely, staining all your white clothes yellow, and you've killed 3 dogs by anal impaction. Little known fact: "Chimney Sweeps" from Dickensian literature actually did not clean chimneys in a literal sense, as soot would take centuries to build up to the point where airflow in a typical chimney was obstructed. Instead these young boys were paid for performing analingus on as many as 30 wealthy gentlemen per day. When I masterbate I fantasize about strange things. Like shitting in other peoples mouths while I watch them slowly drown in quicksand. I wish I wasn't so fucked up. What's worse is that seems like the only way I can get off. The average man's body in this country is an absolute embarrassment. Mother Nature has got to be ashamed. The average man is a flabby, frail mess of a joke, a complete and utter mockery of a physical sham. The average man is feeble, fat and functionless. The only time he ever moves his engorged, slovenly body is when he shoves another slice of pizza down his throat, scratches his ass or belches out the national anthem. My data are extrusively and exclusively sorted, indexed, and metaindexed. My indices are stored and accessed on a plethora of nodes over an ultra high bandwidth optical pipe; any item of data in my vast collection is instantly accessible by myself from anywhere on the planet. Go back to bubble sorting your recipe card database. You cannot possibly compare with me. Good day. So I'm sitting at my xterm in KDE hacking some kernel code, and this bitch comes up to me and says "Do you know which of these computers runs Windows?" Well that did it. I flipped up my shades and looked her straight in the eye and said "Fuck no I'm open source bitch". I picked up my 10 lb IBM Model M keyboard and said "I can kick your ass at 120wpm" and broke it over the cunt's head. She dropped to her knees and I kicked the jewel case out of her hand and into her teeth. Next I grabbed her by the neck and said "How's your uptime" before suplexing her backward through the air and into the server room. Some smoke that smelled like burning hair started to drift out so I jumped on my razor scooter and rode off into the sunset. Hello. I am interested in various things, which include: Finding out your real life info(s), prank calling you every day, stealing your IRC nickname(s), and finding flaws in your website (i.e. loading popups, etc). girl, i must be cervical cancer because i'm totally eating your pussy Furcism is just as bad a racism jackass, if you dont have anything intelligent to say shut the fuck up.... Obviously furry is in demand if the mod created a board for it, therefore he needs to fix the link, and you can just avoid it with your furcist ass. Geez im getting tired of lil pricks saying stupid shit. May a tiger eat your entrails..... My Fleshlight massages my penis at a rate of 2700 RPMs and feels like 250 preteen girls giving me a handjob simultaneously. It's encrusted with flawless 36 karat conflict diamonds straight from the heart of Africa. It's powered by an experimental plutonium alloy battery and has a constant run-time of well over 3 years. It has 4 settings, as opposed to yours which has only 2 settings (on and off). No other fabricated orifice can compare to my Fleshlight. woke up around 3pm pretty hung over - i got a new pair of jeans they are the brand wild ass which is pretty good has alot of places to stash shit like knives,hammers leathermens drank a pot of coffee and read the drudge report and huffington post sat outside near some fresh dog shit and smoked 5 cigerettes as my dogs barked at me put on my boots and off we fucking go to clean out the swamp coolers of rich college kids who live a block from the campus - you gota first get on the roof then you unlatch these metal clamps on all corners then fuckin valium hits you hard you undo the belt so it doesnt break w/ frost bite - then you drain the water out of them and turn off electricity and water routing to the swamp coolers - any one of you fucking fucks out there with a swamp cooler your gona die some day fucking disgusting you stash some shit up there like a piegeon or a wasps nest n let it soak and blow fuckin air and whatever the fuck i let into your swamp cooler soak in your room - you better fuckin belive it if i sweep up anymore cig butts outside the f uckin final fantasy soundtrack lovin fuckin failed frat boys yard im gona put a bag of kimchee and chicken grease fuckin sars in his face and ass from sucking the wind of the d - low blood sugar valium and a hang over i fuckin put the shit back together as hot fuckin college ass walks by constantly so i start to head down off the roof theres a sort of ledge then a fence then the ground - but then i see into one of the neighbors yards and it looks like a sort of stable? so i kinda jumped from the roof into their yard but my boots fuckin get stuck on the rain gutter and i flip forward face into the wall upside down kidna fall back onto the floor it smells really bad and the pain is unbearable and i hear a sort of weird snorting sound the door to the stable is open and allthough im hurt pretty bad nothing is broke -0 i just sort of limp into the stable to see whats up and theres this beutiful donkey there - a great ass/mule im not sure what kind of breed it was but it wsa really friendly and let me pet its mane it said my leg would feel better soon cuz of the valium and i thought that was funny i sorta sat down in the corner cuz of the leg pain and noticed i was sitting in a pile of the donkeys shit - wet dry all together - my wild ass jeans were soaked and there were flies everywhere - the pony donkey thing just sort of looked at me and smiled like horses/donkeys/bears do and i smiled back cuz wtf im allready pretty fucked so i start to stand up but the girafe sort of moves its ass so my head bumps into its really toned ass - i cant help but notice that its massive cock is in fact a donkeys vagina - i look up at her pretty pony face and she smiles back so i just dove into that pussy where you at dog you know what im saying - fist into ass pushed in pretty far so i could feel around in the mule's stomach and slowly i felt that she had a sort of hernia? so i pushed a lil farther (my jacket was fucked at this point) and i found that the hernia let me push my arm all the way through to her beutiful unicorn vagina for the first time i have fisted someone through both hinde sex cavities - but something spooked that old black man and he started to run with me attatched my girlfriend who works with me on the landscaping saw me from over the wall and my arm slurped out of the small scotty dogs ass it was disgusting and embarrasing I'm new to this channel, but I would just like to tell you that you are an inspiring individual. I appreciate your efforts. I'm not a pedophile myself, but I happen to enjoy viewing lolicon on a regular basis, so I'm well aware of the prejudices you face. Never stop fighting for what you believe in. GET TROOPS OUT OF IRAQ BUCK FUSH CONSERVATIVES ARE GAY NO BLOOD FOR OIL WRONG WAR WRONG PLACE WRONG TIME FRIENDS DONT LET FRIENDS VOTE REPUBLICAN BUSH&DICK: GOOD IN BED BAD IN DA WHITEHOUSE my brother raped me when i was 6 You know, I find it hard to say that something that has freed 50 million iraqi people from oppression and death is a bad thing. My friend, I bet you haven't read the terms and conditions for this forum.... Take cover, you are about to be flamed! My new XBOX 360 controller is one out of ten collector's editions ever made. Handcrafted from a block of pure platinum, the buttons are various precious and semiprecious stones, expertly cut and polished to brilliance by noted Japanese philosopher and artisan Inazo Nitobe. It can operate in wireless mode from over 3km away, and the force feedback is powerful enough to slice through a four inch pane of glass. While the argument does not really say much being on a PG-rated television program, Data never reveals his genital region on screen. This makes confirmation fo genitals by direct examination impossible. Japanese is such a sound poor language... it's impossible for them to say a lot of english sounds, LET ALONE German which is much more complex soundwise. I think now is a good time to honor ourselves with some put-ups. You know, instead of put-downs? Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Norris instead punched his way out of his mother's womb. Shortly thereafter he grew a beard. Before email was invented Chuck Norris would attach messages to kittens and roundhouse kick them. The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain. Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried. When Chuck Norris has sex with a man, it is not because he is gay, but because he has run out of women. Chuck Norris does not have AIDS but he gives it to people anyway. Chuck Norris has yet to get a Jeopardy question wrong. Jesus has missed two. Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming.. A plane is standing on a runway that can move (some sort of band conveyer). The plane moves in one direction, while the conveyer moves in the opposite direction. This conveyer has a control system that tracks the plane speed and tunes the speed of the conveyer to be exactly the same (but in opposite direction).The question is: Will the plane take off or not?The answer: Yes!The plane will take off if there is enough difference between the speed of the air and the plane. The plane speed RELATIVE to the air speed over the wings is half that of the plane relative to the conveyor.Basically, it depends on how fast the conveyor moves, consequently how fast the plane moves forward. If it reaches (about) 220 mph, it will take off. Carefull there friend, posting a blog message claiming that my users are not mature might just cause the masses to come over here and attack your site. Next thing you know, you will be dDOS attacked, and spammed in your comments section. Did You Know: As late as 1987, instruction booklets included in the classic Parker Bros. board game "Monopoly" contained directions for appointing one player as "The Jew"? It was not until the early 90s that references to "The Jew" were replaced by "The Banker" in all game packaging and accompanying material. Haha. Whatever. I'm in an animation college, and when I was in high school girls used to BEG for picture from me, and it was the most attention I got in school. Now everyone draws so it's not a big deal. If someone compliments you, take it, because chances are I'm better than you, and would mock you when you left the room. I'm clicking your link, n00b, and nothing's happening. I'm clicking, bitch. What's supposed to happen, fag? I'm clicking and nothing's happening, fucktard. I bet you think you're actually amusing. You were giggling to yourself as you typed that line out, and are eagerly staring at your screen hoping that someone will give you a zany quip in reply. Go on, you can laugh. It's okay. Just remember that you're the only one who thought that comment was in any way entertaining. I bet you think you're actually amusing. You were giggling to yourself as you typed that post out, and are eagerly refreshing this thread in the hopes that someone will give you a zany quip in reply. Go on, you can laugh. It's okay. Just remember that you're the only one who thought that post was in any way entertaining. Presumably you're either joking, or you're not a web designer. I'm very sorry to hear about your situation. I'll write a post about it on BlogSpot and Xanga. Maybe we can also start a social bookmark campaign to highlight your story. For those who doubt the authenticity of these facts, note that I have a doctorate in the Social Sciences from the University of Phoenix online, and I have over thirty volumes on the subject in print via on-demand internet publishing. Good day. guns work like this - u buy the deagle at the spawn point and u get the headshot girl i must be the u.s. senate because i'm totally rejecting your timetable for withdrawal of my troops The government is too bureacratic and corrupt to accept the opinoin of an average American. They don't care about us, and we shouldn't care about them. We need a revolution right now. Start it with Linux. F**K the government! It should be extrusively notated (and annotated) that my imago has been ensnared in the viscosity of time. That is why my transcendent self has been importuned (but not without resisting) despite the hydraulic pressure to limitate and delineate those theotons (the untimely microscopic, particulate hydrole) whose essential god-like characteristics have been laminated into an irreducibly minisculate, atomized, and indeed lionized cannister. Such is the enraptured entrapment of my condition. Boo hoo! So their PROFITS are down. That only means they're not stealing as much from the poor. I call that a move in the right direction! Let's face it folks! Companies only profit by exploiting the poor. The very existence of poverty is all the proof you need! What do they need all of that money for? They have a civic duty to share their ill-gotten fortunes with the society they exploit to create their riches. Companies should be forced to operate at a break-even limit. Any excess profit proves that they are charging too much for their product, and exploiting the poor. Such immoral profiteering should be illegal! There are so many people that need that money more than those greedy, racist executive robber-barons! The slavery must end, people! If we don't stick up for the poor now, who will fight for us when it's OUR turn to be robbed? I work for IBM.So I am really getting a kick out of most of these replies.Some of you guys are very good at making it sound like you know what you are talking about.But trust me.... You don't.I think you just want to make yourself sound smart, when in reality you dontknow what you are talking about.This is how bad info gets passed around.If you dont know about the topic....Don't make yourself sound like you do.Cuz some Slashdotters belive anything they hear. I am pleased to inform you that I am currently drinking pure nutrients and dense anti-oxidants in the form of fortified pomegranate nectar. During an average meal I will drink no less than six liters of steeped oolong tea imported mere hours before from his Holiness the Dalai Lama's private garden. In short, the ratio of free radicals in your bloodstream as compared to mine is immeasurably high. Good day. I like to say these following words: 1.tit balls 2.penis nipples 3.doodie poopy 4.pickleweasle 5.testicle poop 6.shit whore 7.shitless tit 8.penis shrimp 9.loomis 10.super weiner discharge i think this guy likes me. evertime we hang out, and do the least bit of touching, he gets a boner, or atleast i thnk he does. but a boner is pretty hard to miss. so im guessing yea.excepts ints ot thru hsi pants, he jsut kidof tucks it in the part wiht tbuttons... the part were the belt goes. but it still goes up, and im not hallucinating put down that joystick, son, and get yourself to the bar; there are all sorts of women out there waiting to take your money in exchange for a pittance of shallow affection Chimpanzees start mating immediately after menstruation has begun or ejaculation becomes possible. Considering that we are animals, maybe it wouldn't be strange for humans to start having sex at 12 or 13. To most, it seems obvious that there is a God. If true, the universe has a definite purpose. God made science. The old flat earth and geocentric beliefs prove that the scientific community has been wrong before, and could be again. Because of insufficient evidence to produce an objective finding, many scientists have realized that much more faith is required for Darwinism, than for Intelligent Design. I went straight for the animation section in hopes of finding the newest Prince Picha Picha tape, but unfortunately found the aisle littered with shit like Yuko Hiba and Haldi Daldi Sucking a Penis. I go up to the stock grunt that's in the aisle over and ask him why there are adult anime videos taking up space in a family video store. He tells me to lower my voice, and I tell him not to disrespect me like that again. He tells me that if I talk back to him he'll have me thrown out of the store because he's the manager, so I lower my sunglasses, look him in the eye and say "I guess you'll have to MANAGE this" and hit him with a flurry of dragon punches straight in his gut. Then I grab him by his collar and lift him straight up in the air and ask him where the Kimba the White Lion tapes are, he says love you man, i had my man back there trigger the silent alarm. "I may not be a lion, but hear my roar" and I throw him 20 feet in front of me into the cash register, "You're due back in six days". Three of his employees come running out of the back room with nunchucks in their hands and I jump up on the counter, latch onto the ceiling lights and twist their necks with my dangling legs "Heh, talk about a light fixture". I leave the store, hop into my red camaro, and blaze off into the sunset as Moni Hima's Chiba Chiba Surprise plays on the radio. Well, I walk in to buy some tissues, and at the counter, I hear the manager talking about some skateboard punks in the back by the garbage bins. The guy said he was about to have to call the cops. I told him there's no need to, I'll take care of it myself. So, I walked to the back of the store, and lo and behold, a couple of good for nothings were tearing the place up. A couple of them asked me what I was doing here, so I took of my shades, looked them straight in eye, and said, " Well boys, I'm here to take out the trash, then I grabed one of their skateboards, and broke it over my knee. Then, one of them threw a punch at me. I caught it, and looked thr punk straight in the eye, and said " I'm afraid theres no need for you to be recycled, then I threw him straight over my head into one of the garbage dumpsters. Then, the rest of the kids ran away in fear. I was glad I could help my community, and look good doing it. So, I bought a couple of dvds off some web site a few weeks ago and I was pretty upset they haven't come in the mail already. So today I stuck around the house until the mailman came, he brought me a package but it wasn't the dvds I was waiting for. I asked him what the problem was and he told me that he had no control over when the company sends me the dvds. He said I should try to contact them. That did it. I couldn't belive this guy, I pay my taxes and this guy thinks he has the right to sass me in front of my euro mansion, in my freaking driveway? I lifted up my shades, took the cigar out of my mouth, looked him straight in the eye and said " I'm afraid this package is marked return to sender", and then I threw the package in the air and sidekicked the package right into the guys face causing teeth to go everywhere. I then saw one of my ederly neighbors walking toward me so I assumed he wanted trouble as well so I gave him a swift round kick to the ribs, I then looked at him and said "time to take out the garbage" and hip tossed him into the garbage can. I then picked up the crying mailman and threw him into the garbage can, after I had my "garbage collected", I picked up the garbage can and said "let the good times roll" and threw the garbage can down the hill. I didn't see those two guys again but I don't really care, I took the mailbag and threw it in my fireplace since it was a little chilly here today. I was in town with one of my girlfriends today, and I decided to play one of those scratch off games again, I was very suprised when I won 1 million dollars on the spot, this was like the second time I won the lottery. I was about to claim my prize but then I thought to myself I'm already rich why not have some fun with this one? I told my girlfriend I was tired of her already so I left her at the gas station and went to find me some poor suckers. What better place than wal mart? I went up and down the aisles until I found a bad dressed man and wife along with their kid. I went up to the guy and showed the guy the ticket, and told him since I didnt need the money I was going to give it to him and his family, when he started to tear up I tore up the ticket and threw the pieces on the ground. I then started to walk away but this spinless punk then took a swing at me when my back was turned. That did it. I turned around, took off my shades, looked him straight in the eye and said "feeling lucky". I then gave him a swift kick in the ribs and threw him into the pet section, I then caught a wal mart guy coming at me so I took a knife out of my jacket and threw it toward a chain holding up a sign, I then looked at the guy and said "watch out for falling prices" and then the sign fell on him and knocked him out. I left the store but not before I complained to the manager about the kind of people they let in there. So I was sitting in the back corner of eat ‘n park a restaurant in the northeastern region and I hear this group of punk kids terrorizing their waitress, and I stumble over there and ask the beautiful lady what the problem seems to be. The kids being the adept punks they are give her a glare that tells her not to talk or else therell be problems but I know better than this and I tell them that if they don’t apologize to this beautiful belle theyre going to have to answer to me. I pull my shades out of my back pocket, slip a comb through my wet hair, and tell them they have 10 seconds to apologize. The leader of the gang a chubby kid tells me to get loss and then throws the peg game on his table at my face. “I pegged you as the wise sort, and I don’t play games!” says I, and I grab a tonfa from the cop sitting at the table next to them and tell them today’s special, punks served sunny side up, with a side of hollandaise. I crack the tonfa over two punk heads, do a roundkick, and then hiptoss the runt of the crew into the pie fridge. “Creamed or Key Limed? ” I ask the cop as he slips me a fiver and gives me a back high five. He tells me Ive done a good job as a citizen, and I kiss the beautiful waitress on the cheek, run my comb through my hair once more and leave the restaurant on my harley. It was a nice day today so I went for a walk outside. As I was walking, I heard somebody crying out in pain so I went to investigate, when I turned the corner I saw a kid that had fallen off his bike and he was grabbing his leg and crying. There was this guy already there and he told me that he was a doctor and he thought this kid had a broken leg. I could tell this guy was lying because he didn't have any white coat, I don't like liars so I pushed him out of the way. My training in medical school showed me that I had to get the kid's leg straight again, so I started pounding his knee to get the bone straight again. Thats when the guy that claimed to be a "doctor" called me a moron and pushed me out of the way. Well that did it. I got up, took my shades off, looked him straight in the eye and said " open wide doc" and then I gave him a swift kick to the mouth. I then grabbed him and said "time to make a house call " and then I threw him through a window of a near by house. The kid stopped crying then, I guess my pounding earlier worked. I told the kid not to thank me but I did need 20 dollars for my time. He only had 14 so I took his bike as well. I feel pretty good about fixing the kid's leg. Me and my friend went to fill up my corvette last night and there were these two punks there sitting on the sidewalk of the gas station with their radio blasting. I was trying to think as I pumped gas but their radio made that hard to do. I was not pleased. So I went in and payed for the gas and then I went up to the two punks outside. I said excuse me but I think you need to turn your radio down. They told me to chill, they were just hanging out and having a few smokes. I then looked them in the eye and said " I'm afraid this is the no smoking section boys" and then I kicked their radio up against the side of the gas station. Then one of them stood up and took a swing at me, I ducked it and then gave him a roundhouse kick to the stomach. Then the other one took what was left of the radio and threw it at me, I blocked it with my left hand which caused it to go sailing back and knock him out. Then a middle aged man which looked to be in his 50's came up and asked what was going on. I wasn't sure if he was with me or against me so I assumed he was against me, I then gave him a swift front kick to the groin and hip tossed him on top of the other guys there. I then walked back to my car where my friend just stood there in awe, I asked him why he didn't help me and he said it looked like I had things under control. I slapped him and pushed him to the ground and told him to walk home. I then got in my corvette turned up the radio to full blast and much to my suprise welcome to the jungle was playing. I then sped off with that song playing full blast. I felt pretty good about standing up for my rights and I looked good doing it. So, I was at work yesterday, and I happened to walk by this guy's desk. I noticed on his computer screen that he had his personal E-mails pulled up. I asked him who he thought he was to do this on company time, and then, he told me that his daughter was sick at home, so he was checking up on her. I then punched his computer screen out, and Look him straight in the eye and said, " Who do you think I am? Jerry Lewis? I dont want to hear your sob story, so get back to work before I get you fired." He then said a few cusswords, and then, then He tried to punch me, I blocked it, then , I gave him a swift, round kick to the groin. I asked him if he wanted some more, and he came at me, again, so, I slapped him, then I hip tossed him into the nearest filing cabinent. I looked Over my should at anther worker who was standing near by, and I said...." File him under G..... for garbage." Needless to say, I was quite pleased, because now, that means there one less person in the company for people to look at. All eyes should be on me. I'm a stud. Me and one of my friends went out today for some dinner so we stopped at a pretty nice restaurant. I don't smoke and most of the time I sit in the non smoking section but I didn't feel like walking to the back of the restaurant today so me and my friend sat at the first table we came to in the smoking section. Since most ppl should be aware that I don't smoke I didn't think I would have any problems. I was wrong. This jerk lit up a cigarette right next to me. I couldn't belive this fat jerk was disrepecting me like this so I turned around and looked him right in the eye and said " you might want to put that out fag..........That is,if you value your health". The guy said a couple of cuss words and told me to go to the non smoking section. Well that did it. I got up went over to the table and said "excuse me fag but you didn't clean your plate", and then I took his plate and bashed him over the head with it. Then his friend that was with him got up and took a swing at me, I ducked it and then gave him a swift round kick to the ribs. I then hip tossed him on the table and then I turned around and looked one of the waiters right in the eye and said "this orders to go" and then I tossed the table with the guy on it a good 14 feet across the room. As me and my friend were storming out the manager apologized to us but I told him it was too late as I would never eat there again. Hah, then you're depriving yourself of one of life's simple pleasures. Picture a cool Saturday evening.. lights down low, the sun is setting, Mom went out with her friends. You have a slice of pizza in one hand, a Guinness in the other, and a fresh Gentoo install on two screens in front of you. Nothing quite like it, my friend. I came home this afternoon after picking up my copy of gta and I smelled something funny from my neighbors house. I went over there and the door was unlocked so I went right in. Sure enough there was my neighbor and two of his friends smoking to their hearts content. I told them they had two options, one- they could put the joints out or two- I would put the joints out for them. My neighbor had run ins with me before so he knew I meant business so he threw his joint down and told me to leave. I said you made a wise choice but I'm still calling the cops and then I turned to leave. My neighbor then got up off the couch got behind me and said a few cuss words and told me to mind my business. His other friend ran into the kitchen so I went after him. He was in the corner crying so I said "this is your brain" and then I grabbed a frying pan and said "this is your brain on drugs" and then I hit him in the head as hard as I could with the frying pan. After that I called the cops and they came over and arrested my neighbor and his friends. As I was leaving the sarge shouted out to me thanks. I then threw my shades on the ground to let him know I meant business. I feel pretty good about what I did for my neighborhood today. This thread is just a remake of a thread I read months ago on an exclusive forum you're too poor to have even heard of, which counts among its members such superstars as Tiesto, Paul Van Dyk, Kenny Loggins, and Afrikaa Bambaataa. Maybe someday you can come up with something original. I have like 50,000 shells/vhosts/bncs. Bans won't do a thing except fill your list. And 'get to where i am today' is a sad testament to your life apparently. On a side note, I used to op other chans that are far bigger than this chan. I didn't get ops by k/b'ing everyone in sight or anyone that carried a touch of annoyance to me. I reserved k/bs for spammers and flooders, that's it. Everyone else I /ignored Swadi Ghilan's two sons were dropping their sister off at high school earlier this year when a carload of Sunni Muslim insurgents pulled up and emptied their AK-47s into their bodies. In broad daylight his children were torn to pieces, their blood splashed against the windshield as they screamed and died ohh yeah excuse me, but i politely ask you to cease your torpid attempts at manifesting versimilitude through your crude preferences of internet lexicon. my comprehension of the english language is brobdingnagian, effortlessly micrifying your picayune and odious disposition, of which has already saturated me with a pullulating impression of ennui coupled with execration. good day. Some advice to you gentoo users out there: Why don't you emerge yourself from that closet already you damn homo. My computer typing skills surpass any of your so called 'talents'. I can type 'internet relay chat' in the time it takes you to type 'IRC' (by the way, acronyms are so passé). I have 6 custom developed Das Keyboards programmed to a vast array of languages. They are strategically placed across my 3 tier, Mahogany desktop that I had customed ordered from France. I can communicate with 3 different people simultanously while coding the README updates for my unix distribution. Did I mention I have the all-time high score on Mavis Beacon? You have nothing on my impressive typing skills. Thought so. The way I look at it, you atheists are basically like this: "Look at me, world...I can debunk your faith in God and leave you applauding my perception and intelligence to bring forth the truth." Sorry, I've already forgotten your name, but the name of God will stand forever. I am pleased to announce that, in addition to having spotless tiles and grout in my bathroom, my hands are several orders of magnitude cleaner than yours. My fingernails all but sparkle in the daylight, due to their highly polished status. Upon examination under a scanning electron microscope, you will notice that the crevices of my hands are quite literally free of germs or other bacterial growths. Your hands, in comparison, are a veritable wasteland of urine, dust mites, blood mixed feces, skin cells, and pet dander. Your hygiene cannot even begin to compare to mine. Good day. A military-grade GPS transponder is integrated into my brilliant blue HUD which is projected stereoscopically onto the inside of my windshield giving the effect of a gentle, and indeed quite entrancing, box of luminous information about my own decadence floating 10-15 meters in front of my exquisite sedan. Good day. Overweight, rubber-faced men lurking near commercial business centers or shopping mall food courts during the morning hours? Stay away from these people, they could be hamburglars. People totally underestimate children's sexuality. Did you know even babies can get erections? That 'I work my ass off' shit is so 90's. Here in the 0's robots do our work, Cletus. Get the fuck back to Amish country with that work ethic shit. My blog is utterly inundated with trackbacks from across the globe. Past commenters on my posts include U2 frontman Bono, His Majesty King Mohammed IV of Morocco, and former UN Secretary-General Boutros-Boutros Ghali. I've written over three thousand mind-stimulating and thought provoking entries dating back to 1995, and I've received over ten million comments, all from unique ip ranges.There has never been a single spam comment post that lasted more than 0.25 seconds due to superior spam detection software which I have written myself and ported to several popular blogging packages. You cannot even begin to compare to me. Sorry to burst your musical bubble, but the bands you listen to were overwhelmingly influenced by the bands I listened to four years ago. Try to keep up. My musical interests are so vast i cannot even begin to explain them using a keyboard. Go back to reading Pitchfork everyday trying to find the song that describes your life to a T; it won't be hard I'm sure. Excuse me, but that troll you just pasted is over ten years old; i've perused my logs and found myself referencing said troll over two hundred times. Thank you. You see that crystal salt cellar in my Amazon wish-list? That will set you back $27,000 at Hammacher-Schlemmer. Incidentally, I own four. Go back to your Livejournal and post about ordering twenty five cent Chinese Food takeout with your drunken frat friends; you're quite out of your element here. My digital music library is vast and unrivaled, consisting of only the most pristine lossless audio files ripped from the original DAT/DDS recordings (with pre-mixdown and pre-master sister copies, of course). My inside sources supply me with copies of the newest albums before even the artists themselves have heard the final cuts. Incidentally, you've never heard of 99 of these bands, nor could you ever hope to comprehend their genius nor appreciate their obscurity. Guys that are uncircumcised are repulsive to me. People go in and out of public washrooms so fast you know they didn't wash their hands with soap. Can only imagine how much stinky smeg must be down there. There was one guy I was with that was uncut. He was only four inches and that didnt last. The first to say it doesnt matter are small men. Its brilliant luck the guys I've been with have been 8-10 inches so far. Uncut is such an aversion, it makes me want to ask right away to weed them out. i tried to commit suicide so i took a bunch of pills but i was upset when the pills i thought said "die" actually said "diet" :(( i lost 5lbs tho :))) I use the latest versions of Adobe Photoshop as soon as they are released. I have 5 versions of Macromedia Flash installed on my computer. My computer syncs with many 'blogs' to find out the latest release information on new products that I immediately download from a p2p (Peer To Peer) server which I have exclusive access to. I am a website designer; I also do myspace website designs with skillful grace. I listen to a lot of indie music but I was the original indie fan before it sold out and got popular. I also like emo (emotional) music. I went on a drug binge when I was 16 and lost my virginity to a truck driver behind a Pak'n'Save. Brb, I gotta cut myself. Do you want to see my blog? PS. How do I make those clouds? You know what pushes my buttons? You know what makes my bubbles pop? You know what raises the hairs on my ass? You know what tickles my fancy? You know what thaws my ice cubes? You know what gets my cripples standing? You know what formats my hard drive? You know what drains my fluids? You know what ticks my clock? You know what shoots my target? You know what neutralizes my pathogenic agents? You know how much I paid to get you into college? You little shit. Gentlemen, I am pleased to announce that in addition to having leech access to the most elite 0-day courier FTPs, I have thousands of shell accounts, each of which are capable of running an unlimited number of processes with eggdrop/IRC support. My botnet is unfathomably large.I have access to hundreds witty IRC vhosts, using every existing TLD. I connect to them using an unreleased version of mIRC with every feature you could possibly desire, including the most powerful WARTOOLS. This is all powered by my $5,000 premium Dell computer system. You cannot even begin to compare to me. THE PURPOSE OF LANGUAGE IS COMMUNICATION AND IF YOU CAN UNDERSTAND IT DESPITE SPELLING/GRAMMAR FLAWS AND YOU ARE ABLE TO CORRECT IT THEN SAID COMMUNICATION WAS EFFECTIVE AND YOU ARE A FAGGOT. So I was having lunch with my good friend Jerry Bruckheimer at a local restraunt, and we were discussing Top Gun. One thing that struck me about Top Gun that I never really knew why Goose died. So Jerry, or Jerr-Bear as he's known by his friends, let me in on a little secret. He told me that at the time of Goose's death, he was chewing gum and that the excessive juice that was being excreted from his chewing the gum caused him to lose control and die. And this just wasn't any chewing gum, it was Bubblicious. And this just wasn't any Bubblicious flavor, it was a flavor called Lebron James' Loopy Lemonade gum. So if you see this flavor of gum at the stores, please do not buy it because it killed Goose. is it possible i could have bought a bootleg pci sata card? it says siclicon image 3112 but its not working right and the bios has grammar errors. wtf? Anyone who says "F/OSS" is a tool. Free software hates Open Source because Open Source is the little sell out movement that doesn't give a fuck about the ideals. It's like True vs. Nu metal. Stop associating Free Software even remotely with Open Source because those of us in the Free Software movement probably hate you. I scoff at your claim that your windows environment can even begin to compare to mine. I have thousands upon thousands of fonts, and my wallpaper is a massive 2GB at a whopping 14,000 dpi in glorious 128-bit color. My onscreen text is antialiased with the latest ClearType technology, and remains brilliantly legible even behind 10, nay, 20 transparent window panes. Clicking my Start button triggers a fanfare and a choir of haunting angelic voices as you stagger back in awe of my stunning 45,000 item Start Menu. This is discrimination! Just because I have a -job- I should have tax dollars taken away from me and given to slovenly brutish underclass, who refuse to work and instead attempt to mug me every time I pick up a male prostitute downtown?? one time i was in my friends bathroom taking a shit and i was reading a maxim magazine that was by the toilet and saw some semi nude shots of some model (i dont even remember who) and i had the sudden urge to masturbate. i continued to do so and cleaned up and went out as if nothing happened. it was exhilarating and i wanted to do it again. so i did. several times. i even asked to use his shower so i could secretly masturbate in there. i like doing this because it's a top secret that only i know, and i can laugh about stuff and no one will ever know. i also like to masturbate on days in which key events happened. 9/11 being my TOP yearly ritual. "never forget" about christmas and thanksgiving. sometimes mark-paul gosselaar's birthday when i can remember it. Recently, as a reward for getting straight 'A's I took my son to a CompUSA and told him he could have any computer he wanted. Imagine my disgust when he selected a mac mini. It's as if I took him to a whorehouse for his first lay and he wound up getting head from the bouncer. Where did I fail as a father? Pepsi generation refers to the generation of free radicals in your system when you imbibe this caustic brew. Parents, if you have any regard for the health of your children, do not allow them to drink this devil beverage which promotes among other ills: skateboarding, loud music, drug (caffine) use, disrespect to elders, race mixing and in general, the kind of eXtreme living expressly forbid by the our lord and savior, Mohammed in the holy Korang. (PBUH) I was recently made the victim of an ICMP "flood". After hurricane Katrina, it is inexcusable that this kind of thing should happen. It is now crystal clear that Bush doesn't care much about net people. I'D LOVE TO BE THE ONLY FEMALE AT A "SUPER-BOWL" PARTY MADE UP OF 4-6 MEN! THE MEN TALK ME INTO MAKING A FRIENDLY WAGER ON THE 1/2 TIME SCORE. IF THE FELLAS TEAM IS LOSING AT 1/2 TIME...I GET $1000.00...IF THE TEAM THEY CHOSE IS WINNING...THEY ALL GET "ME" TO DO AS THEY PLEASE!!! The government today announced that it is changing its emblem from an Eagle to a CONDOM because it more accurately reflects the government's political stance. A condom allows for inflation, halts production, destroys the next generation, protects a bunch of pricks, and gives you a sense of security while you're actually being screwed. Linux was never "free" in either sense of the word. You may have had downloaded Linux onto your computer for free but someone paid for it. In my case, does anyone know how I can trade child porn with other Linux enthusiasts. Hit me back. I believe that racial profiling is another necessary evil. Its existence is the fault of the G-Unit, a popular "hip-hop" artist, whose name is clearly the subliminal message "GUN IT". He is reinforcing the concept in the noble white mind that rappers today are the tool of satan, coaxing the young and uneducated nigger into a life of violence by instructing him to deal with his problems using firearms. Linux is an OS where files have no association to programs; all configuration and settings are stored "wherever" in text files that grow to be megabytes long; most shell commands are so abstractly named that you would never be able to use them without knowing how they work.. or first reading its "manual page".Linux is an operating system of inconsistancy. Theres over a thousand distributions of linux, and over a billion different modified versions of it. Programs come shipped as source code that you must compile and configure (by way of large scripts that attempt to figure out how your system is running.. since nothing is standard). Linux is a form of mental sickness; a security blanket left over from the childhood of the Computer Age. The sooner "Tux" and his travelling freak show pack it up and move on, the better. Any east slim/lean chinese nsf/nsreg/sec/jc/scouts/npcc/ncc uniform boys intrested roleplay kidnapping/tying up fun in full uniform attire? 23 chn male 171 100 fat guy here in Bedok North. Pls mesg me if intrested, thanks. Surprisingly, my healthy pussy emanates a fragrance EXACTLY like steaming hot french fries from McDonald's. Days when the smell is particularly strong, it makes me long for a large Dr Pepper with plenty of ice. And it makes my stomach growl, particularly in the mornings. girl, you must be a basic land card, because i just tapped you and now i got mana burn I just got back from my trip to Africa and man was it great! First we landed in South Africa and while there I actually got to meet Nelson Mandela. He was a very gracious and interesting host.Then we were on to Kenya. While there I got to see lions and elephants in the wild. A rhino actually chased the hummer we were riding in, but I think the driver prompted it to. I also saw a few giraffes and crocs. Then we went up to Nigeria and saw the different cultures of people that were there. I actually got to visit and internet cafe and check my emails! Then we got a guided tour down the Niger River. Man that was the funnest part of the entire tour. I saw several large snakes hanging from trees and lots of crocodiles. Then we saw a gang of Ubangi-Lips rape a 6 year old girl and eat her father afterwards. It was awesome. one time i tried to stick an egg back into a chicken, i think it gave the chicken an orgasm because all this liquid came out all over my hands and the chicken started to squawk and flap its wings. maybe im weird but this was a major turn-on! I need pictures of your fingernails for a research project I am doing for Columbia University. Preferably extreme closeup of your cuticles. If you could cut them slightly open with a razor blade, just so a little blood leaks onto them.. that would be awesome. girl, you must be gasoline because even though you're pricey, I'm still going to pump you in my van Whoa! If flames were an alternative power source, this would be a nuclear reactor. Very good trolling, sir! I laud your recent accomplishments and expect to read of your exploits in the latest trolling journals. girl you must be Six Flag's newest roller coaster because some rednecks told me that they have been saving up their money all summer to ride you girl you must be a black market organ harvester cause you just stole my heart girl you must be Doom 3 cause when the action starts the lights go out girl you must be open source because the entire fucking high school class has seen your internal workings and tinkered with them Your "guess" is completely wrong. Just because animals can't talk doesn't mean they can't give consent. Animals have teeth, claws and can give audible warnings (growling, hissing, etc.) to voice their opposition to a sex act being performed on them. Also, many animals are quite intelligent and have a much faster neurodevelopmental rate than humans, reaching mental adulthood at extremely young ages by human standards. Finally, many animals are fully grown at much younger ages than humans, so they're physically prepared for sex at younger ages. Comparing animals to children is absolutely ridiculous, and in some ways even insulting to animals. Please do your homework before adopting a stance on an issue you got from a blatantly-conservative source. I hate this hypocritical bullshit. So I can can take a cow, shoot it in the face, cut out its tongue, gut it, cut it into million cubes and eat them, then wear it's skin...but I can't love one? I can't make one feel special? I can't physically express all the love I have for it? Fuck America. I prefer to open the conversation with light banter about my wardrobe and jewelry, then I like to discuss my collection of expensive cars. This is more than enough to convince you to have sexual intercourse with me. Go back to jacking off to your anime girls. Leave the real women to real men. There's something hypocritical about a country that fails to establish adequate limits to medical testing on animals and adequate guidelines for treatment of fur and meat animals yet makes the sale of all crush videos (including those depicting the extermination of bugs, worms and rats) illegal. girl you must be herpes because every time I think i'm rid of you, there you are on my dick girl you must be ghonorrea because you're totally eating my nuts Y'ALL HURD ABOUT DA HEERRIKANE? YO KATRINA WAS CAUZED BY WMDs YA HEARD? DAS RITE YO. WEAPONS OF METEORLOGICAL DESTRUCTION. DA INSURGENTS ND DA TALIBAN R BEHIND ALL DIS. ND FEMA IS RACIZICALIST TOO. BUSH DON'T CARE ABOUT BLACK PEEPLE. No, actually, I am not fat. I have about a 10 bodyfat, actually. I lift weights all the time that I am not playing video gamez (ps2 sucks). Thank you for giving me a glimpse into the wonderfully vivid and imaginative world that you occupy. I say the least. Words can not express my gratitude that you would grant upon us put a peephole into the glorious universe that you are so priviledged to occupy from 9-5 every single weekday. I am envious but I know it is because God has favored you above are TRULY worthy. I love both dog cock and Negro cock, but that is hardly any reason to make either dogs or Negroes American citizens. Just as there will be ways to enjoy Chinese food without flooding America with Chinese asylum-seekers, there will be ways for you to enjoy Negro cock without allowing large numbers of Negroes to roam about destroying American infrastructures. one time this guy showed me his 'drug free' tattoo so one day me and my buddies pinned this guy down and injected him with heroin. he was kicking and screaming and we all laughed and the next day we found out he killed himself LOL Fuck them boo boos I guess some of those jack asses should have cashed their welfare check and gotten some swimming lessons instead of blowing it on hennessy, spinning rims, and crack! The cowardly, girly-men faggot Muslim and Arab subhumans are quite another matter. Islamists do not accept the United States as it is, and actively want to change it into a majority Muslim country where the Quran replaces the Constitution. The lib-dems run "PC interference" for America-haters, obscuring the true details and the important dialogue on all issues. We love "diversity" and "multi-culturism", don Last weekend I slept over at a friend's house, but forgot to bring an extra pair of underwear. He offered to let me borrow a pair of his. Well, we went for a long car ride, and long story short...I shit in his underwear. Not a lot, but whoever did the laundry would definitely notice. When we got home, I pulled him aside and told him about it. "Pull down your pants. I want to see the damage," he replied. I was somewhat taken aback by this response. It was his underwear after all, so I obliged. I pulled down my pants, and then carefully lowered my underwear. I was surprised by how much shit there really was. There were streaks all over my legs from when I had pulled the shorts down, and my penis was covered in shit. How had it even gotten that far?"Jesus," he exclaimed. "That's a lot of shit." Then he got down on his knees and licked the underwear clean. When he was done with that, he slurped the shit off my cock and balls. What a day! How on earth do i open taorent files? when i try openoing with winzip or win rar it tells me teh file is damaged ?? jesus I spent the formative years of my childhood masturbating to a shemale sprite My hole day in skateboarding is just wake up when ever you feel like it eat then go meet a few friends skate chill skate get something to eat then skate chill run from the pigs and skate then go to sleep about 4 or 5 in the morning. Jeff's balls are about 3 inches in diameter. They are green and hairy. When in public, Jeff will often expose his balls as a way of calming a crowd. Often in a fit of anger Jeff will whip one of his balls at someone who is misbehaving. Most people prefer not to come in contact with Jeff's balls. It is indeed a cruel twist of nature that the most wonderful sex coupling in the world ?is illegal - made so by puritanical Adults determined to limit child rights. im a computer geek?? im not the one who spends his time on multiple forums, im not the one who comes here day and night for almost every day of the week and talks about making fun of people on the internet. christ, get a life As someone erotically attracted to balloons, a question close to my heart is "to pop or not to pop?" Flame wars over this very issue take up a significant amount of space on the balloon fetish chatrooms I frequent. I find that while non-poppers feel an emotional attachment to balloons and can get quite protective of their inflatable friends; poppers such as myself see no point to jerking off with balloons unless they explode. Your thoughts? When the female of a species is more promiscuous, the male has to work harder to keep his woman, and thus reproduce. It is easier for him to keep her entertained if he has a more impressive dick, which means that the better endowed male can reproduce more than another male who is not so well endowed. In a species where the women are more loyal, this isn't so necessary. So if the coons have the biggest penises, all that tells you is that the blacks have humanity's most slutty women. I'm prepared to believe that that is true. Wow you're life is so complete. Havning to use a drug to have fun and listening to sucky music must make you so cool. Partying with women who have been passed around more times then your mom must make you a pimp. if you want people to think you know what you are talking about, just put ".com" at the end of everything you so i get home from work, ready to cook some chicken things in the microwave (oven is broke), i read the instructions to see about how long to put them in for.. the damn instructions say, for microwave cooking, to put them in the microwave for 3 minutes AND THEN put them in a oven for 15. hey stouffers you lame retarded fucks, if i had a god damn oven i would use the shit to begin with. it's called microwave cooking for a reason. THANK YOU COME AGAIN At first, the idea sounded unthinkable. Use my hand to wipe my ass? Disgusting! But after 10 minutes of waiting, I decided that it was my only option. I slowly lowered my right hand under my butt and scooped all the fecal matter from my bottom. Not only did it feel gross, but now I had a whole new set of problems. One simply does not walk out of a bathroom stall in a public restroom with one hand covered in shit. I sat there petrified, hoping for a miracle. But no miracles came. I was alone. Or so I thought. A knock on the stall door sprang me into action. "One second," I called out, and in one quick movement I shoved the defacation into my mouth. When I tell this story, what most people find most surprising was that I didn't gag immediately. In fact, the stuff tasted rather good. Scratch was orgasmic. And the texture - there is nothing like it. After swishing the poop cusisine around my mouth for a few moments, I gulped it down. Up until that moment, I hadn't realized how hungry I was. Suddenly, I wanted more, and fast! With my pants still at my ankles, I threw open the stall door and grabbed the elderly gentleman who had been patiently waiting. "Give me all your shit, and make it fast." By the end of that glorious day, I had tasted the shit of more than 100 men, and a few women too. As I was reading that, my cat rubbed against my leg, and it surprised me. But it felt kind of good, so I let her continue. After about five minutes of this, I was feeling pretty horny, and from her erect nipples, I could tell my cat was too. I picked her up and put her in my lap. She purred as I unzipped my pants, revealing my enormous boner. Then, without warning, she bit the head of my penis with her sharp fangs. Blood was everywhere, and i stared in horror as she began to claw at my blood-spattered testicles. I grabbed a pair of scissors and snipped off her tail. She meowed loudly and scurried away. I guess we were not ready to take our relationship to the next level. Is it not weirder to drink cow's milk which is truly intended for baby cows? The answer: Hell no! The only thing weirder than me drinking breast milk, is the fact that milk is coming out of my wife's chest in the first place. It sure as hell didn't do that when I met her. I'm telling you, the whole thing is lunacy. I love my wife, but does she really have to be such a mammal? Some say that I am the king of trolls. Of course, this is ridiculous because trolls have no king and accept no authority. Don’t let anybody ever tell you that Japan is just another foreign country. It is much more than that. My story begins in the summer of 1983. I was an expert negotiator, and that was what brought me to an exclusive resort outside of Tokyo. Two large Japanese electronics companies were attempting a merger of some sorts. After two fruitless days of negotiations, I figured out a way to make everybody happy. I made some phone calls, and pretty soon all the executives were standing in the conference room, glaring angrily at me. “Gentlemen, may I present, Ling.” A buxom young Japanese schoolgirl entered the room. What she lacked in age, she made up for in sex appeal. The room went silent. I was terrified. Had I made a mistake? Suddenly, the executives all burst out laughing. Then, one by one, each executive removed his pants and began furiously masturbating over the young female, while I stood watching. Even now, as I write this, I am getting an erection, thinking about all those precious little penises waving wildly about. Finally, after the last load had erupted onto the face of the girl, whose slanted eyes were almost completely covered in goo, I walked up to her and lapped up every last drop of milky goodness. Oh, how I love Japan. Every time somebody starts hating on the president, it really bothers me. Don’t get me wrong, I hate the current administration as much as the next politically minded citizen, but it’s really self-defeating. You see, the president is not really who you think he is. He’s not the guy who makes these decisions that piss you off. He looks like he makes the decisions. He sounds like he is making the decisions. In reality, he’s just the guy that has to sell them to you. He is an actor, pretending to care about the country. He probably even believes he is actually the president. That’s one of the reasons why people like him at all. Another reason is that he sucks a lot of dick. And when I say a lot, I am not kidding. Like, we’re talking millions of big, wet, floppy cocks getting shoved in his mouth over the past month alone. Let me get this straight: the oil companies pressure the U.S. government into invading Iraq, and then they expect us to be grateful when they donate a measly $4k to the hurricane relief effort? An effort, by the way, that has been severely hampered by the fact that most members of the national guard are currently halfway across the world. There's no way for them to come back to help out, and even if they could, those guys are exhausted. One of my buddies from high school joined the national guard and ended up in Iraq, of all places. He told me that between the constant bombings, the desert heat, the buttfucking, the cumguzzling, the gangbanging, and the surprise circumcisions, there is hardly any time to sleep. last night i had this dream that i was going to the bathroom, like pissing in a full size urinal (all the way from the ground up, like 4 feet high), when all of a sudden i look to my right and there is this old lady standing next to me doing like the fake pissing thing, holding nothing, and staring at my wang, which is now hard. all of a sudden she jumps into my urinal, note i am still pissing, and shoves my cock into her mouth and starts giving me head. don't forget i am still pissing. so she's goin down on me like she hasn't had cock in 40 years, which she probably hasn't and i finish pissing all over her, so i reach over and flush and just leave. she sits there in the urinal as i leave and there is this indian couple, the wife is pregnant, who is just coming into the bathroom wondering what the hell i am doing. i wave and smile and say hello, at which point i casually walk out of the bathroom. when i get out of the bathroom my company is having a meeting so i sit down and all of a sudden this retarded guy who works here starts beating me up, at which point i wake up. I often find myself contemplating what it would be like if an elephant threw up but its mouth was closed. Would it throw up out its trunk? And if so, that leads me to my next question: Would it make that elephant noise when the throw-up comes out? I have played this scenario in my head every day and night for the last ten years and the more I think about it the more firmly convinced am I that the answer to both questions is in the positive. Discuss. I'd love to have a man as my girlfriend and who would greet me each morning in a new an refreshing way. A spray of hot piss, a dick up the ass, an ass pressed against my face, farts in my face, all the while waking up to a beautiful man on some dim morning sunrise, light shining through the curtains onto his perfectly formed pectorals and the silk sheets layed upon his body reveleaing enough of his penis to make me realise how lucky and how wonderful i am. I prefer men and I date exclusively black men. The first thing you need to understand is that the government does not represent the people. It represents the corporations. The second thing you need to understand is that hurricane Katrina is not a natural disaster. It was a product, paid for by the U.S. government, and created by a Chinese-built weather device. Think about it: who benefits from a natural disaster like this? First and foremost, construction companies. New Orleans needs to be completely rebuilt. Second, the government. Every moment of airtime that the president gets to talk about saving lives rather than the war in Iraq means another vote in the next election. Lastly, mankind benefitted a little from all those niggers drowning. The existence of "foreigners" is a common liberal myth. The self-styled intellectual elite, attempting to push their own petty agendas on the rest of us, invented the idea of "foreigners" to lay a guilt trip on the rest of the country.FACT: Nothing exists outside the US! There is only vast ocean, we occupy the entirety of Pangea. (The existence of multiple continents is yet another liberal myth, which we'll discuss next time).FACT: Although the "foreigners" lie was created and popularized by liberals, it has recently been picked up by conservatives. The Bush administration relies heavily on scare tactics involving hostile "foreigners" as a way of grabbing unconstitutional levels of power.FACT: You may meet people in daily life who claim to be "foreigners" and illegal "immigrants". These people are merely telling you that false story because they're trying to get out of paying taxes.FACT: "Foreign" languages are simply elaborate codes used by spies to talk in secret. These spies are everywhere, and they are determined to steal your genes for use in horrible cloning experiments. Don't trust anyone who speaks a "foreign" language!FACT: The word "foreign" comes from the combination of "for" and "reign". The word was invented for reign-for perpetuating the reign of dishonest liberals and unconstitutional governments. Don't let them fool you! There is no reasonable expectation of privacy in the world because there never was one to begin with. You can't lose something you never had. We live in a web of interconnecting lives. Our actions have long-reaching effects on others, as theirs do on ours. The idea that a single man may live as a hermit in the midst of the civilized world is both absurd and problematic for being such a popular idea. Privacy doctrine in this country has existed for one purpose: shielding domestic violence from public scrutiny. The whole private-sphere/public-sphere distinction arose so that some men could prevent other men from interfering in what they manage to pull off behind closed doors. Marital rape and worse violences have always been justified as located in the mystical private sphere. As you cling to the arbitrary notion of privacy, you're doing little more than empowering men to rape and torture women. It's time we got rid of the private/public distinction. No one ever had any actual privacy; merely artificially imposed curtains that conceal malicious actions by some against others. If this does anything to undermine public respect for such a morally bankrupt institution as privacy, then I'm all for it. Gimp is perfectly usable. I know. I use it to add a mosaic over the faces of my many preteen rape victims. you don't understand,you don't realise that the internet is a form of communicating and it's just as serious as talking in person or on a phone. Stop with the bullshit. I've been in the feceshape hobby for a good three years now. There's just something about being able to manipulate the shape of my poop by squeezing my bowels that appeals to me. Plus, when I'm 80 I'll have such control there'll be no need to worry about messing myself. Nigerians make me so mad I wish someone would round them all up and send them to a country where people starve and get gunned down in the street My son has always been a fan of Captain Planet. He has every episode on VHS and watches is roughly 12 hours a day. Recently I caught him licking Captain Planet's wang on the television screen while massaging his penis with a Captain Planet action figure. Is this normal? What should I do? I am a substitute teacher for grades K-5 and I was awarded a gold star for starting a movement in my school for "story holes" in which any student could go into a bathroom and sit down and someone read them a story through a hole in the bathroom wall. I'm an Apple zealot, I'm typing this on a Mac Mini, and I'm going to be clicking submit with my one mouse button. Eat your hearts out you gaggle of pock-marked, basement-dwelling, subhuman F/OSS advocates. whistle core is actually popular in japan it caught quite well and know where seeing various new whistle core bands come out of the country like the blue mist dogs, fire in the attic, lazor beem, robo boy vs the laviathan and various others its just a matter of time till they hit the charts here Dude you have to own one first to understand, people that hate them haven't owned them. I owned two and flipped them both, luxury eddie bauers one had 20s on it and a TV inside with a ps2 man, flipped them both nearly killed me...But I still fucking love suvs BLACK MOE YOU FILTHY SILVER TOOTHED SUBHUMAN NIGGER SCUM-TELL YOUR CUM SUCKING 550LB MOM TO CLEAN THE HORSE CUM OFF HER SCABBY MOUTH OR I WONT SHIT DOWN HER CUM SLURPING THROAT-THEN WHEN SHE BLOWS YOU-YOU CANTASTE MY SHIT I have two fetishes that sort of scare me. No it's not dog sex or pedophilia. First is facesitting. I want a girl to sit on my face, preferably while mostly clothed or something because an asshole that close to my nose would probably make me vomit. Secondly is something called WAM. It's girls getting hit with pies or having chocolate pudding poured on them or rolling around in creamed corn. Anything Wet And Messy, thus the name WAM. I'm pretty sure it comes from watching You Can't Do That On Television as a kid. I was shocked to find out that there was actually a pretty big internet community devoted to it where I can find grown women getting slimed. "Shh," Snape said, their mouths very close. He lifted his hand off Harry's erection and smoothed it over his cheek. It was a breathless sort of moment, in a series of moments. Harry looked at Snape's face, enjoying the sensual transformation. Features normally so severe softened by desire, flushed, glistening. Harry didn't have time to wonder what Snape saw in his own face, for Snape was kissing him again. Remember when morgan freeman played that high school principal with the bat and he caught the kids singing in the bathroom and he made them sing the school song and the fat kid was a crack smoker. when he called all the trouble makers up to the stage during that assembly and they are all raising hell and shit and there is one white kid on the stage, well that white kid turned out to be none other than new jersey’s own recovering addict of the mafia in the Sopranos: Chris Moltesante. I have always fantasized about being a doll. like one of those real dolls, only my owner doesn't know I'm in there. They think I'm just a doll, when really I am enjoying everything that is bring done to me. Having no control of my body, being dominated completely, and then being put away when I'm not being used. However, I know that this is not possible in the real world, which saddens me. I however I'm sure there is someone out there that would gladly own me and treat me like their doll. Change my outfits daily, use my for their own sexual desires. and then when their not using me, keep me in a locked box in the closet, sometimes for days at a time. Only to be taken out when my owner wanted to use me some more. The strangest blow job I ever experienced was when I went to visit Shaq and friends in the locker room when he was still playing for LA. They held me down while Kobe held my mouth open and Shaq rammed his elephant trunk man hammer into my mouth. I immediately started gagging and throwing up but the meat missle was so big it held the barf back and it went into my stomach instead. Then they took me into the shower and proceeded to turn me into the team pin cushion, it was like I was a tapestry in a sewing maching I got skewered for hours and I loved it. They finished off my visit with Shaq punching me in the throat and taking a huge dump on my forehead and making me lick his balls while he decorated my skull. It was great. I love black cock, I can't get enough its like catnip. Fly catching is a hobby of mine. Whenever I successfully catch a fly, I go into the bathroom and I fill the bathtub up with warm water till it's deep enough that only the head of my penis sticks out of the water. Next, I rip the wings off of the fly and place the fly upon the tip of my Cock--the penis "head". Not having anywhere to go, the cute lil fly runs around upon the tip of my Cock, creating a most arousing sensation.Try it yourself !! I heard this story from an M.D. in Japan. It was during WWII. A bunch of Japanese soldiers had rounded up 3 or 4 Korean women. They proceeded to fuck them in every orifice, but there weren't really enough to go around. So one of the soldiers bayonets one of the girls in the stomach so that he can have a place to fuck too. The feeling was so great that the others all start taking turns in her stomach too. no not really i just see them as mentally ill ..something thats encoded in their brains to love the opposite sex is backwards..and their phormones are fucked also..i hope science can find out a way to fix it....not because i dont like gays but because if u see a kid throw a baseball the wrong way dont u wanna help them throw it properly? Before my last job interview, my hair was really messy, so I went into a washroom to tidy it up. But the plumbing wasn't working right, so I couldn't get water out of the taps. My only solution was to urinate in my hands and use that to do my hair. I got the job. You don't think Bill will include the multiple tab feature in IE with Longhorn's release? Hopefully when that happens it'll shut you Fire-fags up. girl you must be harry potter because my dick is slytherin Did you know that us niggers werer the first people on this planet and that every race in the world evolved from us we were the first developed primates and there were and still are great black minds like Plato, Shakespeare,Socrates,W.E.B dubois,Fredric Douglas........ you fail to realize we created you and we can take you away just as easily,we once ruled this world and this world shall return to its original owners like it was before you devils came along and fukced it up . We had great civilazations in Africa such as Timbuktu,Kush,Egypt,Nubia, ek cetera who taught Mathmatics and liturature to the greeks,Arabs,Romas,s and of course caucs after we civilized the world they turned around a stabed us in the back and clamed it there selves and take credit for what we started and every time a nigger moves up in high ranking yall get scared coz you know what we are capible of doing but our day is coming soon when that black man you know as jesus comes back you"ll see. oh yeah Hitler was a Fa9et and part jewish crackers!!!!!!If you white you aint right. black pride world wide What did the recycling bin say to the garbage can? "YOU'RE A PILE OF FAGGOT TRASH!" , because the garbage was filled with gay porn mags. To which the garbage can replied, " You are a bucket of thoroughly-washed juice and milk containers, populated by an eco-friendly mid-20's socialist/liberal democratic couple who no one will ever listen to" I have been blessed and cursed with two hot ass cousins. Damn what I wouldn't give to hit it. But I never will be able to without consequences. I remember one time when she was 8 she wanted me to sleep in her bed with her and we were going to touch each other. But I still believe in that God fairytale so I turned it down. I still regret it. there is a gay guy in my office, and he referred to hemmrhoids as speedbumps For the record, If a guy wants to rape you by combining something with Roofies, He's going to use something much more efficent than horse tranquiler or whatever you think us frat boys are using these days, a good rapist is going to use something along the lines of a brick. A simple slab of concrete is actually the most dangerous killer in the sex crime kingdom, one shot to the face with a brick and you will be ugly for life, and those effects AREN'T TEMPORARY. You will also not be able to have children for life, because they will be so afraid of their brickface of a mother that they will cower in the womb forever. If you're worried about Progesterex breaking out soon on campus's everywhere you should be even more worried about being hit in the face by a brick while sitting in your neighborhood bar, because unlike Progesterex, bricks are already here....BEWARE!!!! whatever... come talk to me when -your- site wins a Webby Go back to listening to your "Rich Dad, Poor Dad" book-on-tape in your 1989 Honda Accord on your 25 minute commute to your dead end job. So, I just got a job at Starbucks. It's part of my plan for global domination. I'm going to tear the system down from the inside. TIP FOR IRCERS #51: Bathe often, as personal odors are offensive to others Actually, it is incorrect to call me a 'know-it-all' because God is the only one that knows everything. The case against marijuana legalization:Marijuana is not dissimilar to other drugs, except in that its users seem to be rather slow witted after heavy and extended use. You know the type. Tobacco and alcohol have their disadvantages too though, so really marijuana is not too different. Except that for some reason, marijuana users have been unable to make a convincing case in favour of marijuana. They haven't won the argument at all, and their lack of success can only be explained by the negative effects of marijuana on their ability to put forward convincing and sophisticated arguments with the charisma and social nous required to carry the day. This leads me to think that marijuana is perhaps not as innocent as its advocates claim. If it was it would be legal, wouldn't it? But the bumbling ineptitude and stupidity of the typical stoner campaigner is a damning indictment of the negative effects of marijuana. You are either for the expansion of growth of the human population off the earth and into space or you are for mass murder and restricted personal liberty to control population growth here on earth. Are you wealthy? I'm just curious if this influences your thinking. Is your household income above the median of $51,000/year, or closer to the 90th percentile of household income of just under $125,000/year? I was staying in this guy's apartment and I heard people having sex above me. The moaning turned me on so I whipped my tool out and whacked it. Later I found out the girl upstairs was being raped. I masturbated to a girl being raped. How sad is that? Should I feel guilty? Who knows. It's not like I knowingly did anything wrong. Y'know, I may be a lame furry faggot but I bet you I can do stuff you guys can't do. I'd like to see any of you guys make it as a professional poker player :) I started using Linux as a total n00b. I've done nothing but fixing, adjusting, fixing, updating, trying, fixing, and oh, ... fixing - AND I LOVE IT!!! you have to be on malt liquor to fully appreciate it. To the average american negro, slightly buzzed on malt liquor and dazed by the media stimulus of sports and bigscreen TV.. The phone, and the ability to communicate, even in the typical monosyllables of the subculture, is a complete novelty. Thus, the "wazzup" commercial represents the wonder and happiness that a group of young negroes finds in using the technology GET ME TWO HORSES WITH THE BIGGEST FUCKING DICKS YOU CAN FIND, AND THEM IM GONNA SUCK OFF ONE, WHILE JACKING OFF THE OTHER, AND IM NOT GONNA STOP TILL IM BATHING IN BUCKETS OF CUM the only solution is to go up there with your katana and show them who wears the kimono in your dojo My uncle works for Capcom and he let me play Street Fighter 4: The Wreckoning and it has Sheng Long in it and he can do Guile's Handcuffs and his wife is Blanka's birthmother and you can do uppercuts in the AIR (also Breakfastalities) RIP klerck!! :-( Stone Cold Steve Austin just took you in his arms and superslammed you in your bed, then read you a bedtime story and turnbuckled you into the shower the next morning while suplexing the milk into your Captain Crunch cereal fuck ya dude, ya site sucks crap, you be dissin us clowns u gona git beat DOWN, u fuckin wit da Juggalo NATION straight up ya hatah biatch u betta xplain youself becuz u gotta a lotta clownz ready to beat ur azz i dont like the way you try to act like you're too smart or you're above everything and hatred makes you stupid... no it doesn't and ur not above this. ignorant is nothing but a word.... fake ass mother f-ucker is a mood that you portray. gay is an expression used by us nowadays doesn't mean literally gay. i should smack you for not knowing that. and yes it does make them gay I've spent far too much time absorbing bullshit ideals from anarchists. The truth of the matter is, I just don't want to pay for anything whatsoever. Britney CDs should be free because I think that somehow the constitution protects my illegal copying and distribution under some freedom of speech law or fair use act. Even though I don't have to go out and buy luxury items, I'm gonna whine and bitch anyway. Oh u FUCkIn RaCISt BItCh Dont b TalkIn To mA Kuzin LIKE DAt. u FUCkIN TRiFoLIn IrISh diCK SUCkER...~N~ 1st of all i dont Why u tALkIn ABOut pEopLe WHen UR Azz Iz ugLy Azz FUCk..1st U NeeD 2 b CheckIn ur Self den Talk BOut PeopLe..! Dont hate Juz BEcause oTha PEOple COuld Eat MOre Than u Can n not get F-A-T .. n because people are Prettier dan U..! hi, i recently read about sex with insects and fine it fasinated me.i went to a pet store and bought crickets. taking them home i put some in a jar and lowered it over my cock and balls. the sensation of them crawling all over was overwhelming and i orgasmed quickly. is this normal??? I was wondering if anyone knows of surgeries that can correct elongated labia, or if there's anything you can do to make them look more normal. They look disgusting to me. I'm not a chick or anything, I just really hate this. My girlfriend's "axe wound", if you will, looks like a bloated sea zombie. Thanks in advanced. girl you must be real networks because i cannot get at your media without installing this ridiculous software What's up with black people and sandwiches? It seems like every time I see some illiterate welfare monkey jiving his ass down the street, he is busy cramming half of a submarine sandwich into his ape-maw. Is this some kind of nigger code for the imminent helter-skelter racewar? I KNOW I JUST GOT HERE BUT YOU ARE ALL JUST THE COOLEST PEOPLE IN THE WORLD AND TOTALLY JUST LIKE ME!! WE SHOULD BE FRIENDS FOREVER AND THEN I GET OPS Why fuss with KDE when you can buy an Apple? Why futz around with this? If you want state of the art GUI, why not just buy a Mac? KDE may emerge as great interface for your cell phone; but at the end of the day, it's just a toy. Serious Unix developers are switching to Apple. Of course you can get sick from eating poop. But you can get hurt and die in an automobile wreck, too. Do you plan to avoid cars in the future? Of course not. Knowledge of the consequences deters few cigarette smokers.You can not catch any disease from the shit you eat that the donor did not have. My "quality control" standards have served me well and I don't even know who the donor was much less which diseases he had.Remember, not all shit is created equally. Some shit really smells and tastes bad! More specifically, a harsh acrid "smoky" odor and very bitter taste I consider bad. If it looks bad or lacks the classic grogan appearance, I'd say lose it in a hurry. The problem with being a bottom is that you can not be selective about the shit, it comes prepackaged :-) Not always [usually not] the kind we'd like to have. If you decide to proceed anyway, the most dire health consequence is probably hepatitis, of course you can't get it unless he has it, in which case you may get it from kissing, sucking, or rimming, etc.; so don't just blame the shit. You can also pick up parasites and amoebae. If you get an upset stomach, Tumms will usually help. I'm HIV negative, even after all these years of eating shit from thousands of guys mostly anonymously, but I have to admit that I have had to take Flagyl once or twice, and even now, I clean myself out a couple times a year with Noroxin [one tab a day for 5 days].If you have a problem and it lasts for more than five days or have very severe symptoms: see a doctor and don't be bashful about telling him what you did. It is wise to establish a good relationship with a physician before you need one! You can avoid a lot of expensive diagnostics by just suggesting he prescribe Noroxin or later if that doesn't work Flagyl.A final thought here. Your toilet training and societal taboos are frequently sufficient to cause you to worry or feel guilty after your first scat experiences. This can cause you to conjure up psychosomatic illnesses limited only by your imagination. Know yourself and be aware that this may be a problem. Need to be taken to dark side, expermented on, brought down to sub human level. Have swallowed dog shit. Gotten into extreme pain. Had balls severly abused and tortured. An y other sub humans out there need it as bad. Any evil tops really into bringing a guy down? any other guys into blood? girl u must be muslim cause im jihard as hell Mathematically speaking, it would appear that you were a 2:1 favorite to find the page you were looking for. Your click was questionable though given the odds and the fact that any content on this site is likely to be crap anyway. I wouldn\'t say that a poor web surfer but I think it.s highly unlikely that you could be a long term winner at higher stakes web surfing. go back to tabulating your ultimate apple dream machine on then playing snes all night Never clean up or shower here. The dried shit flakes off my body and sometimes i'll brush a bit out of my beard. My head is shaved so it just flakes off there too. Hell yes, I STINK. And my mouth smells like a sewer. That's theway I like it! I may clear a few people out of a room when I walk in but I haven't been thrown out of a Wallmart yet. I shit into a tupper ware. I also like metal containers like the ones you use for camping or in the military. then i freeze them or keep them in the refrigerator for a few days. if you really seal the container tight, the shit can be stored much longer. Have you ever tried to shove a frozen turd up your ass? that is really hot, fuck yourself with your own turd. cool I, too, prefer anyone I'm messaging to be literate and admit to a sneering contempt for people who can't seem to break out of the "cute" Internet misspellings and shortcuts. Children, grow up. I got my 10 year old niece drunk and then penetrated her with a sharpie. I later found out that the penetration had ruptured her vaginal walls, and her mother accused my broher of being a child molestor as grounds for divorce. He lost the case, and is now serving 20 years. I'm not really gay, I just act that way to annoy/creep out people. There is no god, because if there were, when my time of sorrow began, he would have been there to help me. Why do I have an illness such as depression, if supposedly god makes everyone that loves him happy? Fuck him and his false offers. Fuck religion! Greetings nerds. As you can clearly see, my Slashdot ID is far lower than any of you can dream to have. Therefore all comments to this interesting and controversial article will have to be replies to my comment. If you fail to do this, I will search out your every post and mod them accordingly with my vast amounts of accumulated mod points. You have been warned. Good day. BLOGGABLES ??? THE BLOGOSPHERE ??? BLOGOMATIC ??? SIMULBLOGCAST ??? ECOBLOGS ??? METABLOGS ??? BLOGS OF BLOGS ??? MEDIABLOGS ??? CATABLOG ??? UBERBLOG ??? BLOGSERVATION ??? RADIOBLOGS ??? BLOGSPIRATION ??? BLOGDEX ??? BLOGDIGGER ??? BLOGLINES ??? BLOGPULSE ??? BLOGRUNNER ??? BLOGSNOW ??? BLOGWISE ??? BLOGBRITY ??? BLOGS OF BLOGS TALKING ABOUT BLOGGING BLOGS ??? woah! way to be sexist. i'm a girl hacker and exclusive linux user since 1998 and i'm certainly not alone IMPORTANT NOTICE: anybody that has Windows XP 5.1 2600 release from Devilsown, FCKGW-RHQQ2-YXRKT-8TG6W-2B7Q8 - GET OFF THE INTERNET NOW!!! MICROSOFT IS ABOUT TO DO A SWEEP! son, if you were a true music fan you would know that no good songs are 4/4 go play with your fucking casio. I got a 5+ on all 23 of my AP tests, a 2400 on the SAT, a 1337 on the ACT, but it's not a big deal since I have a 270 IQ. I was drunk, high, and getting a blowjob during every test, and I didn't study for any of them or sleep in the prior weeks. I dont even know what indie rock is, but it sure as fuck isnt going to get you play with any of the girls I hang out with. Okay, let's break it down, people.If you're a guy there is no such thing as bisexual.There is only straight and gay.If you willingly touch a dick then you are gay.If you willingly let a dick touch you then you are gay.If you score anything other than zero on the Kinsey Scale: Gay.If you experimented once when you were young and got married to a woman and had children and lived a happy productive life forever after: Still gay.Yes, we know that you don't like to be called gay but you chose the dick, now sleep with it."Bi" is not different from gay it is just what homos call themselves.You can call yourself a "striped bass" for all we care folks, you're still filthy faggots and you're going to hell!!!! God isn't fooled. Why must you trolls come to our forums and post stupid shit trying to rile us up? Your posts don't even bother 99 of us, so just quit it. Any one who agrees with me post the number "1" in this thread. I am a node of server. Born of flesh and blood, but enhanced by the power of its web. I have no use for pain or fear. My scripts are a focus of my will. My strength is my knowledge. My weapons are my skills. Information is the blood of my body. I am part of the greater network. I am host to the vast data of server. My flesh is weak, but my connection is eternal; And therefore, I am a god. TO ALL THE BITCHEY 12 YEAR OLD SLIPCOCK FANS..PLEASE SHUT UP BEFORE YOU HURT YOUR SELVES CRYING BLACK EYE SHADOW TEARS OF RAGE OVER MY COMMENTS..OBVIOUSLY YOU NO IM CORRECT OTHERWSIE WHY WOULD YOU SHIT THAT MANY TIMES IN YOUR PANTS OVER MY LONLEY COMMETNS!!YOU FUCK HEADS SHOULD SHUT UP ,QUIT SCHOOL(if you havent allready cause the kids dont ''get'' your wigger,crack smoking nigger/jew fucking, garbage smelling italin ass) AND GET A JOB AT THE CARWASH QUICK BEFORE SOME SPIC WITH A BETTER TASTE IN MUSIC GETS THE JOB!!!I CAN JUST SEE IT NOW THE SLIPKNOT CONVICT IN HIS ORANGE OVERALLS PICKING UP MY USED RUBBERS ON THE SIDE OF THE HIGHWAY LOL!!!!ONE GROWN MAN CAN TAKE OUT 20+SLIPCOCK WORSHIPERS MOST OF THEM ARE GIRLS ANYWAYS SO MAYBE THEYLL GET A NICE RAPE!!!AND THEN GET THROWN OFF A FUCKING BRIDGE ONTO YOUR FAGGOT GHETTO SHIT HOLE OF AS HOUSE!!!I WILL MAKE SURE TO TAKE PLENTY OF SHITS ON THE HIGHWAY AND LEAVE FILLED RUBBERS FOR YOU FAGS WHEN YOU GET ON ''JUVEY''FOR ONE OF YOUR PETTY CRIMES!!!ENJOY YOUR FREEDUMB WHILE IT LASTS YOU FUCKING NIGGERS!!!YOU WILL BE SITTING IN SOME JAIL SOON WRITING TEAR FILLED LETTERS TO COREY TAYLOR OR YOUR GRANDMOTHER!!!HAHA ..IM OFFF TO WATCH SOME FRESH PRINCE OF BELL AIR..YOU CUNTS IM SURE ARE OFF TO GET ''BLAZED''AND HAVE CRACK ADDICTED BABYS AT AGE 13 GOOD LUCK IN YOUR SHIT HOLE LIVES NIGGERS!!! fuck you sXe faggot ass niggers. yeah i said faggot and nigger i guess and racist and a homophobe huh. yall are all fucking scenesters that probally fucking stand on the out side of the pit with you little Xs on your hands trying to be hXc but really your just stupid as shit. do we walk around with fukcing Os on our hands if we do drugs. give it a break its all a fucking trend arent you just so rad to claim edge i wish i was that cool oh well to bad me and your mom did heroin last night together. so all in all i guess im saying FUCK YOU TRENDY ASS PUSSY BITCHS. sXe is not cool dont claim it be it you fucking anal cunt. Hey guys, I'm protesting those starfield screen savers. Aren't screen savers supposed to protect your monitor from getting the image burned on? What if you permanently get stars flying on your monitor, that seems like it'd be worse than something useful like your taxes. Morons. Watermelon represents the ripe breasts of white women which the negro wishes to rape, while the green color represents the money he wishes to steal. The dark bands on the melon represent the bars of a jail cell, the negro's ultimate destination. Hello my name is Brad. I am gothic, and proper. I dress in all black all of the time. I talk very intelligently by using large well articulated words. I really don?t like Internet ?lingo? that much. I never understand what the fuck it means, and really, ?l8ter?? Come on...LATER. Is it really that hard to type? I do also wear makeup which includes eyeliner, eye shadow, lipstick, etc, etc. Girl you must be London because I want to explode inside your tunnel out all day, in a series of events culminating in MY BAND'S FIRST PERFORMANCE AT HAMILTON STREET... holy shit dude.. i am gunna be so nervus lol. ever sense the two weeks wwe have been practicing in my stepdads garage are band has ben waiting for this night and my entire 3rd period Algebra class is totally coming i hope we score some pussy and some weed lol lol fukkin kickass.... we are playin all of our originl stuff including song titled "Party Party Party" in D minor, "The Song About The Girl Who Wouldn't Dance With Me At Homecoming" (tentative title) in D minor, and "Beer Is Good Girls Are Gay" in hmmm in hmm well lol ok that 1 isnt in a key lol im not a fukkin musik queer how shuld i kno anyway i hope to see u all their to experiense the thrill of our decibles If there is one thing that OSS has shown, it is that full time software teams do not produce better quality products than the amateurs (example: Linux v. windows) If Microsoft gets rid of that millions lines of spaghetti code in Windows XP (expect the same in Longhorn 2006 & Blackcomb 2112) and comes up with a brand new efficient system that equals the Apple, Apple can finally be laid to rest. After all Microsoft is the standard, like the Qwerty keyboard. You are going to have to live with Microsoft and those millions of lines of spaghetti code for some years to come. I went to some IP that should have taken me to a warez server and it took me to one with a lot of porn and banners :( It appears as though Robert Hanssen, the American FBI agent accused of selling American secrets to the Russians, was a registered Linux user!!! This is further evidence, as if any more was needed, that Linux and communism are inseperable, and that anyone using Linux is supporting the communist murder of millions! Final Fantasy? Please. The game is slow and repetitive. Meanial tasks such as just finding your way out of a cave can be extremely difficult. Also, you must power up / gain levels buy engaging in mini-conflicts throughout the game. These conflicts require NO eye / hand coordination, are extremely tedious and occur about, oh, every 1.5 seconds. If you enjoy games that keep you moving and require "gaming" skills, stay away from this game. I enjoy the idea of a "Fantasy" concept, but, personally, I would much rather read Tolkein than spend 5 hours running around in circles trying to find an exit from just one screen of this game. Longhorn? More like shoehorn, the way they're trying to cram all these new "features" into it. Haha, you NSYNC lovin' assholes really got burned this time. Why can't you just shut your mouths and accept their demise?? They are all losers.. JC has to share that woman from Desperate Housewives with 3 other guys. And Justin, oh my gosh, he isn't even man enough to hold on to Britney (and judging by her new husband it shouldn't be that hard). I'm just glad Back Street Boys have released their new album. They were the original band that every record company cloned. Just goes to show you the true acts are the last acts!! BSB 4ever!~ One time I was masturbating in the closet and my brother walked in but he tripped and his mouth landed on my cock and he was yawning but I was almost done and at that point the burglar alarm went off and I came and my brother tried to get up and run away but his pants got caught on the door and tore off and he fell backwards onto me and my mom walked in and saw it it was horrible. I swear i must be the only person that can use IE and not get all that crap. I bet its because i know not press the X button on a popup...Yeah i bet thats it. Oh and i dont go to a warez sites like an idiot. im poor by choice fag. living in the mud just to get away. if i want money i can get it peice of piss ObjC is able to use C code directly without change. That's why MS is pushing C# - it makes it harder to port code to OSX. With Windows projects done in C, most of the code can remain unchanged. You just add a little ObjC to handle the system stuff. With C#, most of the code must be completely rewritten. only furries have faggoty butterfly and angel wings, us gargoyles have real mans wings girl, you must be herbal essences because masturbating with you is a totally organic experience Hey guys. I just came from Best Buy with my dad and saw this a-ni-me called 'Neon Genesis Evangelion' and my dad let me bought it, so now I have it with me but I've been reading about it and they say there is nudity in it. I'm not sure if my parents will allow me to watch it, last time they found my Hentai folder they changed my parental controls to Young Teen for a month. It's not fair. I'm 19. I'm hiding my Hentai in Documents and Settings now. there are 2 bits in bathroom binary. a number 1 (01) is taking a piss. a number 2 (10) is taking a poop. a number 3 (11) is a shitpiss where you poop and pee at the same time. How about the enviroment? Canonical clearly does not care much for enviromental protection. The amount of Ubuntu CDs they have dumped in the past is unacceptable. They have reached AOL quantities. Don't obscure the topic at hand with "facts". History has always been made through quick, instinctual choices. Intellect is nothing but a distraction when it comes to life shattering situations. Look at how it has defined our history. Do you think I am about to turn away from the legacy of generations before me? Alternative methods take longer, and never completely solve the problem. It is easier for the mass populace to attack a problem straightforward. Consideration for things slows down the pulse of results. Oh man oh man. There was my dad, pissed as all hell dirty and oily in his work clothes yelling at the little pimple faced manager. "Sir we can't replace your monitor because you did not purchase it here." "I BRING MONITOR IN AND YOU FIX, THEN YOU DROP AND EXPECT ME PAY, I DO NOT THINK!!!!!!!" After about 15 minutes of this we walked out of there with a brand new 15 inch packard bell. Then I went home and played wing commander 2 till I got tired, masturbated to sailor moon porn and went to bed. Everyone else in the classroom was laughing at me. Due to my weakness, I was unable to push him away. I tried to wiggle my mostly ornamental white velcro shoes but that only encouraged him. I was thrown from my wheel chair and rolled onto my back. That's when the torture started. That day I was violated with every pen, pencil, crayon and glue bottle those insufferable retards could lay their malformed mitts on. faggot! get the fuck out of here. we don't take kindly to you people around here. you're worse than the niggers. at least the niggers are predictable - they just want to make illegitimate children, eat fried chicken, and steal cars - you faggots, who the fuck knows what you're going to do next? I have been testing Longhorn prereleases for weeks now and I have to say that it's extremely buggy. Micro$oft has a long way to go before they catch upto Apple. i have a girlfriend who was raped when she was in high school. not only that she got molested by family member. even though it has been 8 years since that happened, she is still disturbed and when she sees something on tv or movie that remind her, she cries. at which point i rape her. what a whore! Wee! Look at me! I'm a faggot masochist with my faggot masochists' OS! Look at me! Look at me! Look at me! I can't play WMVs! Ain't I cool! I can't believe I just took a shit in my Wookie costume at the Star Wars convention. What the fuck? I can't stand up and take it to waste chute because I am literally wading in a feces-filled fur suit at this very moment. Any change in battle stance would send this rancid bantha poodoo spilling down my legs and into view of every Jedi Knight within 30 feet of me. There is no way I can play this off as a fart. It doesn't help that I've eaten nothing but doritos and pepsi for the passed 3 days. I can hardly think straight! How am I possibly going to explain this to my mom when she comes back from the store to ask me what the fuck I just did in the presence of Boba Fett. She'll make me drop trau in front of everyone again. There it is. The Ewok at the signing booth to the right of me just asked if I could smell 'that'. I gotta go. Christianity was founded and propagated by Jews. It is also the source of Western art, morality, and science. Your argument is not very compelling. Everyone knows I'm not here to "get down", I'm here specifically to crush you in debate and I'm not going to spend much time here either as I am quickly dulled by this sort of thing. A note to the idiot who keeps sending me anonymous emails claiming to have "f*cked" my mother: 1) Do you really think i don't have your IP address and have a relatively good idea of who you are? 2) Do you really think I care about your weird sexual fantasies? 3) Have you even SEEN my mother? HAHAHA 4) Keep it up. The messages are being logged, stored and passed on to the relevant authorities and, of course, your ISP... 5) I know where you are. I masterbate using a Johnsonville 'Cheddarwurst' in each hole and a vibe on my button. I have acheived 48 orgasms in two hours with this technique. I used to find ways to jack off around my mom while she wasn't looking. I have even shot off onto her while she was asleep at night and my dad was at work. She was a heavy sleeper and it wasn't any problem to gently uncover her and wack off right in front of her. I have even gotten completely naked and stood on a kitchen chair I pulled up next to her bed and blew my load completely across the bed, never hitting her with any of it all. The time I remember most is when I came home drunk (again) and she was already asleep. I got totally naked and went to her room. Luckily, she was completely uncovered and snoring like a cow. It was like I had special ordered this because she was laying flat on her back with her knees folded out like she was expecting me. I looked at her tight little panties and could see the split plain as day. She kept a letter opener on the night stand next to her bed for when she opens the mail each night before she goes to bed. It was the kind with the razor blade in it. I used the letter opener to cut her panties right across the crotch. I jumped when they snapped apart. I wasn't expecting that. Mom never moved. She just laid there snoring like a bear. I thought to myself this was too good to be true. And since I was already naked, I thought about how I could slip over top of her and try to touch my dick to her open pussy. I knew I couldn't actually stick it in her without waking her up. I must have tried ten times to get on top but couldn't do it. I did, however, manage to actually lick her pussy(very lightly at first). After a couple of licks, I got brave and put my toung inside a little bit. Once I did that, I knew I was pushing it so I eased off the side of the bed and jacked off standing as near her face as I could without waking her. I wanted to shoot my load on her face but I chickened out. I turned toward her still open legs and tried to blow it on her pussy. I did manage to get it all over her leg. She never budged. Sometimes I think she knew the whole time and just let me get myself off because she may have actually liked it. I sometimes wonder if she had always known when I was doing my thing around her. I got away with things you could not believe sometimes. I even put my throbing swelled dick in her hand once while she was sleeping in the recliner watching television. I didn't keep it there long but it was enough for me to go to the bathroom and beat off like a fool. I was sitting alone at home one night, curled up in a blanket on the couch. I was watching "Sex in the City" and I heard a knock at the door. I got up, and looked out the peephole. It was Kobe Bryant. I was very surprised, I do not know him personally. I opened the door and let him in, because hey, its not like a huge NBA star is there to rob you or anything! After he stepped in the foyer, he grabbed me and made me swallow my chewing gum. I immediately blurted out that was a horrible thing to do because it will stay in there for 7 years! Kobe began laughing incredibly hard, then grabbed me again. Before I could even scream, he was ripping off my pants and lowering my panties, "jamming" his enormous dong into my tight, but willing cunny. He truly began raping me viciously in every hole, but it wasnt rape. I hadn't had sex in the past year, and I really needed this. Especially from such a well endowed man. As he thrusted in and out, he picked me up and moved me into the kitchen. I didnt have any idea why. He opened the freezer and removed my frozen pre-made chicken nuggets. He popped them in the microwave and continued his sexual escapade. Kobe began sniffing loudly, pulling in immense amounts of air through his huge negro nostrils. "Whats wrong, Kobe? Keep Thrusting!" I yelled, as I was nearing climax. But he continued sniffing uncontrollably. He then dropped me on the floor, reached in the microwave and grabbed the plate of nuggets. The worst thing ever happened next. He grabbed each nugget, smelled it, licked it, and then jammed it right into his anus. Before long, Kobe's anus was full of Tyson's very best nuggets, and I was masturbating to my second climax (I, however, did not notice him doing his thing with the nuggets). The next thing, however, was what shocked, surprised, and scarred me for life. Kobe walked over to me, and said "Ya hungry?" I said "Were you cooking those nuggets for us to eat? How thoughtful of you!" To my surprise, he said "No way bitch! Now eat up!" and he sat right down on my face and began to shit the nuggets, one by one, into my mouth. He exhibited amazing anal control, and surprisingly the shit encrusted nuggets tasted fabulous. Kobe has been coming over whenever the Lakers are in town for the past year ohh yeah. i hacked into an airline's computer systems and stole a huge bunch of frequent flyer points then traded them in for merchandise and got a sony playstation 2 HEY BABE WHO WOULD WIN PIRATES.... OR NINJA??? ALSO NOTE I DID NOT USE AN S BECAUSE NINJA IS JAPANESE AND THEY DONT HAVE PLURALS DO YOU LIKE JAPAN It was only -after- I took the lethal dose of aspirin that I realized I couldn't find my Evanescence CDs anywhere!! My elaborate suicide plans were ruined, but as you can imagine I am quite used to disappointment... so sleepy... Don't you dare talk to me like I don't know my profession. Congratulations, prick, you've just made my ignore list. Was it worth it to you to make your "witty" comments and snide in-jokes to your irc pals about me if it meant you are now disappeared from my online experience? Have a nice life. A computer scientist? what are your credentials as a scientist? How have you furthered scientific knowledge? I am a scientist. PhD in space science, as a matter of fact. A veritable rocket scientist. I have also developed software for the last 25 years. I have headed software projects and delivered software to some important customers, including the DoD. So forgive me if I take exception to some programmer hack calling himself a scientist. "Star Wars" was the highlight of my abusive childhoo. My father brutally belted me frequently, and the rest of the family, a term which I use very loosely, just hid what he did to me. Doesn't matter. Once the US housing bubble collapses there will be a total economic collapse. Companies like Netflix and Amazon will go bankrupt as Americans just try to save enough for food I think that the present lack of comments on this article, combined with the subject matter of this article, speaks volumes about the so-called open source community. girl you must be Frogger because I would cross rush hour traffic and cascading rivers in order to hop in your hole 6 times in a row If you want to make full use of your hardware use Windows. If you want to waste days trying to get an alpha OS to work with hacked drivers and illegally reverse engineered applications mostly written by ugly teenagers who stop doing it once they get laid then by all means use Linux. it's so weird seeing Obi Wan Kenobe playing Alfred girl, you must be an HTTP status code because all i'm getting is: 402 Payment Required I hate when people think they're saving the world just by riding their bike. It's like those black and white couples that think they're fighting racism just by fucking each other. Your a stupid fucker. You know no one gives a shit about what you say. Pipe down and go check on your emerging gentoo box -- ooh i think your _ricer_kernel_ just finished building. one time i killed this hippie and scraped the resin off his lungs and i died of a weed overdose For instance: throughout all of my time in elementary school there was this one kid who would go to the bathroom so he could poop. But he had a phobia of water splashing up his crack or something like that. I say this because he would go into the stall, take down his pants, and while still standing, proceed to shit on the floor right in front of the toilet. It was weird when you would go to the bathroom and you would see a burgundy loaf on the floor of the bathroom. And it was always in the same bathroom. I'm not perfect in english, but I was on college forums when I was in college, and you wouldn't have lasted two minutes with anyone with your kiddy type gibberish. Stupid internet faggots get obsessed with the most inane things. If it's from Japan or runs on Linux watch the fuck out cause these losers will act like Jesus appeared on Earth. there is no such thing as hardcore gaming, anymore then there is anything extreme about mountain dew livewire Sometimes when I get bored I stick screw drivers in my piss hole (preferably phillips head) Then I thumb around my sphincter with my womenlike finger nails scraping the days left overs and sniff it for 10 minutes. since blacks have bigger wangs... do black chicks have bigger holes? As a professional shrink, I was appauled while observing Tom Cruise as he underwent a complete alteration of personality on national television. Although his aggressive display did not make me think him gay, I certainly wondered if he was forgetting his Lithium or if we were watching one of his alternate personalities! Truly mindboggling behavior! Her lips bit onto his, opened, and began force vomiting shit down his throat. Her fingers dug deep into his flesh and John struggled as Kihnda pulled him down. Into the toilet, into her kind, warm love, where they could be forever. John tried to break free. He didn.t make it. The shit was too strong. His penis still erect, a die-hard pervert to the end, loving every last fucking minute of it, John drowned in his cannibal leavings. i wipe turd on my tallywacker. im not happy, sometimes i touch my mouth after playin with faeces. i think i have syphalis or scruvy..god bless triffle, i put my balls in pubes are 4 inches long. Fucked in the ass non-stop, ream my hole, with a helicopter prop, I love ass fucking, yes it's true, I douche my ass nightly, so there's no poo. I'm a fanatic faggot, I love to get raped, got my dad's camcorder, to get it all on tape. My sphincter's so loose, all my movements are butt juice, in the war of fists and my ass, there can never be a truce. Liberals deserve to be KILLED. Shot dead. Hit in the head with baseball bats, hatchets, axes or even ice picks. Hung by their necks from the nearest lamp post or tree. Liberals are the scum of the earth. Whether they're in the UK, US or anywhere else, I advocate extreme violence against liberals! The only good liberal is a dead liberal. I shat on my keyboard today. So I was vaccuming my keyboard to remove the dried up man juice of my past expeditions into I was playing with different settings on the cleaner, and noticed how it produced keystrokes when it was blowing. It made me wonder - was my own fart strong enough to type something? Being the experimenting type, I went ahead and pulled down my pants, positioned my ass right above the keyboard and let out a thunderous one. Turned out my bowel had decieved me, for along with the gas came hot chunks of shit. My computer started beeping like crazy as a huge log pressed down on the function keys. My keyboard went friggin shit-brown. There it was, a steaming turd right across my home row. I had to use fucking motor oil to clean away the fecal matter. I don't know what I'm going to tell my sister when she finds out the keyboard smells like crap. i don't care if you premium member, i will ctl+alt+dlt u / you little fuck, i've got year old posts bigger than u/ before i lost weight, back in ninety-eight/ you was wack posting over at gbs i seen u/ then you came to FYAD, switch your demeanor, well - we don't believe you, you need more people/ troll phds of the game, we passed them classes; nobody could read you 05 dudez like we do/ don't let 'em gas you like lowtax; he'll harass you/ trust me on this one - i'll e-detach you/ hand from keyboard, eyes from screen/ they'll have to hold a cybervigil, put your webcam live stream/ no, you're not on my level get your mouse tweaked/i posted what ya did all year in my first week/ (chorus) niggaz'll hijack your post, make you report to admin/ your faggot topics i'll unpin, make your drives spin and spin/ we bring - humor to ur thread, kill your bullshit drama/ too much bytes for ur modem, go run to ya momma/ Flopping and flailing, tugging and yanking, rolling my micro-burrito between my thumb and forefinger, I desperately Google "Hairy Asian Pussy"... "Big Black Tits"... "Shaved Mature Naked"... but am unable to focus on any single image long enough to construct a suitable fantasy. I click rapidly from one photo to the next, accidentally smearing vitamin E oil on the keyboard and mouse, all through the night until morning's cruel rays mock my soft, greasy loins. one time i smoked so much weed i got to like level 99 of being high then i kept smoking and my high reset back to level 0 and i was perfectly sober except my hair turned yellow STAR WARS EWOX JEDI X-WING GREEDOO DEATH STARS ANAKIN VADER JABBA HUT LIGHTSABERS VULCANZ HAN SOLO AT-ATs PADAWAN YODA ITS A TRAP CP30 CHEWIE Your theories interest me and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter. Also, if you have ever billboarded a request (posting a request more than once in order to have it more visible) then you are in my killfiter as well. This is nothing personal, I just need to filter abuse in order to enjoy Usenet. Do you really think that KDE is completely under GPL? You are either uninformed or a troll. I think you are a troll who tries to say "If KDE was under BSD license, Apple had not given any modifications back." Did you know? There is scientific proof that bipedal creatures similar to modern day wolves, cats and horses existed and even had their own proto-languages. It is theorized that today's "furries" are the offspring of these ancient races. The lolly is a phallic symbol. It was invented by man in his eternal quest to subjugate women and dominate them by teaching children the act of fellatio at a young age - especially female children. To have equality among people, we should eliminate such travesties of recreation. But lollies are too deply entrenched in our society for them to be removed without much harm. Therefore I propose to balance the situation by introducing a new type of lolly - it shall contain two sticks instead of one and to consume it, people must spread out the sticks and lick in between, symbolising cunnilingus. I can't believe that you banned my firneds computer along with my work one. What the fuck dude. Can't you fucking deal. I really have no Idea waht the fucking beef is with me.Really you fucking one. I no longer post during the day. I look at the site once a week if that. Really. If you see that fake persona only had 12 post over 2 months. THat is rediculus for me. So really fuck you. I can't believe that you banned my friends computer cause i posted on it. What did you want me to do.Worst part is that I have had convoy's with you on the other board and I know you have had no IDEA who I am.Man dude get in touch with me and lets hash this shit out. I am sick of this shit.Better yet call me so I can bitch you out over the phone and get this over with..Ps. I am not crunk right now just drunk and go ahead and bann this IP addy wile your at it you fuck head. This has to be the most pathetic attempt at flaming I've ever seen. I was laughing, so if that's what you intended, congratulations, otherwise, perhaps it would behoove you to find out what autism is before make stupid, unwitty posts about sufferers of the disease. Now, if you'd like to try to flame me, make it a real flame. Well, I can't waste all day in this IRC. Gotta go to a T5 meet for some training. Gotta place high in this years TiT and Evo2k5 tournaments. (Tekken 5.) See ya guys. :( I've been foruming for ten years, been a moderator / admin of forums and all that. It gets old after awile. I enjoy trolling shitty websites more than anything. When I got home, the dog looked like it needed some more sex, so I unzipped my cock and inserted it into the hound. We had sex all night. When it was dead in the morning, I was still raping it. When I was 80 years old and the corpse was decomposed and crawing with maggots, I was still ejaculating my seed into the empty shell. Later, I died. Don't rely on risky conventional aphrodesiacs. Our patented formula harnesses the power of a biochemical reaction to create controlled explosions in your testicles, propelling you into the INCREDIBLE SEMEN-FREE EXPLOSIVE ORGASM of a lifetime! She'll never cheat on you again after she feels the POWER of our patented testicle exploding forumula. BETTER NOT HEAR OF ANYONE BREAKING THIS ONE OR SEE DELETED. This is a ribbon for soldiers fighting in Iraq. Pass it on to everyone and pray. Something good will happen to you tonight at 11:11 PM. This is not a joke. Someone will either call you or will talk to you online and say that they love you. Do not break this chain. Send this to 13 people in the next 15 minutes. Go do you ever get these weird urges to jerk off.. and then after you do you get this sick feeling in your stomach like you're going to throwup and passout ? Okay, so you want to mack it with the ladies, but don't know where to start? How about you groom yourself you fucking pig. Here's your first lesson: WOMEN HATE MEN WITH BALL HAIR. There are some common technique for removal (i.e. razor, electric razor, nair) but my favorite is the time proven method of plucking. Start by sitting in a chair. Now, stretch your penis between your testicles and hold it there. This will decrease the electric signals being sent to your brain everytime you pluck, bye bye pain! You should be done in about 10 minutes, and after that, you're on your way to Fellatio Farms. Go getum Cassanova. Emoticons are useful, since they can at least partially take the place of facial expressions, gestures, and tone of voice, all of which give clues to meaning beyond what your mere words convey, in face to face dialogue. They can easily be overused though, or used in a far too cutesy fashion, somewhat like a girl dotting her i's with big pink hearts. If your email has more than one or two emoticons in it, yo Frankly, I am appalled at the way that members here treat the underground furry community. It seems to me like nobody here really understands anything about the furry way of life. I mean, seriously, do you know how freeing it is be honest about being encased in a human body whilst having an animal soul? What the fuck does it mean? What's the point? Is that sticker telling me to drive more carefully because you've spawned, and you're carrying said spawn in your auto-mobile? Why should I care? You're obvously an idiot, so why should I have any regard for the waste matter that sprung screaming from your idiot loins? I'm gonna drive how I'm gonna drive. Just because you've gone out of your way to inform me that you happen to be transporting your worthless Shit-Factory doesn't mean I'm going to alter my driving style in the least. And that's another thing. That shit automatically assumes that I'm the shitty driver. What about you? Shouldn't you be the one driving more carefully because your squealing tit-sucker is in the passenger seat? Why are you telling me about it? If I'm walking to the post office to mail a priceless Ming vase, I don't shout at every person on the street "FRAGILE! FRAGILE CONTENTS HERE, BE CAREFUL WALKING AROUND ME!" No, that would be stupid. However, buying some stupid-ass 99 cent sticker that says "Baby on Board" is supposed to magically transform everyone on the freeway into perfect drivers. I am a 15 year old guy, I am 5'7", and HATE humanity. I despise every piece of life around me, and I understand that this might classify me as insane, but so what. I HATE christians(well most of them, but not all) because all they do is shove there religon on you, why don't they just let me believe what I want? But anyways, just come on in, and see what I have been feeling like today. Later... u all people are goddam nigger fucktards! fuck u all! nigger fucktards! eat my shit motherfuckers! goddam nigger fucktards! fucktards all! god damn you nigger fucktards! girl you must be the recently cancelled television show "enterprise" because no matter how many fat sweaty nerds profess their love for you, you are still just a piece of shit whore that no respectable man would allow himself to be seen in public with girl, u must have a 2d20 spell resistance because you are resisting my magic missile Face it, you just want an ipod so you can hack the firmware to make it vibrate then stick the smooth case up your ass you big FAG!!! You don't me, but I was looking through yahoo profiles and I saw that you are in Texas City. The reason that I'm writing to you is I'm a handsome, goodlooking straight male. But lately I've been getting the urge to know how does it feel to suck a cock. I'm very serious about this, this is not a joke. If you havent' figured it out yet, I'd like to suck your dick. You might look at this email and not be interested at all, and I'd understand if you don't. If your not interested, you can write me back and tell me to go to hell, and I won't bother you again. To let you know, a guy sucks better cock than any female, cause only a guy knows what a guy likes. If you're interested, it will be secretly and discreet. If you are interested, just write me and let me know. If your not, like I said, just tell me to go to hell. Let me know. Linux Scat Ode : The chat has moved off this mortal coil. To replace the entertainment , my pants : I'll soil! Turds smashing into the boxers all nite. I'll take them off and sniff. Ohh yeah. Dats rite. The smell is divine, the taste is great. Now all I need is a paper plate. Going to Butch's with this fresh poopie. I hope he's thirsty. Because this poop is : soupy. My bowel movements are incredibly loose. Thats ok, I lo Its a shame that my body is nothing but lard. Oh the life of a Linux Fatty Shit-eating Scat Fiend. Oh no mom is comming!!! This chat session : screen'd When I installed Linux it asked me for my credit card number. Two days later I got a call from Wachovia asking me if I had purchased $400 worth of Totino's pizza rolls and Mountain Dew (I hadn't). Let this be a warning to all of you out there in the Internet. didnt ben franklin invent lightning or was that edison? So I'm out with my niece at our local shopping mall here in Philadelphia, called the Gallery, we had just gotten some delicious banana yogurt shakes...and who do we see but Mr. Hasselhoff! He was signing sneakers at Foot Locker, apparently he has a new line of Sketchers out or something (?) and there he was. I told him that I used to wish i had a car like Kitt and he laughed and then i laughed and then he got really serious all of a sudden.He leaned close and whispered to me that Kitt was real. He said he could press a button and Kitt would come flying into the mall right there running over people and causing massive havoc. I'm not sure if he was kidding or not but my niece got real scared and spilled her banana yogurt shake. Is this unusual for Mr. Hasselhoff to act like this? This is our first David sighting and to be honest i was a little nervous. YOU ARE THE BIGGEST FUCKING GROUP OF UTTER. FUCKING. IDIOTIC. SHIT EATING. CIRCLEJERK. FAGGOTS. EVER. TO. WALK. THE. EARTH. NOTHING YOU SAY TO ME CAN HURT ME AT ALL! YOU ARE NOT INTELLIGENT, EDGY OR COOL, YOU ARE JUST A PATHETIC FUCKING PIECES OF SHIT WHO LIKE TO BELLITLE OTHERS OVER THE INTERNET TO FEEL BETTER ABOUT THEMSELVES. FUCK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So you're working out and getting buff so you are strong to do what? "Getting women" as if they are objects to do what? Fuck them and forget about it? Some life. "Getting women" improves your social status amongst those who hi-five people for being "playa"s. Who gives a damn about being more social amongst those vapid wastes of food and employment? Video games are a great way to have fun, and enjoy things that are availible to you in life. Not only this, but the making of a game is an art form - by playing through, say, an RPG, you are treated to a grand story that is just overwhelmingly more fufilling than going out, fucking some chick, hi-fiving yourself and calling it a night. for the past several years I've been mailing all my feces to Ralph Nader. Every time I defecate, I do so in a zip lock bag, which I then send to Ralph Nader's home address via USPS priority mail. Though I always clearly write my name and address on the return portion of the envelope, I have never recieved a reply, nor have any of my mailings been refused :| I lick my own fecal matter from time to time, it's not as bad as you'd think. I even got my old girlfriend to try it, I talked it about it for so long, I actually convinced her to wipe me after a dump with her tounge. She got stabbed by some guy 2 months later. A beautiful young lady is on her knees sucking my cock. I am leaning forward and bracing myself against the wall. I can feel her spreading my ass cheeks to allow her boyfriend to enter me. He's in and starting to stroke in and out. Every forward thrust pushes my cock further and further into her mouth. I can feel her reaching under my balls to feel his cock going in and out of my ass. just went to micro$ofts web site to get some drivers for my cousin and it locked my machine - Of course I am using unbuntu and firefox - funny thing is when I unplugged my network cable I got my mouse back and disconnected from their site - seems everything works fine now but I sure hope they weren't trying to put sypware or root kit on my computer. they will hear from if I find anything. piss off microsoft - what are you now keeping people that don't run your os from your web site. Did you know that the first knights in Medieval times were actually Negroid? Indeed, the word "knight" comes from the Old English "niht" meaning night or darkness. As time progressed, more and more Caucasians were accepted into this sacrosanct brotherhood, but many historians agree that, while King Arthur was definitely a white man, his entire round table of knights were exclusively colored! I'm gambling that Apple is expecting to keep profit margins up by keeping return/repair rates extremely low by using quality components i need dank nugs, smoke roach bugs, bird-man lugs, tree smokin thugs, i'm on a mission to secure a blunt, don't be pullin no bogartin' stunt, hoardin that shit ain't really kind, absorb that herb into yo mind, smokin' and tokin' until you're blind, what out for 5-0 or you gonna get fined All this "linux dependabilty uptime unix lol" bullshit is just that, a crock of shit. How fucking hard is it to hit a goddamn reset button, you fat fucking sysadmins? I realize your just about to hit level 87 in everquest and you're already sweating from reaching for that jolt cola but for the love of god PLEASE stop using these stupid, unusable operating systems! My favorites: Maxell 80 Minute Pro (blue) for solid robust low end, detail and clean immediacy; Maxell Music 80 minute gold for a balanced hight-to-mid-to-bottom and wide sparkle; Fuji 80 Minute Audio for a wetter sound (smoothes out the edges). Memorex Music 80 minutes is very nice, Taiyo Yuden 700 MB are close, the Mitsui and BASF are in there, Sony could be better... Ecstasy, also known as MDMA, is popular in raves as a drug that promotes tolerance. An empathogen, ecstasy gives its user heightened acceptance towards other people. Why not use this power to pacify racists? My idea calls for the forced injection of MDMA into racists, or risk the loss of property. After developing an initial addiction to ecstasy, users will be required to fuel their addiction by purchasing more of the substance. Government-run vendors can sell their wares to give wealth back to minority communities. This scheme will allow the racists to become normal, productive members of society while putting more money in the hands of those that need it the most. Don't the greedy boneheads at Thompson Multimedia and Fraunhofer Gesellschaft see that they are poisoning their own water supply by causing the Open Source community to develop better, and free, codecs like Ogg Vorbis? So there I was zipping through the skies of Iraq in a helicopter my associates had rented from Blackpool. We had been sweating it out as we were forced to maintain a low altitude to stay under the AAF radar, which kept us safe from missile batteries but exposed us to any ground troops we happened across. We were almost home free to the green zone, when we heard the telltale WHOOSH! of a shoulder-mounted ground-to-air missile. The pilot screamed and in a flash we were spiraling out of control and the ground was rushing up to meet us. When I came to, I thought I must be in heaven, because the wind was gently rustling the green grass that seemed to be cushioning me. I smiled at the feeling of the warm sun upon my face. Then the Arabic men came. While a thin wiry one waved his rifle and screamed unintelligibly at me, one of the fat ones pulled me up by the hair to my knees and unzipped his khaki reliefs. Out sprung the largest cock I've ever seen on a dark-skinned man. It smelled of couscous and camels, and when he forced it down my throat I could taste a hint of Brut. They all took turns throat-raping me, and they all had a good laugh when my screams abruptly stopped as one of the larger cocks dislocated my larynx from my throat down into my stomach and I began to bleed from my nose and ears. After they were all satisfied, they pointed their barrels at me and I felt hot lead tearing through my body. As I lay prone on the ground, just before I blacked out, I felt something hot on my back and realized that the fat one was urinating all over my broken American corpse ohh yeah i was going through the logs in my toilet today and i found a letter. i don't remember eating a letter. funny thing is.. it was a letter from my colon telling me to eat less fiber. ps: i'm shutting down until you have sex with men. after plowing the fields of the nearest 12 guys i could find, my brother walks into the room. he says, "haha jokes on you i put that note in your turd. you just fucked a bunch of dudes for nothing, homo!" this is why i hate procreation. girl, you must be from stdout because i'd like to pipe you We've got Justice Kennedy writing decisions based upon international law, not the Constitution of the United States? That's just outrageous. And not only that, but he said in session that he does his own research on the Internet? That is just incredibly outrageous. is it gay that sometimes when i take a shit i get goosebumps all over my body? You sick, sick butthole licking UNIX fags. How DARE you use the disgusting and fecal OS that is Linux. Windows is BEST! You fags get raped in the mind by Tux. His fag penguin guise makes you shreik out in terror for Windows, but he fuckes you so much you are forced to use Linux. I bet the fags who reply to this are being ass raped as we speak. Linux is buggy, slow, bloated and turns you into a fag. Windows is best! You huge fruits and your lies about bill games must cease. YOU KNOW, YOU NEEDLE-DICKED PANSIES COWER IN FEAR WHEN I WHIP MY TOWERING CYCLOPS OUT. MY PENIS CONSUMES LIGHT AND WHOLE ASTEROIDS LIKE THEY WERE NOTHING. ONE TIME I GOT AN ERECTION AND WELL THAT CAUSED A WHOLE GALAXY TO BE SHATTERED BY THE SHEER FORCE. WHEN I EJACULATE IT CAUSES THE GRAVITATIONAL CONSTANT OF THE UNIVERSE TO BE ALTERED BECAUSE OF THE SUDDEN INCREASE IN MASS. AT THE END OF TIME THERE WILL BE NOTHING LEFT IN THE UNIVERSE BUT DARK MATTER AND MY PENIS. MY PENIS EXISTS IN FOUR DIMENSIONS, EXPANDING OUTWARD AT LIGHT SPEED LIKE TIME ITSELF. MY PENIS COMPOSES THE UNIVERSE AND TICKLES AZATHOTH'S OMNIPOTENT BUNGHOLE WHEN THE STARS ARE RIGHT. ENTROPY IS BUT A FART IN THE WIND FOR MY PENIS. MY PENIS CAN BREAK MATHEMATICS! IT IS ABLE TO TRANSCEND REALITY AND DESTROY HUMAN THOUGHT WITH ITS SHEER VOLUME AND MASS. MY PENIS HAS A PENIS, AND THAT PENIS IS STILL BIGGER THAN YOUR PENIS. Remember the Alamo! Shoot 'em! To show you how radical I am, I want carjackers dead. I want rapists dead. I want burglars dead. I want child molesters dead. I want the bad guys dead. No court case. No parole. No early release. I want 'em dead. Get a gun and when they attack you, shoot 'em. I use Firefox sometimes, but it really isn't that good. I'd rathewr use IE than Firefox because who knows what these open-source people can do with your credit card numbers. Not that Microsoft needs anymore money, so they won't try to scab it off me. And at least they patch their browser automatically with Automatic Updates I'm saying to all the rappers keep it real. Not everyone on your road crew likes pussy and you know it. The stylists that lean in your face, do your make up, braid your hair may just have your body guards dick on his breath - while he is all in yo grill. picture yourself at college. she's the foreign exchange student from ... not china, the other one. in any case her english is poor and she laughs at even your shittiest jokes without understanding. you know she likes you. the only guys after her are skinny adenoidal fags that she gets enough of back home. she laughs at their jokes too, but it's not them she sits by in class, you come to associate that class with the smell of her. late one night you're in the library. she's there because you're there. you take her skinny wrist and wordlessly lead her to the carousel you booked. there are cameras, and neither of you care. her breathing flutters and she looks elsewhere as you pull her close. you slide a hand down there, gliding on silken skin. she leaks like a swollen sponge that has absorbed all it can. she's never been fucked in a library before. but she's never met anyone as big and black as you before. You know how sometimes when you poop, it's a blue color? Well, I had one of those poops on Friday because I had been eating artificially colored animal crackers. After pinching a couple out, I thought it would be funny to trick my girlfriend. I placed them on the coffee table and told her they were novelty candies. Before I could tell her I was just joking, she took a bite! Well, after a long weekend in the hospital, my girlfriend died of spinal meningitis. God's going to punish me for this one, I just know it. Check this shit out. Sucks pubic hair from your furniture and sextoys without stopping every 5 minutes to douche. The Dyson DC 14 Animal features a telescopic vibrating dildo that instantly releases semen 17 feet at the touch of a vein. In addition, the DC 14 Animal features a wide vagina that picks up large hookers that other trick ass niggas leave behind. A mini turbine head-sucking dog and cat combination saves you from tight spaces like ass, pussy or lips and a low reach faggot tool simplifies the task of felching under pressure. The DC 14 Animal also features a carpet care kit to keep your camel toe looking like new. Available at your local zoo. If Jesus was Jewish, then why did he have a Puerto Rican name? You Stupid Faggots. Dear Sir,With due respect and humility I am writing this mail letter to you which I believe that this letter will not embarrassed you as we have not met or seen each other before.My name is Pastor Steve Camara, from republic of Benin in west Africa region, pastor in charge of Revival Church Of God Mission (RCGM) here in Abidjan Cote D' Ivoire.I am writing you in regards of money transfer which late Pope John Paul II reviewed to me a week ago before his death through feeding tube after his long ill health, that his late wife who is Mrs. Esther Benson deposited the sum of US$ Million Dollars) with a finance house here in Abidjan for the two (2) remaining children PAUL III AND MARY for there future.Before the death of Pope John Paul II he told me that this money US$ Dollars wasacquired genuinely, that his late wife has a diamond shop in there country which was destroyed during the war that leads to his husband death two year ago through heart attack.It is because of the confidence he had on me as his pastor, he told me about this deposit and his last request to me before his final breat is that I should try as much as I can to look for foreigner, either individual, company or organisation who can handle this transaction with care and confidence for the future of her two children that is presently staying with me as there parents for now as she cannot make it for them.Finally, if this letter touches your heart and you are willing to be of assistance to this two children, I will like you to indicate your full interest to enable me give you more details on how to proceed with this transfer. Also note that all the deposit document of this money was on this woman name as the beneficiary that made with the finance house here.Expecting your urgent mail to this effect.Thanks and remain bless. that is the nerdiest thing i have ever seen aside from my girlfriend and i wearing matching firefox tshirts girl, you must be in the kkk because i think we'll have a lot of fun once we get under the sheets Girl, you must be Snort because I'd like to trigger your intrusion detection systems I'm going to be taking a long vacation in a couple months and I want to take a sheet of acid over with me. I'd really rather not bring it with me on the plane as I've seen the security measures at the airport I'll be flying to and they're pretty strict, so I was thinking of faxing it over before hand. Anyone know if this would work? girl, you must be grand theft auto: san andreas because once i get inside of you i'm going to do all sorts of illegal things girl, you must be tiger woods because no matter what you do, you'll still just be a nigger girl, you must be a dialup internet connection because every time i want to do something useful on the phone i have to shut you up girl you must be an o'reilly technical manual because despite your high price tag, you never say anything meaningful girl you must be charles barkley because i want to take you to the hole but i doubt you would be impressed with my full-court press girl, you must be a rare warez release because after i get my hands on you, i'm going to pass you off to all of my friends Did you know? Timothy McVeigh conspired with Terry Nichols to destroy the Alfred P. Murrah Federal Building by exchanging messages using the popular "Bit Torrent" internet program, which quickly and anonymously allows users to exchange large volumes of confidential documents. ###### REFUSE RACISM & POLITICAL GARBAGE ON OSS #######UBUNTO IS AN ANTI-WHITE RACIST OS FUNDED BY AN AFRICAN-AMERICAN WHO USES LINUX TO THROW HIS AFRICAN PROPAGANDA DOWN OUR COLLECTIVE THROATS!!REFRAIN FROM ABUSING OSS TO PEDAL POLITICAL PROGANDA!HAVING AN OS THAT PEDALS MULTICULTURALISM, MISCEGENATION AND INTERRACIAL RELATIONS IS THE EQUAL OF AN 'ANTI-JEW OS BUILD' - UNNACEPTABLE, DISGUSTING AND ANTI-OPEN SOURCE.MR AMERICAN BLACK SUPREMACIST - OPENSOURCE DOES NOT NEED *NOR WANTS* YOUR MONEY.###### REFUSE RACISM & POLITICAL GARBAGE ON OSS ####### Punctuation marks that look like smiley faces express happiness on a new communication tool known as "Internet." The computer network is already being used by 15 million people worldwide to chat or do important research. Did you know: Google Inc. was the original corporate investor in 50 Cent's career, advancing him $15,000 to produce his first album "Get Rich Or Die Tryin" (Interscope 2003). 50 Cent gave Google a grateful nod when he named his side group "G-Unit" (Google Unit), and they maintain a healthy business relationship to this day. Russel Simmons is truely a hero amongst us. He owns his own music label, shoe company, and even a clothing line, rightfully named PHAT FARM! The clothes are hand stitched together by hundreds of obese naked women sitting in tubs of sperm. Their only form of payment is cunnilingus performed by farm animals, hence the clothing name! Simmons is a brilliant man! alright im not a freak lyk you....i dont put little periods after my sentences..aportophes in my sentences or fricking commas :-D so i'd say you back the fuck off because your the kind of person NOBODY likes cuz your a fatass loser with no friends and is a stuck up freak:-) girl you must be the warp core of the starship enterprise because if you ever start acting up i will dump you All the guys in this IRC channel I hang out in are really profane and gross. They talk about child porn and act racist a lot of the time, and every night before I go to bed I pray for God's forgiveness, and for God to forgive them. Then I remember I'm wiccan. Blessed be! Can anyone tell me how many times these high and mighty evolution scientists have already backpedalled and changed their version of the truth to fit some new finding? I've already lost the count... pathetic, really. I am amazed at all the scientists who think they know "facts" when their theories are not really anything more then a "best guess". And their guesses care changing all the time. God's story has not changed at all. I believe we should teach creationism in schools, it will serve more people better. Out of a high school graduation class of 1000, how many will go on to a career in science? Say that 700 of them go on to college and that 300 go into the work force. Of the 700, 100 decide they want to major in physics or chemistry. Of them 70 get weeded out. You now have 30 people who will continue. The other 970 people will be better served with an education that focuses on creationism. We are living in a time with relative ethics. We are living in an increasing secular society, where life means little. We all watched in horror as the Teri Shiavo in Florida was starved to death. That never should have happened, in the light that there is information that her husband might have beat her the night she collapsed, and the uncertainty of her wishes. Even our most prized and well written scientists believe in God. Einstein believed in God, he was quoted as saying "I want to know God's thoughts, the rest are just details". Growing up in the Deep South you are exposed hunting and trapping at an early age. I will never forget the time my father got so drunk on Robitussin that after beating me repeatedly with a rake he went outside to place traps to ensnare wild animals that we could use for food. After a few ours of stalking about he came inside and found me lying on the floor half conscious he chastised me for being a little wuss and kicked me in the kidneys claiming while shouting something about Jesus before passing out on the kitchen floor. The next morning the department of fish and game came knocking at our door asking if we knew anything about the bear traps that were placed all over the apartment complex. Apparently he had ensnared several negroes, and, while it was negro season, he was over his bag limit and had to cut some of them loose. Man, those were the days, sipping lemonade on the porch while dad skinned niggers in the back yard. girl you must be a game of texas holdem cuz i just wanna go all in You can't talk that way about EverQuest you fag! OMG Just you wait till I pry my ass out of this chair and lose 400 lbs to climb out of my parents basement, asshole! You're are SO getting prank called! I watched this whole program on National Geographic entitled 'The Dark Side of Dolphins' and let me tell you, dolphins are total assholes. So here's the deal, male dolphins travel in packs of two. These males want to get laid, and so they trap a female between them and keep her captive for up to a month, having sex with her as they please. If she tries to get away, they will beat her with their snouts and fins. When you see large groups of them it's just a bunch of these two packs of males joining together to keep captive a few females so that they can gang rape her. The females hate it and try to get away but then get beaten up. If and when the female gives birth she won't want to have sex while protecting her young, and so males will gang up and try in some instatnces to kill the baby inorder to have sex with the mother. Bottom line, dolphins are assholes. According to marine biolgoists dolphins could have normal courtship and sex, but the males choose not to they prefer gang rape. Dolphins are assholes. what did you have for breakfasT? your mom? what did you have for lunch your dad? .. what did you eat between that a fucking pig fuck man eww ur so nasty whatcha gunna eat for supper your fucking neighbors family and all your fucking pets I AM GOING TO SHIT IN YOUR OWN ASS SO FAR IT COMES OUT OF YOUR MOUTH WHICH I WILL THEN SWALLOW AND THEN SHIT INTO YOUR MOUTH SO YOU WILL BE EATING MY SHAT SHIT WHILE SHITTING. girl you must be my shitty internet service provider because you're going to kick me off of you after approximately 5 hours I am a nose-picker. I cannot stand having crunchy snot clinging to the insides of my nostrils, or feeling something dangling there in the back. So I dig it out. I'm also like this about cleaning my ears; I cannot stand feeling that there's something in there. Yuck. A bonus to all this is that I get a slight rush of euphoria when I dig out a really big booger, or find a lot of wax in my ear. It's similar to the rush of having squeezed out a prize-winning poop. girl you must be OSX because you're beautiful and alluring but mostly worthless any 1 got the move tripple x with vin deasal, not pr0n girl you must be a free porn website, because after one 10 minute visit i'll never see you again girl, you must be internet explorer because you give me popups all the time girl you must be a hydroponic grow system because i cant wait to introduce my seeds girl you must be a micro$oft product because when i find your holes i'm going to exploit them girl you must be java bytecode because you let me use you anywhere I want girl you must be a .bin with no .cue file because I have to wrangle with you for hours only be burned in the end girl u must be an NES cartridge because i will blow on your slot until you start functioning girl you must be ieee-1284 because i can tell that your port is bidirectional girl u must be aol instant messenger because i'd like to see all of my buddies on you thats why i prefer anime hentai then real porn.... majority of porn is usally ugly both the body and faces its rare which you dont get the ugly (usally comes with alot of air brushing)... and its usally the non nude models which offer something close to hentai in cuteness/hot and non-old porn models. fuck shit bitch ass tits. Lets suck some cock get knocked up and pass out in a ditch. 9911 emergency room party. smoke dat hanger into yo womb. <3 my mom had so many abortions im surprised im not in a jar of formaldehyde <3 you dumb fucking p r e g g e r s BREAKING NEWS: THE RING-LEADER OF THE INFAMOUS INTERNATIONAL PEDOPHILE RING "THE CATHOLIC CHURCH" HAS DIED, HE WAS 84. I leaned down and smelled the seat where the super hot girls amazing ass sat for at least 5 minutes straight... It smelled like pure girl farts... a strong fart essence was present in the felt padded seat cushion, I started buggin out. I kept smelling the cushion for as long as the smell's odor retained it's embodiment. I was in heaven with the sexy fumes that only lasted a couple of minutes. I buried my face into the seat cushion smelling this HOT girls candy farts. I was so happy that day. For like several years I have been afflicted with a really smelly crotch. It's like I sweat a lot down there and it just has a really sweaty vaginal odor. I bathe regularly but nothing really helps; by the end of the day I always smell funky. This wouldn't gross me out if it was just an occasional problem, but it happens every day. What can I do? girl you must be a sata2 hard drive because you are modestly increasing my pipe girl you must be a 0day topsite because I just wanna max out your slots You should connect your graphics card directly to the mains. You can buy molex connectors from any good electronics store and then splice it into the lead from a hair dryer or toaster. This should deliver the correct voltage direct to your graphics card (the molex also functions as a voltage regulator and AC rectifier). It's the equivalent of having an Antex 3kW power supply. girl you must be haggis cause you make me want to stuff you with old meat Ladies and gentlemen, against my better judgement, I allowed my teenage son to install line-ucks on our compaq presario. Now I can't make heads or tales of what's happening on my computer machine, and he is continously making disrespectful remarks about Bill Gates and 'Micro$uck". I guess my only real question is: How long should I ground him, removing all access to his friends and activities in order to cull this anti-social behavior? ONE TIME I GRABBED A FAT GOTHIC BITCH BY THE EARS AND SLAMMED HER GODDAMNED HEAD AGAINST THE TABLE AND YELLED, "WHY ARE YOU SO GODDAMNED FAT AND UGLY?!! WHY!!! WHY!!! WHY!!!" AND WHEN SHE STARTED TO CRY AND MADE HER WHITE CLOWN FACE PAINT RUN AND ALL THAT THICK BLACK EYE LINER I SAID, "IF YOU ARE SO FUCKING FAT WHY THE HELL DO YOU WEAR ALL THAT GODDAMNED SLUTY CLOTHES YOU FAT FUCKING BITCH?!!!" yo think if i got a real doll and had a voodoo priest do shit to it, and attached lindsay lohan's soul to it, that if fucked it she'd feel it and shit? My Nazi fetish makes my boyfriend uncomfortable.I NEED ADVICE. You appear to be experienced in these matters, so I'll give this a try.My boyfriend told me that he finds my Irma Grese/ Ilse Koch-style Third Reich dominatrix costumes to be disturbing; he seems reluctant to participate in Lebensborn roleplaying and even Auschwitz guard/ male prisoner roleplaying. He also suggested gently that I take down the Hitler Youth propaganda posters that are currently hanging over my bed.Is Nazism a 'turnoff'? If so, why? It is well known that apes are close relatives to human beings. What isn’t so well known is just how close relatives the two species are. Apes and humans share much of the same DNA. For instance, the North African Short-Haired Baboon shares over 99 of its DNA with mankind. This particular species is highly adaptable and like chimpanzees, they are able to make crude tools and even utilize rudimentary communication skills. The adaptability of the North African Short hair is evidenced by their lives in captivity, while most species dwindle on extinction and have trouble breeding; the Short-Hairs thrive, often neglecting their offspring, food gathering, and even grooming themselves in order to mate with females. First introduced into captivity sometime in the 1700’s, the North African Short-Haired baboon was utilized as laborers in small farming communities. Today, they enjoy life in urban centers, often living 10 to a den. Sadly, captivity and inbreeding has caused their learning ability to be suppressed and their baser instincts to be more pronounced. Often, they will rely on the gatherings of other species to survive. Utilizing their natural nocturnal abilities, they stalk, undetected, through the habitats of these other species, procuring what it necessary to survive from them, often in the form of Televisions and Hi-top sneakers. Making headlines across America is the Terri Shiavo case. This poor woman is in a persistent vegetative state and the husband selfishly wishes for her feeding tube to be left removed. This is appalling, not to just me, but to the many Americans that feel she should be allowed to live. is a prime example. The husband seems to be missing the larger picture here, she is still biologically functional, meaning that her vaginal orifice is capable of self-lubrication even if she is unresponsive. This make her the perfect mate. True, she cannot perform fellatio, she is more than capable of being a semen receptacle for the husband that has loved her for years. Please stop this madness and contribute to her cause! Today, they enjoy life in urban centers, often living 10 to a den. Sadly, captivity and inbreeding has caused their learning ability to be suppressed and their baser instincts to be more pronounced. Often, they will rely on the gatherings of other species to survive. Utilizing their natural nocturnal abilities, they stalk, undetected, through the habitats of these other species, procuring what it necessary to survive from them, often in the form of Televisions and Hi-top sneakers. My partner and I were having intercourse when his penis came out and we heard a weird sort of pop noise and then he experienced a lot of pain and when he looked at his penis he noticed there was some blood coming out of the tip. After about 5 minutes there wasn't pain anymore, but because of hte blood I am afriad it's broken. Thoughts? hey everyone remember that one time when klerck shot himself directly in the face with a shotgun and killed himself and we all were like "whoa" and he was like "drip drip"... that shit was awesome girl you must be an internet forum because i am about to try and impress you using my stale in jokes from 1998 I need a patient guy who will realize that I am just flustered when I belt out something stupid when I am nervous like "your such a cute little guy" on a first date. never heard from him again, hha. whatever. girl you must be a taxidermy lab because you make me want to stuff a cock in you Intel isn't bad, but AMD's is just misleading. If I'm building a 64-bit AMD system and I look and say "Hey, it's an AMD 64 4000+! That must mean it's 4000MHz which is 4GHz" Oh no! It's only 2.4GHz. At least Intel has the sense to put the processor speed right in the name of the chip. I know someone is going to chime in and bring up some obscure reason why the 2.4GHz is called the "4000+" and declare it's there for more than a marketing ploy, but Joe Consumer isn't going to think that. An AMD-64 4000+" sounds wayyyy cooler than an "Intel-64 2.8GHz", right?Now, proceed to mod me down because I speak ill of the underdog, right? Go on, I know you want to inject your bias into moderation, it's okay. I, personally, have a special connection to the video "Basic Training: San Francisco Style." It was my bridge from Fisting to Scat. There is a scene in it where a pretty young blonde boy (who I later learned was Dave, himself) gets fisted with a very full ass. Needless to say it gets wonderfully messy. I was so disgusted I couldn't stop watching it. I must have nearly worn out that spot on the tape. Basically my question to you is based on everything you've seen concerning the character of Bardock and Goku, what would happen if Goku had an actual meeting with his father? What words would they exchange? What would cause such a meeting, etc? It can be any continuity you choose. Now that you know what to write about, be creative and come up with what in your view would happen if father and son were to meet. girl, you must be an einstein-rosen bridge because i'd like to come inside of you and then be somewhere else I'm all about girls who have dicks coming out of their nipples with dicks also coming out of those dicks and shit coming out of those dicks YOU SPICAROONIS HAVE A WHOLE DAMN COUNTRY SO WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT WITH OURS? ONCE YOU FILTHY FUCKS FINISH YOUR SILENT INVASION DO YOU THINK THIS WILL STILL BE THE AMERICA IT ONCE WAS? FUCK NO. YOU FILTHY BEANERS WILL TURN IT INTO ONE BIG FUCKING BARRIO LIKE YOU HAVE DONE TO THAT PIECE OF SHIT MEXICO BECAUSE YOU BEAN EATERS ARE TOO FUCKING STUPID TO RUN A FUCKING COUNTRY.YOU BEANERS TOOK OVER CALIFORNIA AND TEXAS. AND WE FUCKING GAVE YOU NEW MEXICO. SO KEEP YOUR FILTHY ASSES THERE AND JUST HAVE THAT SHIT AND STAY THE FUCK OUT OF THE REST OF THE COUNTRY. YOU HAVE YOUR WHOLE SO CALLED COUNTRY DOWN THERE AND THREE BIG FUCKING STATES. BUT YOU FUCKERS REPRODUCE FASTER THAN RABBITS AND HAVE MORE DAMN RELATIVES THAN A COCKROACH. AND ARE TWICE AS FILTHY. SO I GUESS YOU NEED MORE ROOM. SHIT YOU PACK 50 OF YOU BEANERS INTO A 2 BEDROOM APARTMENT SO YOU SHOULD BE ABLE TO MAKE DO WITH THOSE FUCKING STATES.DAMN I HATE TACO MUNCHERS. When you see porn and your dick gets hard, try to touch your dick head with your lips. I have licked many times my cockhead in this way. Hey guys, if a Jedi perchance met the Wolverine in armed combat, who do you think would win? Could Wolverine's mind resist the Force? Could the Jedi's lightsaber cut through Adamantium? Discuss. i think i may have roids but i don't know what they look like and i don't have anything protruding out of my ass. everytime i go poop there is a little blood on the toilet paper when i wipe. its not super painful and pretty much feels like minor irritation. my buttcrack has been really dry and flaky too almost like my crack wants to get deeper. wtf? i've been using preperation h suppositories and the medicated pads for weeks now but nothing has helped. i don't have money or insurance to see a doctor so if anyone has had symptoms like this plz tell me what the hell is wrong with me and what i can do to fix this. thx. A romantic dinner with a large table cloth so you can go under the table in the retaurant and blow me without the other customers seeing what you are doing. Not that i am ashamed but I am just thinking of your dignity and all. I'd like to get her on a bed, rip off her pants and her grannie underwear that I just know she wears and then I'd like to flip her over and spread those fat smelly cheeks apart, shove peanut butter in her bunghole, stick my tongue in there and move it around like I am having an epileptic fit eating the creamy treat from her ass. I'd also like to choke her by shoving my schlong down her throat to the point where she is gonna pass out and then pull out my cock and jerk off on her face while she is still delerious and then squirt all over her cute face. Not following the chat room rules will at the least get you a reprimand or, at the worst, kicked or removed from the chat room. The Operators are here to assist and make sure the chat room is a fun and friendly place to visit. Channel Operators are not guards, but they take their jobs seriously. In the event of unacceptable or disruptive behavior, you will be asked to leave the room. it's time for lunch. you'd like to chow. Fraid I've got some bad news right now. The fridge a box of empty space, no sign of eats, not e'en a trace, oh how you'd like a tiny taste, your stomach hurts, you find some Certs, they're gobbled, gone, but breath is fresh, you're nearing death, you're flailing on the kitchen floor, no more! just make the hunger leave, your stomach grieves a SNACK you NEED you've GOT TO FEED YOUR CHEETOS ARE ALL GONE OH GOD YOU'RE SORTING THROUGH THE TRASH: A WAD! USED PAPER NAPKINS QUICK, YOU LICK! DELISH but what a TEASE just PLEASE I need some CHIPS you weakly WHEEZE try empty KETCHUPs upside DOWN you LICK THE CRUMBS right off the GROUND it's LUNCH LUNCH LUNCH and YOU MUST CHOW the trickling sweat drops off your BROW from FRIDGE to SINK you madly DASH where did you hide that CHEETO STASH O! during LAST WEEK's ENterPRISE you ATE THOSE CHEETOS not so WISE so AS A DESPERATE LAST RESORT you GNAW your left hand's ugly WART the TASTY FLAKES of DEAD DRY SKIN have turned this LOSS into a WIN but STOMACH LETS his anGER KNOWN it GRUMBLES IN AN ANGRY TONE a FAT GEEK HUNGRY ALL ALONE--HELP HELP THE FOOD ! THERE IS NONE HERE! EMPTY BOTTLES OF CHEAP-ASS BEER YOU WRITHE ALONG THE GROUND AND FLOP! RELEASE THOSE BOWELS WITH A *PLOP* oh GROSS YOU SMOOSH the TURDS so WARM and with a FBLURT out trickles MORE but crazed you are. in NEED OF EAT you reach and get some BROWN POO-MEAT. YOUR SHIT ALL OVER HANDS AND FACE YOUR TONGUE AFLAME WITH POOPY TASTE the DOOR swings WIDE: NERD FRIENDS, a BUNCH "Hey, Asimov! WE BROUGHT YOU LUNCH :O" your mom is so fat that if planck's constant were 1 Js, she STILL wouldn't be able to quantum tunnel through a potential of any significance i had a great time last night. thanks for tying me up with carpenters rope around my mantits and through the crack of my asshole and then facefucking me while pouring candle wax all over my areolas, your spiked-toe boots digging into my side while i am on all fours, back arched like a frightened cat, begging for mercy as the thick bands of the rope run back and forth teasing my grundel and burning my semen-encrusted pubic hairs, the smell so engulfing i vomited all over your bed and then you vomited all over me and then i shit myself and the rope made it split into two streams all over your knees, running down to your ankles and toenails. i'd love to do it thursday night again! You give liberals a bad name. You give women a bad name. You give fucking everyone who has the title "HUMAN BEING" a bad name.Go outside once in a while and stop stuffing your bloated mouth with stale cheetos and flat mountain dew. You might feel sexy in that thong but that thick and musty smell wafting up your crotch proves that the best thing you could do for your sex appeal is to do your laundry, and maybe take a damn bath.Tap, tap, tap, your keyboard receives your idle, insipid wanderings. People care! you tell yourself. Just look at your comments. There...are a few of them. Proving that someone reads your drivel even when you post 5 pathetic little vignettes about a tediously pedestrian life in a single day.teh_enchantress. A pleasingly clever mixture of an internet in-joke and fantasy archetype? Or a slavish parroting of the same tired memes that lonely boys and girls use to try to find a place on an internet that refuses no one, least of all pedophiles and hate groups?I know, I know. It's something to do when you get to your room. YOu know, after a long trip to the bathroom, or having lunch with your mom, or going out with your other fat friends. You can come back to your computer and rant about how outrageous your recent bland adventures were.Well, do yourself and the world a favor. Shut the fuck up forever, you wanna-be slut. Your opinions aren't worth listening to, your life isn't interesting, you aren't attractive. Live some of life and meet some human beings. You're a social bulemic and you've been binging on the paper thin personas of your internet friends, most of whom are probably overweight engineers working at IBM in sexually frustrating marraiges.You think you'll look back on this time of your life and laugh? I dare say you'll look back and your lips will become a thin bloodless line as you realize what a fucking waste it was. The relationships you could have had. The friends you thought you made.And please avoid any real issues. Your understanding of any political or social problems in the world is about as thick as your hymen after you popped your cherry with a hello kitty dildo you bought while tittering on instant messenger with your friends. Wau~~~ so cute. You fucking shallow little wretch.In short, you are a female piece of refuse. The cigarette butt that your parents smoked for the love they thought you could give them, and then had stamped out as soon as they realized what a piece of shit had erupted from your mother's vagina, which happens to be rather overly-familiar in your neighborhood. Just shut the fuck up. Get out of that goddamn chair in which you've spent so many needless hours.I guarantee that unless you do something drastic, you should acknowledge that this is truly as good as it will ever get. Because from this point on you'll begin to realize the gossamer nature of any joy you might have thought you were feeling--and that infintely deep well of loneliness will erupt so sharply it'll cut your wrists.No, you're not complex. You're not deep and you're not thoughtful. The pain torturing you isn't inscrutable and your problems are not unresolvable. You're just stupider than you think, and that will always frustrate you. You know you're not attractive, but your tenuous grip on self-worth demands a lie. And your decrepit social life has the prospects of a bumblebee in a Scandinavian September.Good luck doing the unlikely. Some steps to help you on the way: plan your diet, start working out, find a hobby, and read the newspaper. That is all. Now go back to what you do best, which is apparently poking your nose into others business because you're too bored with your own life. *pets joo* We're the math nerds. Uh huh, that's us. Our glasses are thick; our skin bleeding pus. Chalkboards are out and computers are in... Mathmatica, dude! WTF have you been? We're crunching some primes while chatting on forums; Star Trek and Star wars; the Great Pauly Shore--Um, this math problem's simple to solve, can't you see? You need to brush up on your pi, roots, and e. The nigger is a subhuman monkey, ape, Fat lips, kinky hair, VIOLENT, RAPIST, SMALL BRAIN (have you noticed how dumm most niggers are)and broad monstrous noses, car jacking saucer-lipped, ignorant fecal colored, ghetto-living, welfare-leeching, crack-smoking, hub-cap stealing. fried-chicken and biscuit eating, watermelon-stealing, 6-yr-old-white-girl-shooting, serial-killing, rapist, robber, murderer, adulterer, liar, fat-assed, white-woman-wanting, loud-radio-at-2:00-a.m.-in-the-morning-playing, undisciplined, tree-swinging, flat-congo-nosed, greasy afro-sheen, baggy-pants, and side-ways cap-wearing, maya angelou-reading, Jesse Jackson-worshiping, Al Sharpton, Louis Farrakhan and Malcum X-believing, disco doo-wop playing, non-athletic, non-musical, shoplifting, non-political, trashy, nasty, filthy, junk-around-the-house and litter-in-the-yard-keeping, incestuous, hoe-beating, unfaithful, dice-shooting, numbers-playing, lottery-wishing, roach-and-rat raising, lice-keeping, crab-farming, graffiti-tagging, gang-banging, drive-by shooting, corner-hanging, unemployed, VCR, television, and radio-pawning, cardboard-box-under the-bridge-living, pork-rib three times-a-day-eating, buck-toothed, knock-kneed, semi-bald, illiterate, cross-eyed, get-it-up-so-you-can-masturbate-to-gay-porn, viagra-taking, connection-frequenting, jungle-visiting, cock-kissing AfroInfectedDickSucking, spawn of a fat, greasy, nasty, sweaty, unwashed slutty bitch whore that should never be trusted or allowed to free range in Human areas. Would you leave an otherwise perfect relationship if you found out your partner was interested in children sexually? There was this one time when I was so constipated from lack of proper diet and opiate abuse that I strained so hard I passed out and hit my head on the bathtub. I guess my bowels released when I was unconscious because I was awakened by my dog licking a mixture of blood and feces from my swollen and prolapsed rectum. To this day the muscles are so atrophied that I must wear a special harness to keep my bowels from spilling into my rubber underwear. WELCUM TO MY CHANNEL ON MIRC. READ DA RULES.TXT OR FACE A CONSEUQENCE!! RATIO FTPz ONLY 0DAY 0HOUR 0LAMENIZ. DOWNLOADIN FILES OF DA INTANET. SUME1 SEND ME A KEEJEN FOR DIS PROGGIEZ. ANYONE WANT TO SHAR PUBZ?????????? my brother raped me when i was 6 Does anyone else find it ironic that, as your virtual character gains experience, wealth and social stature, your reality character is losing the exact same things at the same rate? The night begins, so sets the sun, but chatting now has just begun. T'will yet be hours ere I am done, for I'm the chat world's favorite son. Although by day I am made fun (they say that I weigh nigh a ton, they say ten feet I cannot run), sour regrets; I have yet none. They may laugh and they may shun, but words cannot match my shotgun; as fast and far as they may run, I'll pick them all off one by one. Fuck my ass 'till my ass is filled. Thrust that cock up to the hilt. Ours is the house that Shepard built; all cocks hard and none shall wilt! Splatter your jizz all over my face. Rub it on in like grade school paste. To my ass your cock has laid waste; Mom still thinks that I am chaste ;) Blog People (or their subclass who are interested in computers and the glorification of information) have a fanatical belief in the transforming power of digitization and a consequent horror of, and contempt for, heretics who do not share that belief. Given the quality of the writing in the blogs I have seen, I doubt that many of the Blog People are in the habit of sustained reading of complex texts. It is entirely possible that their intellectual needs are met by an accumulation of random facts and paragraphs. they call me the King, of downloading THings, got bandwidth like no one on Earth. My modems are hot, but the warez I got, adds to my collecting-stuff mirth. I can't burn enough, CD's that are stuffed, with rars, zips, and tars of all kinds, but I must be strong, download all night long, ignore telltale OCD signs. Guys, what I don't get about plane crashes and falling elevator deaths is: why don't the victims just time it so that they jump straight up in the air right before the plane hits the ground? The jump would be a little high, yes, and you might break your ankle or even your leg, but isn't that better than getting smashed to smithereens? Me and my buddy were in downtown chicago and were walking to where he dad works and we came across this bum in the walkway. All fucking sprawled out across the sidewalk like it was his. My buddy pushed him with his foot and a couple 40 oz'ers rolled out from underneath him. Fucking lazy ass bum so I kicked him in the gut as hard as I could and he started puking up beer, corn, and something that looked like it came outta some gay dudes ass. Some security guard saw us and tried to chase us down but we were gone. Then I went to see my dad and go to GOLDS GYM to bench press!!!!! I like to show off that I freeball. I love to have my pants just so so I show major butt crack also when I am at a urinal at a rest stop or sport event I unzip and unbutton my shorts so that when I am pissing the shorts drop down and everyone can see my bare ass! I love the feeling of guys knowing i freeball. what do you guys do to show off? girl u must be because i would make up any ridiculous story just 2 be on u Seriously, I have the greatest respect for blacks. One of my best friends is African-American. These people put up with so much hardship, just like sufferers of Down's syndrome and mongoloidism. I'm just so proud they've earned their place in American society. why would I want to participate in your lousy conversation, you demagogue clown. i find no interest in you. you used to be a good friend of mine, and but you turned your back on me. you stabbed me right in the heart. the court has found you guilty. you have been sentenced to death. oh yeah you're such a dirty girl arent you year girl why dont you jack off daddy yeah take daddy's hard cock in your tiny little doll hands oh yeah that feels so good now jerk daddy's cock off back and forth you little whore oh yeah ur a very ugly jew thats thinks ur all that .. hope ur reading this cause u look like a fukin whore with that nazty ass makeup... U fukin peice of shit i hope ur dad rapes u till u cant move a muscle ... wat are u 14 and ur dads like 60... ur parents sure like to get it on ...Blink Blink...I hope u and ur jappy ass girl friends and boy friends die in hell where they will meet hitler and have some fun with him in bed .. if u kn ow what i mean Pudge Picnic : chubs on chubs with flab to spare. "No condoms!" yelled, but we don't care! Dude's be fucken, dudes be fucked, dudes be shittin, dudes be sucked. Writhing on the concrete floor, these chubs are sluts. They're obese whores! And gross! They've never taken baths. Too much chili! Awful gas!!! PENIS in BUTT. SPERM mixed FECES. FASTEN your SILVER COCK to my GOLDEN HOLE. My STOOL is the SATIN SHEET for your VISITING HARD-ON. Ejaculate RAPIDLY and REPEATEDLY on my BACK and ANKLES. DELICIOUS. a little squirt of doody came out when I was picking up that heavy jug of milk, when i took of my spideyman underoos to check it out there were little squiggly things in it.. they were moving : ( Holy lord you are being duped. Napster is really run by the MPAA and when you download the music it tracks you on a FEDERAL GOVERNMENT server and it begins to hack ur toonz. Then the service goes under and the files self destruct leaving your HDD as a pile of googabits. Cant you FOOLS see that this is just a plan to get you to JERK your DUMB NUTS while wearing ASSLESS CHAPS so that the MPAA hax ur data and enters ur base to kill ur doodz. If I see anyone using CRAPster or iCOONS i'll be sure to beat their head in using my engorged dong for their own safety ohh yeah. I cut myself because I find it an artform, just like tattoo's, but I LIKE cutting a beautiful drawing into myself, as I did it and I drew it. But I did cut along time ago so, that might be it. Anyway, I only cut when it fades and needs touching up, but it sure feels good! Sometimes I cut my penis when I get depressed...Unfortunatly, I managed to half-circumsize myself last night, after I got incredibly depressed about my girlfriend leaving me. I was devastated. In all the outcry against them, too many people are forgetting the contributions pedophile catholic clergymen have made to our society. Did you know that the term "Joshing" someone, meaning to kid actually comes from Joshua Fairbanks, an altar boy famous for believing Father Jacob Cooper's laughable claim that he could perform the miracle of transubstantiation if Joshua allowed him to ejaculate in the boy's mouth. ohh yeah Shut the fuck up, you fucking hippy. No one cares about the fact that you don't own a TV or think TV is only for idiots, or whatever other attitude your elitist comment is about. Take it to the coffee shop, asshole. Dr. Huxtable broke into the clinic and held me at gunpoint. I was his patient, in for my yearly pap smear. I couldn't believe it when he came in the door for the exam with a machete in his hands. He demanded that I take off my clothes, and begin to fellate him. He waved the machete around like a madman, so i complied. I was forced, at knife point, to take his entire penis into my mouth. Then I rubbed my clit and got off ohh yeah Dude's fucking dudes. Everybody on the floor. No condoms No condoms! yo what drugs u into? im all about the opiumnitrous / dxm / ketamine / acid / weed / hydrocodone / ultram / oxy / demerol / morphine / codeine / dihydrocodeine / heroin / mdma / salvia / 5-meo-dipt / 5-meo-amt / amt / rohypnol / ghb / mda / hash / kavakava / adderall / dexedrine / ritalin / ephedrine / caffeine / alcohol / cocaine / shrooms / tobacco / xanax / klonopin / valium / ambien / soma / flexeril / zanaflex / zoloft / paxil / ether / spraypaint / phenobarbital / ativan / air duster girl you must be alan greenspan because you have just raised my interest rate by several percentage points wiggle thatass.pop a tab and smoke a fatty. happy everyday until we crash at your dads. boom tisk in our ears and amphetamines in our blowjobs in the stalls to pay for $10 water.this moment will last and dad broke up because of me Again and again and again, I grow weary of junior high school English teachers trying to correct people's speech only because they encounter language forms they aren't familiar with. For the love of Mary, face it! Your English is only good enough to teach the average Mexican or Cambodian refugee to put together three-syllable words into coherent sentences used to beg for money, alcohol, drugs or shelter. Stop pretending you know English better than God and everyone else. Comprehend that the mere fact you were teaching English in the first place means that you weren't smart enough to do anything more productive and therefor your language skills are firmly confined to the mediocre. STFU. These goddamn trolls interrupting my flow. These niggas don't respek us with a +o. They gotta color spam and fake invite, bombing with asciis in yellow on white. Shit yeah. it's bright, you 12 year old kiddie. You ain't got pubes and you ain't seen titty. I'll jupe your chans and ban your ass. Don't message me with plz unban, your chance has passed! Other opers crappin up our relay net. Why haven't you delinked your 386 yet? ircd needs xeons and dual cpus. When it comes to irc hardware, you can't be a jew. Shit, nobody knows the trouble I've seen. On invites for websites with naked teens. Begs for ops and packet attacks. Shit from users who use vi, not emacs. Another long day of patrolling the IRC. Eating my doritos, and having a jerk, I chat with TheWalrus and #nanog faggots. All this niggas do is complain "the lag it's-- bad, chat is slow, and we're getting harassed." Shit, trolls, this k-line is your last. Once more and it's "G" and you're gone for good. Banned from the internet chatting neighbourhood. It's lonely at the top. Just me and CHANFIX. Day in and day out. Banning trolls with my linux. We give safe harbor to chatters world wide. From pedophiles to hacker thieves. Yeah, I won't lie: IRC is a cesspool of e-misfits. EazyCheezes and bagel-cutters like that nigga BitS. But at least we're the best. Disagree and you're gone. BRB, mom just told me gotta mow the lawn. but dont 4get 2 take ur pills ok GUY'S dumb bastards.....LMFAO..and yes i can spell un like u DUMB-EEESSSS .and i like caps 2 I enjoy black butts, butts in my face, butts which haven't been wiped, black dongs in my rectum, big sweaty black balls in my mouth, thick black dongs slapped across my face. I enjoy pressing my face into asses and sniffing them. I can take 2 cocks in my asshole and 3 in my mouth. I lick cocks and butts. I shake my ass in front of people's face before they fuck it hard. I wear a cock ring and enjoy letting people chain me up and piss on me. i'm going to jump through my screen and through the internet and into your face im gonna lift you with a forklift so high you'll beg to come down Hey website administrator, suck my motherfuckin' dick, you shit-lickin' asswipe. You probably fuck your mother up the asshole, don't you? What a little, wet, wimpering vagina you are! P.S. Herbert Mantooth, you are the love of my life and I want to ram my shit-covered cock up your juicy rump-hole and then suck your balls raw, you big-city bad-boy bitchass buttfuck!!! Then I want to piss in your ass... I'm so sick of all this "digital" vs analog crap. Guys, if you ANAL-logue people want "Warmth" just mix white noise into the sound file, or use shitty cables. That's what you're paying $5000 a preamp for, suckers! i heard some wolves dig up natural cannabis plants and get thc in their paws, but i never thought it was true until a wolf was hit by a car in front of my house! i smoked the paws and was six different kinds of fucked up Dumb Dongs, Dumb Dongs, Why Have You Left Me. How I miss those long nights, when you raped me so deftly! As the rain pitter pattered the shanty's metal roof, and my back felt the sting of your biting tooth. a single tear down my cheek, the pleasure of pain. Dumb dongs, won't you come back again? Again, I pray...please, to me! Dumb dongs is what I want to see! And if you'll never come back to nest, I can't be blamed for what comes next. Now I furiously scrape my Mach3, on my wrists for from life I flee. My skin getting all irritated, but I fear my dumb-dongless death is fated. Dumb Dongs, we had good times, and we had bad. From that first fondle when I was a teenage cockparties where semen was drunk. But I'm left with no Dongs and I'm utterly sunked. Dumb Dongs, au revoir, my lovely stiff pal. Fuck this suicide shit. I'll jus t fuck gals. DING DONG WONG GOT A RAP FOR MY CLOWNZ IM FAT AND UGLY; DEY PULL MY PANTS DOWNZ AT SCHOOL, AND ITS CRUEL AND DEY TINKS DEY IS COOL BUT NIGGAZ GONNA GET WHOOPED LIKE A NON-CLOWNY FOOL WHAT WHAT DONT MESS WITH JUGGALO DUDES OR ELSE WE WILL SIT ON YOU AND YOULL BE DOG FOODZ IT'S NOT THAT IM FAT--MOM SAYS MY BONES' BIG SHUT DA FOOQ UP BEFORE I SPLITZ YA WIG FOOdongs Now, what do you kids expect from an operating system coded by a man named Linus. You expect complete compatibility? He always has to carry a blanket with him wherever he goes, and asks Charlie Brown (hes a clown!) for help. He's supposed to be the saviour of the computing world? I'll put my money and my computer in good hands with Bill Gates and Microsoft. Because even in this review, you have to make reference to Windows XP, proving your inferiority complex. Good day. The Fart Fantasy: Expel your gas, I deeply inhale. The fresh fart from an athletic male. Ohhh yes it's good, sweet and pungent. An aromatic fecal luncheon! with delicate bouquet and wispy taste, this fart's among the best I've faced. Your nose wrinkled in abject disgust? Oh no, it's good. Try it--you must! Farts are nature's true delight. If you want some, theres no need to fight! Form a line right at my ass. Just wait for me to pass that gas. Your taste buds exploding, flavor extreme. I dont know about you, but it makes me cream. My pants that is, spurting now. Theres only one proper response - WOW. OMG U WILL NOT GET THE TRANSIENT DAMPENING U NEED U MIGHT AS WELL UZE UR RADIO SHAK EARFONES 2 MIC UR DRUM KIT WHICH IS MADE FROM 5 GALLON BUCKETS WHILE PLAYING UR MILK CARTON UKELELE AND INSTEAD OF RECORDING IT JUST HAVE SOME GUY PROMISE TO TRY REALLY HARD TO REMEMBER WHAT IT SOUNDED LIKE SO HE CAN TELL EVERYONE LATER i gobbled up turds. Yes. it was me!! I creeped into the mens room of my local mcd's. Murder is wrong, and sodomy's a sin, but there ain't nothin wrong with this shit eating grin. Shit eating grin! Shit eating grin. I'm a fecal feasting faggot, always have been. Shit eating grin! Shit eating grin! Well hey you guys, what's happenin? :) Folks, as we reflect on this massive tragedy, it behooves us to consider another giant wave sweeping the globe killing indiscriminantly, a wave of zionist oppresion. We need to divert funds away from this piddling natural disaster to fight the REAL threat: the Jewnami the only reason they are fighting for the marriage thing is just to bitch about something, if they get the right to marry theyll bitch about something else nothings good enough for homosexuals and various forms of coloreds. not only do they have forced equality but they have extra benifits and weak minded people tiptoeing around them trying to be PC. and then they try to force beliefs onto people. its ok for them to disagree and feel and think what they want, but then they try to enact various forceful tactics on people who are equally but oppositely off the norm as they are, such as racists. they have just as much right to feel the way that they do as a homosexual does to feel the way they do. marraige is not a civil right, but the ability to hate something is Anime characters gone wild. Non stop hardcore erotic anime moments captured on film, Shockingly hot steamy scenes of famous anime characters exploring wild sexual fantasies. Warning: Anime Fiction contains explicit raunchy content (yeah baby!) and is definitely not suitable for a candlelit romantic evening with a loved one, unless you both like watching anime characters get it on! why dont you linux users just shove all this open source bullshit up your own ass. no one cares about compiling or configuring or any of the bullshit you constantly jack off about. we normal people just care about chatting and sending email to our friends and viewing the www so please shut the fuck up about foxfire or whatever the fuck tangent you're going off on. thanks for reading this. dongs. Chat. Chat. Till the sun is gone. Chat till your eyes sag and your cheeks are wan. Quickly sip that fizzing mountain dew. Pop a few cheetos in your mouth and chew. Pimply fat nerdlings huddled on the puter. #Chatterz: Final Destination for those without a future. The Flu Fuck: blow that snot into your hand. wipe it on your tongue oh man. crunchy crunch, the boogers go. Gulp! you swallow. Down they go. Uh-uh-uh here comes sneeze. Achoo! You're bent, hands on your knees. A prodding's felt, betwixt your cheeks. What the heck? It's a linux geek With cock unfurl'd, he rips your pants. Nothing can stop this fag's advance. In it goes, his cock doth plunge. Your memory will never ever expunge: this terrible memory of assrape uncouth. Why didn't he wait? Only 10 feet from glory hole booth It's about time I told the truth. The reason I don't like gays is that when I was in the navy I had several homosexual experiences and so i know what faggots get up to is the devils work. This black guy in my dorm used to make me suck his dick and then he'd pump my ass full of his vile semen and there was nothing I could do about it. The shit eating faggot had me trapped there for months at sea so I had to suck his rancid sambo dick until we got back to port. That's why faggots will burn in a lake of fire and why I now have to wear a colostomy bag. MTV is responsible for brainwashing the youth into thinking that niggers are gods and that rap is music! The garbage that they pump into kids heads should be punishable by death via anal electrocution! And has anyone seen the advertisement for the video game called grand theft auto-san andreas? Isn't that special? A game that glorifies niggers selling crack and running the streets with rocket launchers, shooting at cops and speaking ebonics! God I hate niggers so much I can taste blood! Perhaps the hottest thing to do with Ashlee Simpson would be to (consensually) punch her in the face as hard as possible, busting her nose and lip, licking her bloody face all over, sticking your tongue down her throat and swapping blood and saliva for hours whilst playing with her raven hair and rubbing your hard-on against her thigh and crotch. I can't yawn loud enough. Every person has met you. The "crazy guy" who comes up with half-inspired shit. TAKE THE RED PILLTAKE THE BLUE PILLTAKE THE RED PILLTAKE THE BLUE PILLTAKE THE RED PILLTAKE THE BLUE PILLTAKE THE RED PILLTAKE THE BLUE PILLTAKE THE RED PILLTAKE THE BLUE PILLTAKE THE RED PILLTAKE THE BLUE PILLTAKE THE RED PILLTAKE THE BLUE PILLTAKE THE RED PILLTAKE THE BLUE PILLTAKE THE RED PILL hahahah shit face, yes i'm so jealous of you!!! i wish i was some ugly ass kid who lived his entire flaccid existence for the joy getting hits on some internet forum. it must be better than getting hits to the face that your alcoholic step father gives you, right? you fucking piece of miserable shit. i feel sorry for your shit parents. Still dialing 911 for emergency police services? If you're like many people in the New York area, these simple numbers can be a painful reminder of loved ones lost in the terrible tragedy of September 11, 2001. Trolls of trolls. You don't get this. We make jokes that you're sure to miss. LOL at LOL, Rolling on the floor. Laughing or Crying? You ass-ruined whore. This troll's so meta you choked on a chip. Too much ranch dressing, you slant-eyed nip. Go back to Everquest and pretend you're a girl. We're the royalty of trolls. Kings, dukes and earls. For those of you who dont know: The south beach diet consists of eating the moist turds from the discarded bathing suits abandoned at the beach. People, am I the only one who realizes that binary packages are almost useless? Except a few basic packages (as in USE independent, e.g. gcc), the result depends greatly by the USE variable. Let's take for example the mod_php package. How useful a binary mod_php will be? buddy, if you were a girl i would take u out to a nice steak dinner (w/ plenty of steak fries) and a movie (has to be matinee tho) hi my names jimmy and im 13 and the other day i was playing with myself while watching showcase and i realised i couldnt quite reach my fireman with my mouth. so what i did was i took a small straw and shoved it down my urethra. and i started to blow really hard.. now i have a small bubble like figure on the side of my fireman.. could this be from blowing into the straw??? Algebra is the class today. All these numbers are making me gay. Square root of this, cosine of that. Goddamn the math teacher is fat. Equations and proofs, I can't take any more. She might be fat, but hey : She's a whore. I'll calculate the angle to ruin her cunt. Drive in my protractor, for a calculator I hunt. Need to calculate this math bitch's weight. Oh fuck I've been crushed ; too late. Uhm, excusez-moi, but as a regular on the richest channel on EFnet, I think I have the authority to deem you a pusillanimous troll. Go back to dipping your stale cheetos in your ramen, you white trash too-poor-to-afford-neutrogena too-stupid-to-know-Biore-is-better pizza-faced nerd. I'm going to go ejaculate into a fresh silk scarf, hand made by a Thai company in which my father has a controlling interest. I'm just glad your inane blather only took a small portion of my glorious 30" Apple LCD. I also like to eat poop. One time my girlfriend came over and i just ate her poop. She got very very angry wehen i tried to kiss her she like said " you are the sickest person in the world you sick fuck" then i said what you don't like to eat poop. I mean i don't see the big deal i mean i have been doing it since i was a kid. I nevver had any friends because i would always eat there poop after they pooped it out. Since i never had any friends I just made friends with my poop. I would make racecars out of my poop and burn my penis with cigar buds. I think you should just live with it fuck with me and i'll instant message you with text size 25 I flogged my engorged penis in a manic phase. My scrotum, hairless and taut, basked in warm rays. Glistening with sweat, Oh how it did shine. The helmet of a gladiator from olden time. Two bronzed eggs, such a glorious sight. A symbol of manhood and all that is right. You may choose to snicker or call me queer. Make no mistake; I don’t take it in the rear. Look here "dad", the thing you need to understand about your daughter is that she WANTS to be raped. She LIKES it. Look at the way she dresses! If she wanted to be left alone she would wear the burqa allah so wisely dictates. Instead she dresses like a western harlot, she desires to be beaten and raped like all sluts of the west. If you were a better father to her, this wouldn't have happened but that was then, and this is now, and I'm not going to let you stand in the way of her happiness any longer. If you want to get untied any time soon, I suggest you quit screaming and let me do what must be done in peace. You wouldn't think it to look at me, but I am a serious badass and I will mess you up if you so much as look at me funny. A lot of people were executed last year in this state for that deadliest of crimes: Fucking with me. So step back off of my IRC channel if you know what's good for you, BITCH. Earlier today, while talking to a client about her policy, I accidentally said "I'm pro rape" instead of "I'll pro-rate your account". She tried to ignore the slip up, unfortunately I complicated matters by gagging her with my necktie and repeatedly raping her. Sometimes I think I must not care about Geico shareholder value at all. I cant believe this. I bought this Radeon X800XT and I'm only getting 70 FPS in the latest action game. The manufacturer's drivers are shit, and the programming for the game is sub-standard. I spend my good money, and I demand 72 FPS for my entertainment pleasure. I will attempt registry hacks, extreme overclocking/cooling and DLL replacement to achieve the necessary result, but if I am not successful, this game is the worst in history and should be consigned to your recycle bin. Good day. This fucking faggot just pisses me off becuz he and I were internet dating and he broke up with me for some other fuckin newbie. Ima tell you what don't internet date him cuz he cheats on you and he is mean. Im going to hack him soon and hes going to wish he never met me that fuckin faggot. Insane Clown Posse MegaRap - We're da Insane Clown Posse. We're overweight and bossy. Oh shit you gotta know what's up. To be hardcore you need make-up. Closet faggots all are we. Fiddle my balls and my pee-pee. Insane Clown Posse? More like Loony Queer Gang. One dude who's more attractive than us: Shredder's pal Krang. We're weird and we're angry and we don't conform at all. Of course we've never faught before, we'd run from any brawl. You coward! You goddamn pussy. Can't you handle us? It's not our fault cheetos taste good and we've got ample guts. Raw raw, I'm Violent J and I play the trombone. I march in the school marching band; I've got a loving home. My life sucks bad and I kill cops and shit on toilet seats. I curled my hair and did my face and now I'm selling beats. For legions of you fat-assed fucks think I'm the coolest thing. But all I do is amplify my farts and yelling, sing. In secret I buy Eminem to study up his rhymes. but I don't get it, how he does, I cry to Mom and whine. My favorite sport is Ninja and I always dress in black. It looks a little awkward in gym class when I run track. I never bring the proper clothes--of changing I am scared. What if the jocks see how my tighty-whities are all teared? I only wear one pair, of course. For more would be a waste. And after a long day, well, I just LOVE it how they taste. That sour sweet of sweat and shit forever on my lips. It's not my fault if briefs well used will in time, rip. Wash my clothes, you dare suggest? Hygiene's invoked my ire. I scrub myself with oil from a pack of Oscar Meyers. Dead people, gore and blood. It's shocking is it not? Check it out, my older brother might get me some pot. Once my dad gave me some beer and yes, I took a sip. Let me say, it's good! I couldn't even handle it. And tuesday after school my friend named Mike gave me a cig! But I was scared of smoke-caused cancer. Maybe when I'm big... Instead I wrestle with my pals in first or second grade. I want to beat those little punks, but in truth, well, I'm afraid. They pin me down and kick me in the head so violently, and when I lay, a sobbing heap, they squat on me and pee. Juggy Juggy Juggalo two four six. This is Linkin Park produced exclusively by hicks. I'm the terror from Vermont, the danger state with trees. Yeah, I'm from the cuts. It's practically LBC. I'm good at mathematics but I don't like history. but more than doing homework I read Nancy Drew myst'ries. So you see it doesn't get any more hardcore than this clown. You better watch yourself or--OOPs O shit! I just made brown. I don't have such a good control of muscles in my rear. Just one drawback of being an HIV plus queer. Sometimes Dad dresses like Gandalf, does me up as Frodo. My mom watches--she kind of looks like hunchback Quasimodo. The ring of power tween my cheeks; his middle in my earth, his burly arms fast wrapped around my rarely-cleansed girth. I try to tell my teachers of my plight, my awful tale. But when I get to Frodo: "Holy shit I DO NOT CARE." A juggalo cannot exist if Daddy is a-rapin. But in truth, you get to like it so there's no escapin'. What's it matter that my songs completely lack a tune? My customers are tone-deaf pusillanimous poltroons. They listen in the desperate wish that they'll become less nerdy. "I can't go to parties," they say. Bed time is seven thirty. Rebel they will, alone in a bedroom with door a-signed. "No girls allowed," boldly proclaimed. I don't think the girls mind. Sipping mountain dew and with a pop a new can-Pringles, they protest online. Forum posts. these fags: forever single. I'm ninety pounds above the line. They say I'm overweight. So what if I could never ever ever get a date. Yo! I'm a clown and I'm crazy and I sing scary shit. I've got a gang of white kids who in front of Linux sit. The white screen pales their faces which are pocked with pimples many, they spend their nights with pants unzipped, jerking to Brain and Penny. This you see's my posse and you betta represent. Don't be male or have a cock--our pants'll be a tent. This's Violent J now, signing off, concluding this show live. It's time to show my true ID! Love, Mega Man 5 I LOVE PEE hi, i came across a picture on 'rate my poo' a few weeks ago, of a female bent over in a forest or something, with a long 'log' coming out of her backside. it's since been vanished from the site - any chance of it being re-posted, or getting a copy of it emailed to me? that would be great! thanks....... I'm a Vietnam Vet. I don't like gooks, Islam and all that shit. It is a just war in Iraq. Those son of a bitchin Iraqi's are trying to make other people live like them, including you. Look at what they did to the Kurds, the invasion of Kuwait and the beheadings of the internationals who have nothing to do with the war. They're cowards and eventually will be eliminated if for anything, their oil. The John Kerry liberals of the world are also your enemies along with the fuckin' U.N. Koffi Annan is nothing but a lying/stealing thief with interests in the middle east. Fuck 'em all. I'm glad we went to war without 'em. Remember, it wasn't too long ago that we were at war with G.Britain, Germany, Japan. North Korea is next. Kim Il Jung has shit for brains and will also meet his fate. Don't trust those fuckin' Russians either. The history of war always repeats itself. I would rather fight and die, not for the liberal fagots of this country, but for my own piece of mind and revenge. Fuck all that talk about colateral damage. How much colateral damage was done in New York? Just as there are warnings on cigarette packages that smoking will give you cancer, White people should be warned that their risk of getting AIDS is increased dramatically by having sex with Negroes. Not that a National Socialist, or any racially aware White person, would ever in a million years have a desire to have sex with a Negro! However, many of our racial brothers and sisters are victims of anti-White propaganda and actually believe that race-mixing is a good thing. These people should be made aware that their chances of getting AIDS is increased by such actions.Negroes, who only make up about 13 of the US population, now account for more than half of all new H.I.V. infections, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Negro females account for 72 percent of all new cases among women. These facts should shake the racially numb White into reality! You have all been brainwashed. Yes the airwaves taught you that hating blacks is wrong and they do not stop there. They are telling us that we must accept faggots rights. They tell us when we are preaching the word of God about how God hates the HOMOS that we are commiting hate crimes. Another buzzword for you simpletons to use to make yourself think you are a tolerant intelligent person. I guess you folks think you are smarter than God. You tell the semen drinking feces eating faggots that they have a right to do what they do even if it kills them with disease. You say I cannot preach my bible and warn these filthy faggots where they will spend eternity should they continue this vile lifestyle. Does anyone have tolerance for a person living a Christian lifestyle. Who sticks up for us? I always told myself I would try anything once but this was a total failure. Was smoking some killer hash in denmark and met this american african woman named shawna. She seemed to be educated and we hit it off. One thing led to another and then She gave me a BJ which was really good and when I went down on her I vomited. I lied and told her I had a cold with post nasal drip. I have sores in my mouth. After wiping the vomit off of her and a couple lines of coke I entered her doggy style. Good thing she would have made me dismount after the expression of the stench I experienced. It was a terrible diareah stench which from what i hear is normal. I had to take yet another line of coke to finish the job. The sex was below average and dismal if you consider the hideous odor I went through. Just got back from the Doctor and I have the clap. I thought Americans were clean. WTF? FUCC ALL U DAYM HATERSZ..U CAN JUX EAT DIS FRESH LAO PUSSY RYT HER NIGGUH!!! I DONT GIVUH DAYM IF PPL CALL ME A FUCCIN HOE CUZ I NOE IM NOT. DATS ALL U GUYS FUCCIN DO IS 2 TALK SHIT ABOUT ME?? IS DAT ALL U CAN FUCCIN DO? U NO WAT? I DONT GIVUH DAYM CUHZ! FUCC U NIKKAS DER AINT ROOM 4 HATERSZ IN MAH LIFE AND SOUL NIGGUH FUCC U! DIE N GO 2 HELL BITCH! ALL U DO IS JUDGE ME BYE DA WAY I DRESS AND U DONT NOE DA WHOLE STORY. DONT JUX JUDGE DA BOOK BY DA COVER! READ DA WHOLE STORY FIRST! I FUCCIN HATE ALL U FUCCIN HATERSZ! U DONT NOE WAT IVE BEEN THREW! U NOE WAT! FUCC ALL U HATERSZ! U FUCCIN DISGUST ME! U MAKE ME WONA SPIT AT CHU! NiKKuH FuCc aLL Da HaTeRsZ uP iN DiZ ShiiT! Well, what else is open? Besides your mouth...when you're like kissing on some gay dude and like holding his muscles, cuz his arms just are like wrapped around you...and you feel like so safe cuz you're like, you know, not like you're gay or nothin' but God you just want to like bury yourself in his chest and just live there forever. Mac supporters are always criticizing Intel processors for their deadend CISC processors. Well, I just have to say it's not worth the weight gain. So what the G5 has a more promising future? I've seen the obesity figures on Mac users. Is using a Bisque processor worth the risks of being overweight? Computers affect almost every aspect of our lives, from driving to alarm clocks to music to refridgerators to our leisure time to our social lives to ad nauseum. These things are intertwined with our lives in ways that are often unnoticed, yet they affect us directly - so directly that I think that when we are talking about the latest Mac product, we're not talking about a "product" but about a way of life. your a little bitch..all you do is sit at home on ya comp looking for free homosexual website...................come to arizona mother fucker.the desert juggalos will be waitin.hows bout you o to every state and walk up to some real juggalo killas and tell em to they face icp sucks..then we see whos tough....your talking hit through a fucin creen......HA HA HA HA HA pussy White women simply can't get enough black dick, it's a proven fact. You may think your wife is faithful, but this is generally only the case if she's not attractive enough to land a black cock of her own. Don't believe me? Think about how many black men your wife or girlfriend interacts with EVERY DAY. Odds are, she's fucking at least one of them, maybe more! I've been running Windows XP since beta2, and it really kicks ass. I don't have to recompile my kernel when I want to install an ethernet card, it automatically detects it and installs the drivers no matter who the manufacturer is. Dual monitors? No chore with windows, get two video cards, two monitors and it's set up! I don't need to edit config files with editors that are 20 years old, and show it. Intellimouse custom buttons? Piece of cake, with my Intellimouse software.You want to run games? Great! Choose from an array of tens of thousands of games that run great under DirectX and the NT subsystem. Stability got you down? Not in this version, I have had uptimes of over a month (and then the damn power goes out). Good internet browser? No need for Kommunist shit, you've got the great Internet Explorer 6 a click away. Doing some development? Nothing but the best for Windows users, choose from a suite of Visual Studio products that suits your needs, with one killer IDE. Or, pick up a beta edition of Visual Studio.NET if you have 200 megs of RAM to spare! You Linux faggots can keep rooting for your piece of shit operating system that Windows 3.1 tops in terms of compatibility, all the while hindering your experience for something else you could be doing, while I use the operating system of choice (or by default) for over 200 million others in the world. Anti-Microsoft zealots piss and moan all you want, but your queer little OS won't be the reigning desktop champion anytime soon. Yep, Heidi Klum has done it, she´s shown just how low she will go. It´s sad in a way, but to be expected, she isn´t getting any younger, and what better way to bring attention to yourself, than to show the world you´re a low-class nigger-loving slut-whore black pole-humping piece of euro-trash? At one time, early in her career, she was quite beautiful, but now, she´s just another pig. She´s no different than the usual white trash that ends up dating/marrying this unevolved species that time forgot. So, farewell Heidi, hope you get pregnant, and have the opportunity to raise future criminals, murderers and rapist, er, I mean children A special warning about Matrox; they are from Canada, and so their products do not meet the demanding electrical standards required of American computer equipment and because their chipsets are mostly illegal counterfeits of American chips, you may encounter unexpected bugs and compatibility problems with standard APIs such as DirectX. ATI is also Canadian and has the same problems; counterfeit computer part manufacturers are attracted to Canada by its lax intellectual property laws. Don't open those emails. Don't surf that page. Lock yourself in a faraday cage. Your monitor'll pop and your CPU will fry. All I have to do is click the button labeled: Die. I've got your IP targeted, your DNS uncloaked. Surrended and pony up, or click and Boom: You're smoked. The closest I've ever come to sucking my father's dick was the time he caught me going through the trashcan in his bedroom. As a teenager growing up, I would always search my parents' bedroom trashcan for used condoms. I'd slide the used condoms over my own cock and jerk off with them, excited by the feeling of my father's jizz and by the idea of adding my own fuckload into his. Well, he eventually caught me kneeling over the trashcan, sticking my tongue deep into one of the sticky used condoms and stroking my cock with my free hand. I was literally caught with my pants down, and there was no way for me to hide what I was doing. After what seemed like several horrific minutes of stunned silence, he finally mumbled something about the fact that at least I was growing up into a healthy young man, and that I shouldn't stop what I was doing or I'd get blueballs. As embarrassed as I was, my cock didn't want me to stop what I was doing, either. My father sat next to me on the bed while I continued to sit on the floor jerking off. The novelty of this situation had me horny as fuck but also a bit nervous (sort of like performance anxiety) and it took me a while to finally pump out my cream. As I started to shoot off, I felt an unexpected sensation on my shoulder. My father had been stroking his own cock as well, and he orgasmed at the same time I did. I quickly turned around and saw him pump out another two or three streams of cum. His eyes were screwed tight, and that fact made me bold enough to lean in close enough to gently lick on the slit of his swollen cockhead. I got the last drop of his spunk on my tongue. If he noticed, he never let on. So I actually tasted my father's jizzcream, both from his used condoms and directly from his cock, but I never did actually blow him. But maybe one of these days I'll have the guts to ask him if he'd let me. I think he might just not mind! Did you know? The real reason slavery was abolished in the United States was the discovery that niggers would gladly continue working in the fields all day in order to buy themselves shiny shoes and fried chicken in order to demonstrate their newfound wealth and freedom to other fellow niggers. By removing the financial sensibilities of the white man from these shitskinned jungle turds, our society has flourished greatly in the last 140 or so years. It's just retarded 10yr old humor. Oh wow, Topless chick made out of pixels, being zoomed in on by a perv. The desert comment doesn't even make sense, there's grass there. Also, You can clearly tell she's dead, So that would be fantasizing necrophelia. Good job. Sick bastards. We need to remove laws which prohibit civilian ownership of rocket propelled grenades and mobile surface to air missiles to enable our patriots to overthrow the state in the event a tyrannical government takes power. My mouth is at your disposal. Use it for your pleasure as I'm a GREAT cocksucker. Use it for your toilet as I'll drink your piss and eat your shit turd logs. You may treat me however it is that you want, whatever makes you HOT HARD and HORNY. I like guys 50 yrs or older. Straight/Bi/Gay Married/Single/Whatever...I am discreet. I am single and live alone in Long Beach California, so would like to keep action in Long Beach California, so would like to keep action in the LA/Northern Orange county area. I can either host or come to you. I await your golden logs, mouth watering. what is the point of gay marriage ? marriage as an institution exists to keep people who don't love each other together for the benefit of their offspring . why do gays want this? It's a shame the gooks beat you good in Vietnam. (though you probably won the unofficial underage girl rape contest)You fucking rambo wankers <3 BUSH, ONWARD CHRISTIAN SOLDIERZ, NEW WORLD ORDER, MITE MAKEZ RITE, THE SWORD CHOPZ OFF THE ARM HOLDING THE PEN, MANIFEZT DESTINY, REPREZENTIN' DA ZOG CLIQUE, MACHIVELLIAN, DIDN'T NEED 2 SERVE IN VIETNAM TO BOMB DA KORAN, BANG BANG, IRAQ THE NEW SOVIET BLOC, GUN-BARREL DIPLOMACY, VOTE NADER VOTE NADER VOTE NADER As long as I can remember, I've been picking at this small scab inside my right nose near the nostril opening alongside the bone area. Sometimes its flaky and hardened and thats why I pick at it and it never really goes away. Other times, its perfectly fine. Your thoughts? Hello. I am rich, and have the biggest computer. In addition to this, I also masturbate into the most expensive monogrammed towels you'll ever set your eyes upon. You can not even possibly compare to me. Good day. I saw in a recent magazine that companies are legitimately selling catheters as gaming accessories. Sitting immobile in a chair, hooked up to a catheter for the rest of your life.. does this sound like anyone?? Christopher Reeve tried in vain for years to escape what you people do to yourselves willingly every day. My God, get some priorities!! speaking of policy, at least my country has enough sense to limit itself to two moderately similar political parties. you disgust me with your parliamentary coalitions that don't manage to do anything except to highlight the evils of socialism OMG RIAA MPAA STARFORCE 3 DA SCENE IS DYING FTP FBI CYBERCRIMES DOJ RIP ISONEWS MITNICK SCENERS CODING MOUNTAIN DEW LEECH ACCESS DISTRO HONEYPOT UNIVERSITY SERVER OC192 TOPSITES CLICK HERE FOR FREE WAREZ CRACKIN PHREACKING HPVAC PHRACK MAGAZINE 2600 MITNICK MITNICK MITNICK FXP COLECO WTF LEAVE CHEESEBURGERS OUT OF THIS WHAT DID THEY DO TO YOU!? JUST BECAUSE YOURE SOME PO-DUNK NIGGA FROM DA GHETTO DOESNT MEAN YOU GOTTA BE BASHIN ON COOKED COW I MEAN SERIOUSLY ILL BET MONEY THAT YOU EAT ENOUGH FRIED CHICKEN TO FEED THE ENTIRE CONTINENT OF AFRICA AND YOU PROBABLY GUZZLE ENOUGH MALT LIQUOR TO FILL 200 BOEING 747S SO SHUT THE FUCK UP YARD APE I fail to see how you're a genius; passing up people who can actually play instruments for rappers who blubber into a microphone. However, I pick up on the hints that you're an African American and you would support your fellow "musicians" in their tirade of encouragement for shootings, drugs, and whores. Little do you know you're only fueling this society's demise by encouraging barbaric hip hop culture. Have a great day. Of course, the day will come when the stupids and the normals such as (chances are) yourself will fuck things up with your free-market, all-American, freedom-loving life-style to the point where the rest of us who have more than two brain-cells rubbing together will have no choice but to exterminate you all. Sure, eat another cheeseburger and add another pound, pretend to be a sensitive, caring guy when all you really want to do is sneak into your room and see if you can find any pornography where hot blondes are forced to eat shit and suck black cocks while hot Asian lesbians suck menstrual blood out of their wet cunts. Just keep your head pointed straight at that little monitor of yours, and you won't even see us as we sneak up and put the gun to your head. We will show you no mercy. We will find you, we will slit your childrens' throats, and people like you will hang from the street lights. None shall escape the holocaust of the useless! Would you like another piece of waddymelon to go with that fried chicken and malt liquor? Beat it shitskin banjolips. This is a place for humans. yea i'm in class and fell upon this site, i'm no techie but am quite intrigued by the discussions taking place here. altough, i mean you guys sound like internet geeks, the kind with acne and anime and weight problems. do ya really need to resort to vulgarity against your own kind? express your opinions, this country was built on those kind of freedoms, but take a chill pill.yes, i did just type that. i bet you shop at thinkgeek you faggot, go jack off while wearing your binary watch before you cry yourself to sleep in your tux blanket YOU KNOW GUYS I THINK INSTEAD OF CAPS-LOCK, WE SHOULD START SAYING CAPS-LOL, BECAUSE IT CERTAINLY IS AMUSING WATCHING CERTAIN UPTIGHT INTERNET NERDS GET ALL AGITATED OVER A BUNCH OF UPERCASE LETTERZ. Typing laughter on IRC!While I understand that your knowledge of the world outside the Frances-strewn shards that, on any other day, would have comprised your double-wide is rather, shall we say, limited; Here in the big scary city we "America Haters" like to call civilization, there are rules that govern behavior and, to put a finer point on it, internet humor. And, although one could argue that, having missed out on the more elegant points in life such as color television or refrigeration, that you should be exempted from said governances - I find it best to point out that ignorance of the law is no excuse.This fact, combined with your abhorent neoconservative indoctrination only leads one to conclude that your mental stature, while irrefutably suited towards a more custodial vocation, does not serve you well here on the fifth-gear world of the "information superhighway." Indeed, I would be remiss if I did not instead point you to a more, shall we say, rewarding hobby such as admiring your reflection in the murky waters of the local "crick" or, if you fancy, arguing with trees. slitting open the urethra, cauterizing the prostrate, inflicting corporal punishment, blistering the penis with caustic acid, flaying the penile skin with razor blades, sewing the prepuce shut with metal wire, encasing the genitals in plaster or in lockable metal cages, or fitting the penis with penile rings studded with sharp metallic teeth to discourage erections The doctor performed fabulously with his textbook execution of a four-point circumcision as he burst into my wife's room in the maternity ward, pinched a clamp around my son's foreskin, and inserted an instrument between the foreskin and glans. I covered my ears as the infant's shrieks intensified, and the doctor was gracious enough to quickly tear the foreskin lengthwise as my little son's head shook back and forth ohh yeah I can't believe I just took a shit in my bellman uniform at the front desk. What the fuck? I can't stand up and take it to the employee lounge because I am literally wading in nuggets of my own ass gravy. Any attempt at movement would send this rancid post-chili splurting all over my wingtips and into view of every tranny prostitute within the hotel lobby. It doesn't help that I've been doing the night audit all night! I can barely stay awake! What am I going to say to the hotel manager when she comes back from getting chili dogs and asks what I just did in the presence of the hotel guests? She'll make me drop trau in front of everyone again. There it is, the 6'5" shemale on meth just asked me if I could smell 'that'. I gotta go. This is how I calculated the how the PS3 would be about 4-6X more powerful than the current PS2 according to Moore's law. Assuming that the clock speed and other performance metrics of the PS2 stay relatively proportional, in 18 monthes the speed/power doubles to 600MHZ, in another 18 monthes (2005) it doubles to 1200MHZ. 1200 divided by 300 gives you 4. I added the range of 4-6 b/c I know that SOI yields more efficiency and they certainly are going to use more and faster memory...hence the range of 2. Either way, the PS3 ain't gonna be 1000X more powerful. You'd have to be a gullible fool to believe that. What the fuck does that have to do with anyhting. Do you have a dick in your ear or something. i dont want your fuckin apology, I want you to just log off, stop fuckin writing me period and then go to your mothers room, eat her out, beside the drawers, next to the trash cans, and then tell her I appreicate her shaving my balls b/c its really hard to do it myself. Until next time, fuck you and use your teeth to pick the hairs off my ass. ha ha. oh yeah you dick likcing fuck. you are a waste of sperm your mother should have fuck that truck driver other than that dirty as german (your father).<---(you're not smat enough to get it, stupid fuck) Maybe you would be doing something better with you life other than argueing with me about posting meaningless shit. Guess whoes back talking shit this mutha fuckin faggot is a mutha fuckin bitch saying he hates rap with a passion then all I got to say is fuck you you mutha fuckin bitch I fukin say alot of curse words because I fuckin hate when you start hating on rap if anybody gots a problem with the way I think then you could find a fuckin short peir and take a mutha fuckin walk I hope you fuckin die a long and painful death you fuckin bitch later you mutha fuckin haters word to your mutha fuckin mutha before yall bitchmade mutha fuckin computer nerds come on here talkin shyt like u hard get da infos straight..da man dat did my site TOLD ME STRAIGHT OUT he did juice's site so b4 u call me a fuckin biter get all your facts on da table u ignorant ass mutha fuckaz!!!if I MADE DA SITE u would have every right to call me a biter...i didnt do shit to dat site..da man contacted me..showed me juices site and said he did it...and then did mine and didnt even finish it so fuck all yall hatein ass mutha fuckaz!!if yall wana run lip do it face to face fuck dis computer shit..HOLLA!! I've been into just about every car scene, truck scene, motorcycle scene and yes the import scene is the worst. Main reason is because we got a bunch of little pricks who drive around and think they're badasses cause they gots a body kit y0 and in all reality I could take on 10 of them at the same time and make em cry. I'm getting to the point to where I don't even wanna go to car meets anymore cause of all the stupid bullshit thats goes on and that I get associated with it cause I drive an "import". I'm about ready to go buy another 5.0 or camaro and be done with imports all together just so I'm NOT associated with all these fucking morons driving around now. I drive my Grand Cherokee all over the place and I always have other Jeep owners wave at me. take this short quiz to see if u qualify to meet me: ugly? stupid? mean? ghetto? non english speaking? not from ohio? if u answer yes to any of the above, don't click to meet me cuz i hate all of the above :) It's not so much that I hate anime, well I do its utter shit, but that's not too bad because the world would be boring if we all liked the same thing. Anyway what really gets to me is anime fans or 'otakus' as they have dubbed themselves. They think that liking anime makes them superior to those who don't, they think that if someone does not like anime it means they are too stupid to understand it and they worship Japan. There ongoing obsession with Japan makes me want to kill myself, they all want to learn japanese and move to Japan to be an anime artist. They insist on speaking in broken Japanese all the time, trying to show off to there fellow anime losers just how much they know and they get offended if you say a slight word against Japan. They also have an obsessin with gay people and yell and scream whenever they see one, they say that gay people should be treated the same as straight people yet i don't see then shout and scream when they see a straight couple do you? No, they only reason they love gay people is becasue they are desperate to show the world how openmided they are and they just wait for someone to something like 'thats so gay' so that they have have a 3 hour discussion about it.I myself don't have anything against gays but to be honest i don't really think about it. I could go on for hours but I can't be botherd just know one thing Anime couldn't be crapper if it tried. I don't know about you guys, but knowing that gay marriage exists here now has hurt marriage. Whenever I try and fuck my wife, all I can think about is two sweaty, heaving male bodies joined together in government sanctioned disgusting decadent man sex with large calloused hands grasping and moist gasping lips joined with giant throbbing cocks ohh yeah NO I SAY PEOPLE LIKE YOU HAVE SMALL DICKS COS YOU DO BUTT MUNCH YOU DONT EVEN HAVE A NAME YOU SAD FUCK PISS OFF NO ONE WANTS YOU HERE ON THE PLACE OR IN THE WORLD YOU FUCKING JEW NERD HITLER SHOULD HAVE KILLED YOU FUCKING ASS YEARS AGO AND THE REASON YOUR PISSED OFF IS COS THE TRUTH HURTS YOU WHY DONT YOU GO BACK TO WEARING A PINK DRESS AND BEING FUCKED BY YOUR UNCLE YOU LIITLE DRAG QUEEN GO TAKE YOUR FAGGOT SELF AND JUMP OFF A CLIFF SMARTGIRL IS BETTER THEN YOU WILL EVER BE YOU ARE NOTHING AND FOREVER BE NOTHING LATER GEEK I, for one, feel that Fox TV has gone too far with their programming excesses. Have you seen their new show, the X-Files? It's simply ludicrous! I mean, demonic possession? Aliens? Come on, that's ridiculous! But the worst thing is that it implies our government lies to us! Hey, Sergeant Muldower: This is America. Love it, or leave it! HAHAHAHAHA FOOL YOU COUNTRY WAS FOR CONVICTS TO THEY ONLY THING THAT WAS DIFFERENT IS ALL YOU FUCKS HAD IT SO BAD YOU GOT CRANKY AND HAD A WAR OF INDEPENCE COS THE BRITISH WERE ABUSING YOUR ASSES HEY AND YOUR COUNTRYS A REST ROOM FOR MEXICANS LEAST I DO SOMETHING ABOUT OUR PROBLEM WHAT DO YOU DO ABOUT MEXICANS THATS RIGHT NOTHING COS YOUR A CHICKEN SHIT WHAT DO YOU CARE IF YOUR WOMEN LOOK GOOD YOUR GAY AND THATS WHY WE ARE NOT ALL FAT CO for all of you non believers. please just answer 1 question 4 me. If God didnt exist then how did the earth get here.You will probably come up with some answer like , a bunch ef gas and dust and a star formed the earth. but if all that is true then hoe did that gas and dust get here. i am a Christain and i encurage you all to be 1 aswell. You will be much happie, take it from a kid that knows ASIANS FUCKING SUCK THERE EVERY WHERE DOWN IN SYDNEY FUCKING OVEL EYED GOOKS. WENT DOWN TO CHINA TOWN 2 WEEKS AGO BASHED A COUPLE OF THE DICKHEADS.THE PROBLEM IS THEY BREED LIKE RABBITS THEY JUST GO ROUND FUCKING, SPITTING OUT BABYS AND SPREADING THEIR CHICKEN FLU AROUND DAMN FILTHY ASIANS. 88 HAIL HITLER SKINHEADS FOREVER TO THAT PISS ANT COWARD FUCK COS I'M NOT A PATRIOTIC AMERICAN YOU NIGGER LOVER I'M A PATRIOT TO WHITE SUPREMACY YOU SMELLY TURD. YEAH AND I'D LIKE TO SEE YOU TRY AND KILL ME YOU CANDY ASS FUCK WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO BEAT ME TO DEATH WITH YOUR HANDBAG. I'M A SKINHEAD YOU FOOL I'VE HAD MORE FIGHTS THEN YOU'VE HAD HOT DINNERS. STUPID FAG SO SHUT THE FUCK UP OR I'LL PUT YOU TO WORK ON MY COTTON FARM FUCK YOU FATSO YEAH YOU CAN TALK SHIT BEHIND YOU COMPUTER YOU FAT NERD. IF I EVER SEE YOU IN THE STREET I'M GONNA STAB YOU IN THE FACE WITH MY HITLER YOUTH KNIFE YOU STUPID CHEESEBURGER CHEEKS THEN YOU'LL FALL TO THR GROUND AND CRY LIKE A LITTLE BITCH STUPID LITTLE RICH VAG YOU DUMBASS SKINHEADS COME FROM MANY DIFFERNT BACKGROUNDS RICH, POOR, MIDDLE CLASS ALTHO I WOULDN'T ACCEPT A PANSY ASS SKIRT LIKE YOU INTO MY GANG fuck asians I am from flushing queens newyork and I'm pissed the fuck off because ugly inferior orientals are taking over my home town of flushing putting up prices on houses and speaking there ugly chinese languages. orientals ARE not smart that's a fucking myth. orientals will NEVER be white. p.s. DROP DEAD INFERIOR ORIENTALS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! as far as i can tell, mexico sucks. i've never been there, but i have mexican neighbors. they suck. 15 of them live in one house. only one of them has a job. the rest collect welfare. one of them was even arrested for molesting a 12 year old girl. funny thing is, i took a dump on their porch. i'm pretty sure i saw one of them watching me. i wiped my ass with their news paper and jammed it in the mailbox. they suck anyways. which is why mexico sucks. congratulations on getting modded up you simpering idiot! maybe with all that infamy you can convince a geek surgeon to remove some ribs so you can suck on your own nub penis you fucking faggot!!! I pray to the wonderful Lord Jesus Our Saviour and thank Lord God in the Highest Heaven for all the beauty and love in the world every time I fuck a nun with a glass-covered bone-carved dildo. Tear that dry and wrinkled punani! Objectivism is nothing but selfishness with a philosophical bumper sticker stuck on its ass that somehow purports to elevate it to respectability. Objectivism will succeed as soon as human nature is purged of empathy, sympathy, love for one's family, love for one's community, love for humanity itself. In other words, never.The only people who take this shit seriously are earnest but naive college students with too much philosophy classes under their belt and no real life experience, 40-something assholes behind on their alimony payments, and nutjobs who horde guns in the woods and consider themselves to be part of the minutement militia, 2 centuries hence.Objectivism has as much a tenuous hold on reality as the KKK and neonazi skinheads. They deserve our attention as much as the mating habits of dung beetles. Oh yeah, I forgot, Ayn Rand is selfish racist classist elitist bitch. Am I making an impression on you here, you fruitcakes?Stay in the woods and spout your ignorant mumbo-jumbo, the real world doesn't need you. we'll take your selfish asocial bullshit seriously when hell freezes over. I work at a University IT helpdesk, and after far too many malware problems from far too many dumb lusers (and many of them repeat visits), I've adopted a new policy.If a student or member of faculty comes in with malware problems for the first time, I fix it for them and I give them a Gentoo Linux install CD to go away with. If they come back with viruses/spyware a second time, I tell the luser to stop bothering me, and that I gave them the solution to install last time. Linux is an OS immune to these kinds of problems. Anyone think jews are really hot? Especially rabbis! Those greasy curls send me wild.Sadly there's no jews in my region of the desert, so camels have to do. mexicans are lazy?? umm no we are theopposite of lazy. we are taking overthis country and you white americans andblack americans people are not doinganything about it.all yall do is say"fuking wetbacks go back to homecountry" or "you taking our jobs,, nowwe are unemployed" you know what boo hooyou call us stupid or whatever, butatleast we know how to get a job.if youask me you americans are the lazy people. Women are too fragile. The mere suggestion of being able to play a female character in Doom 3 is laughable. Well, I guess you could play as a maid or cook. At least that would be just about as boring as the current storyline.It has been proven in many scientific studies that women are inferior to men. This is why women are deservingly payed less for doing the same work as a man. The only valuable skills a woman can ever hope to learn are cooking and cleaning. Men are too busy with important business dealings to worry about cooking and cleaning for themselves.History is littered with evidence of this. For instance, Joan of Arc led an army on the battlefield, only to be subsequently raped, tortured, and killed. In the Bible (the word of God), Eve was tricked into eating the forbidden fruit because she was weak-minded. Many men said that a woman could never fly around the world alone. Amelia Earhart proved they were right.At least the countries in the Middle East have their priorities straight. Their women are not allowed to go to school, hold jobs, and in some cases they are not even allowed outside without a male escort. That's how it should be here. Women should be treated as property of men. In the future, I think there will no longer be printed or coined currency. Instead, we will walk the streets with a couple women around our arms and trade them for various goods and services.In conclusion, go the kitchen and make me a sandwich. fuck all this elexctronic shit. Give me a typewriter, a pushbutton telephone, and a bank of teletype machines with yellow paper. Then you could make sense of this crap Now, if i were ever to meet one of you people who flames me in real life, let's just say thine attitude might change a little. Ive studied tae kwon do for 4 years, and studied kung fu as a young child. I am going to take up judo soon, and also casually jeet kune do. I lift weights every day, and have been in a fight before, and won. That's the thing, that behind the internet you can say whatever you like to me, but you know what? Im secure in the fact that i am popular in my circle of friends in real life, and dont need to be accepted in some faggot forum to boost my self esteem, i am also confident that i could kick most of thine asses in real life, so what do i care? Ok Im New To This I Posted One Picture Of Me On My Website And Now Im Trying To Post Another But All I Do Stay In The Log AndIt Says Uploading Picute May Take A Few Seconds Then I Check My Site And Nothing No Posts Or Anything Someone Please Help Yes I do like the Muslim Girls also. They get me very JIHARD. One time at camp, well let me just get to the point, It was 3am and I heard the cabin door open and all the other boys leave. Then all of a sudden i was being anally rampaged by Mr.Sunny, the counselor. He kept pillaging my raw anus until it bled. Needless to say, I still have a fear of campfires. You know what's keeping the black man black, in addition to that attitude, and that erstwhile PBS miniseries? It's affirmative action, fatty foods, cheap alcohol, tasteless jewelry, and Kwanzaa. And of course, the worst culprit. Niggers. OK WELL ONE TIME I WAS DRIVING A STOLEN POLICE CAR AND I HAD A SYRINGE HANGING OUT OF MY NECK VEIN AND I HAD A FUCKING HOOKAH IN MY LAP AND 3 DISMEMBERED CORPSES IN THE PASSENGER SEAT AND I WAS BASSING AND I TOTALLY RAMPED MY CAR AND BLEW UP THE SPACE SHUTTLE CHALLENGER by the way i can' tsee a word your saying so if you're laughing at your own comments in vain mr. wantin to complain about an ego mother fucker, then you're really truly laughing at your very own comments in vain of YOU Muslim babes turn me on. Those one's who dress entierly in a black bedsheet head to toe. I want to squirt right into the eye-slot. Fact: The word "mizer", traditionally meaning a one who is excessively frugal, was originally short for "sodomizer". This is because in the 18th century it was routine, and even expected, that the Comptroller of a business would punish wastefulness by engaging in mandatory buggery. I like terrorists who use bombs, especially nailbombs. And let me tell you why. I was once a victim of a nailbomb attack and a searing white-hot nail happened to go right up my japseye, welding itself to flesh. It was so good. The Jerk-Off Walk : Drop that trau right to your feet. Thrust your hips and beat your meat. Squelch and splurt go your oily cock. Leave the house for a jerk-off walk. Strolling the streets while you're slapping your dong. It feels so good it can't be wrong. Here comes your neighbor, eyes askew. You saunter on up and ask, What's new? A hand on your shaft and a hand outstretched, your neighbor made a gagging sound and promptly retched. Since when is a stroke against the law? You say as you start to fiddle with her bra. And there you start, right on the sidewalk. The morning rape's begun, other pedestrians gawk. She screams and hollers so you punch her face. Who cares if she dies? She's of the nigger race! Your cock already stiff begins to invade, and you twist nips proper like Marquis de Sade! Pullin out quick, and you spurt in her eye. Standing and you kick, right between the thighs. The bitch is all mangled and your cum is all spent. Your pants, at the apartment, your soft cock: bent. Now the task is done and it's time to head back. Your tired wang hangs like a rope so slack. The nigger curled up in a ball so tight, you smile as you think: This shit's done right. I hope you enjoyed my anthem true. Now best of luck and fortune, love, Mega Man II "LOCUSTS INVADE HOLY LAND..." was a deceiving web link. When I first saw it, I thought to myself: "Whoa - Locusts in Vatican City? I've got to check this out!" Unfortunately the "Holy Land" described in the link described - get this - Israel. Is there nothing those cursed jews won't do to get attention? Guys, the funniest thing about linux is that the average linux user spends from 50-75 of his (and I use the pronoun literally, because let's face it; women just have more common sense) computing time configuring and troubleshooting his operating system just to get it to run. Come on you dolts. I know you're short a chromosome but does it take a vagina to figure out that this is just stupid ? Do yourself a favor, put on a clean shirt, get a copy of windows xp, and spend that time at the gym instead of compiling your kernel endlessly. You'd be surprised how many women don't notice your complete lack of social skills! The Chub Chant: Rub a Dub Chubs Three Plumpers in Tubs - Watch them Squirm as they Wash Their Nubs - Delight in the Sight of their Big Juicy Butts - And the Sudzy Soap loving Slippery Fat Sluts - Cum Take a Dip in Our Super Sized Tub - And Sing with us Rubba Dub Chub. My favorite episode of Family Matters was when Steve locked Laura up as a joke. He stood near the vault excited at what he had done. He pressed his cheek against the metal, feeling the coolness and the tiny thumps on the door as Laura pounded for her life. Laura's screams were deep and guttural. Steve felt their vibration against his groin as he pressed against the door. Aroused by the power of life and death, he exposed himself and masturbated as he listened to Laura's screams. His eyes glazed in ecstasy as he chewed on his lower lip and jerked vigorously to his ultimate climax. Hey guys, did you ever consider what would happen if Star Trek perchance waged war with Star Wars? Who do you think might win such a conflict and why? why dont you install a real OS and make some room in your head using the space you have to devote to remembering the 100000 ways to parse a text file in linux (with zero ways to get any actual work done) this ignore list is for losers, boozers, those boring and self-whoring and folks unwilling to represent memories of Tupac and keep the dream of the Black Planet alive. I have looked at much gay porno and gotten no erections or arousal. I find it amusing. Gay culture on a whole I find grand, gays are often snobbish and excellent physical specimens which I find very admirable. Apparently everyone is up in arms about this new racist Six Flags Atlanta ride, they say it negatively portrays african americans. I guess the name is a little bit insensitive. They call it the 'Nigger Experience' and the ride is: when you get in the parking lot at the end of the day, you realize that niggers have broken into your car and stolen your stereo. I don't know what to think. Coon Tune : There exists a people called the Shitskins. They're only fit for stuffing cotton into bins. You might say "Hey thats crass!" , but you can shove it in your nigger lovin' ass. I do believe that God set it up this way, slaves for working,and a partner with which to be gay. Thats right, you heard it here first, I love my gay nigger slaves, signed Fred Durst KING GOLDI SIGNS WITH DICKSUCKERS INC and NOW LOOKING TO SIGN ALSO WITH FAGGOTS SOUTH!!!!!! PLAYA FLY IS LOOKING TO SIGN WITH SEMENLOVERS!...MEMPHIS NYGGAZ BOUT TO COME OUTA THE CLOSET..THIS IS WHAT THE INDUSTRY NEED FROM THE SOUTH...REAL FAGGOTS! Gotta Crap Rap: Poo knockin on the door, My rectum can't hold it no more. I firmly clench to keep it inside, but there's no defense for this poopy tide. My tighty whities stained with ass sweat, my quivering asshole hasn't given in yet. Holy shit I just felt a spurt, this is a disaster I could not avert. FUCK U!!!!! I WILL FIND U AND KILL U A HUNDRED TIMES SEVEN!!!!! U CAN COUNT THE DAYS ON UR HANDS THAT U HAVE TO LIVE BEFORE I SLAY YOU IN THE STREETS AND BUTCHER U LIKE A CATTLE!!!!!! NO ONE DARES TO DO DISGRACE ME AS U HAVE!!!! WATCH UR BACK, FOR I COME WITH MURDER ON MY BREATH!!!!!! Put on your party hats, its four more years of no legal pot, no stem cells, abandoning abortion, tons o' guns, throat choking pollution, Big Brother monitoring your every internet move, and best of all -- thousands more of your copatriots will die needlessly on foreign soil! I can't believe John Kerry just took a shit in his power suit at the podium. What the fuck? He can't walk off and take it to the portalet, because he's standing in feces-filled underwear at this very moment. Any change in his standing position will send his poo spilling down his legs and into view of every voter within 30 feet of him. There is no way he can play this off as a fart. It doesn't help at all that he's been on the trail for 3 months. He can hardly stand up straight! How is he possibly going to explain this to his wife Theresa Heinz-Kerry when she comes back from getting ketchup to ask him what the fuck he just did in the presence of his supporters? She'll make him drop trau in front of everyone again. There it is. The undecided voter standing below the podium to the right of him just asked if anyone could smell 'that'. He's gotta go. I've gone and done it again. After shitting on the toilet seat I took a dab of crap and worked it into my hair. Now my bald spot is a uniform brown along with the rest of my hair. I mussed up my hair enough for it to look plausible. I'm back in the conference room now and no one is willing to meet my gaze. I have to clench my stomach to keep from vomiting. My penis throbs with an intense erection. Sitting at the beach takin' a nap , didnt notice my bowels, now I've taken a crap. Sitting in the diarrhea, think I should be sayin' "Mama Mia!" Can't take it to the ocean, too fast a motion, poo would spill out in a commotion. Too stinky to be a fart, I cant stop my pounding heart. Drugs have spun me out for days, I'm in such a haze, can't explain it to my wife , my life is a maze. Pooped in front of my kids, its worse than watching shitty itty bitty titty vidz. On her command my trau I'll be droppin' , my poo will be a floppin'. Beachgoers asking if I could smell "that" , Its just my poop, smooshed in between my ass fat. Word. Adolf Hitler, the Fuhrer himself, burst into my room one eve and whisked me away on a dream vacation to the Bahamas! We toured the isles together arm-in-arm, and made love on the sandy beaches and in the clear, blue ocean. I fell in love with Hitler that weekend. Unfortunately when it was over, he disappeared, but I know that one day, mein Liebe will return and take me away to his castle in the clouds. Dick Cheney has an odd habit. This bastard loves to masturbate using Nickolodeon Gak. You know, that slimey stuff. Years ago, when he was a congressman from Wyoming, he used to come into my toy store and buy my whole stock of Gak once a month. I never asked because hey, hes a congressman. But one day I was walking around Casper and I saw Mr. Cheney in his car. He was totally naked , and was masturbating. His cock was covered entirely in this Gak! He had 2 empties in the passenger seat, and was really working his cock. I was sickened, and was about to leave when the future Vice President lowered the window and asked me to join him. I couldnt believe he said that. I jumped in the car and slurped his Gak-infused cock up ohh yeah guys i am shitting in my pants at this very moment i can feel the turds smashing against my white cotton briefs ohh yeah Asimov, I want you to fuck me in the ass please. I am dying to be anally accosted. I want to be ravaged like hog. I want you to dress like a farmer and make me oink like a pig. I want an ass reaming like no other. Asimov, I haven't had this kind of lust for you since the crazy college days. We used to butt fuck each other in the stalls. You always told me not to flush and preferred using my feces as opposed to real lubricant. ember your chocolatey member, your manhood, draped in my feces. Man, Asimov, I remember. I was day dreaming, escaping into a nether world where we used to fornicate and live in fornicatory bliss. You used to like to keep your tube socks on to enhance the gay look. We were so flitty and light on our feet. I am so very confused these days. I have difficulty conceptualizing the time that was then in contrast to now. I mea were a raging homosexual, now you wont look me in the eye because of this anime woman. I know that bitch is a transvestite, and you lust after my ass while you are being tentacle raped. You are closeting your homosexuality and denying your roots in my ass! Don't be fooled! Asimov knows how to suck a dick. He may nibble, and bite, and pretend to be sheepish at first, but deep down this cock loving acolyte of shaft licks bar maid. I am destabilizing. The world is going dark to me. I have scintillating threads of motley thoughts; my ability to control my self evanesces away! I have only an adamantine desire to see your balloon knot once again, and to have you ravage mine! Asimov - I NEED YOUR HOT MAN SEX NOW. This is your long lost butt buddy Joe, please come back. Instead of crapflooding the Slashdot I managed to literally crapflood the toilet at my workplace. I sprayed diarrhea all over the bowl, filled it with foul smelling semi-liquid and left it unflushed! Gilles de Rais had us all fooled, with his two sided life. On one end, he was a fabulously wealthy nobleman. On the other side he broke into my farmhouse , grabbed my son around the waist, and carried him off! He took him to his chateau for a glorious night of rape, followed by death by suffocation on Mr. de Rais' dong. He was nice enough to have an artist record the event, and to ejaculate in my mouth as my son died ohh yeah Willem Dafoe gave a fabulous performance with his real-life portrayal of a monstrous child molester as he smashed through my son's window, grabbed him around the neck, and raped him viciously. He was gracious enough to use lubrication, and to jerk my sons little cock back and forth ohh yeah. Hitler, Hitler, our glorious fuhrer. With all his jew gassing, he'll make the race purer! Chaps Rap : Wearing Assless Chaps, its really easy to take craps. Showing off your erect cock, such a shock, every hour is jerk-off-o'clock. Your buns in my face, I have to taste, otherwise what a waste. Jerked you off so you could tuck away, its not Gay, Balls didnt touch anyway. BongToke BongToke Two Four Six, Mari Juana Stiff long Dicks My chin is bruised from Pounding Scrote Chuggin cum made tummy Bloat Smokin Weed 4 Peace an Warez As long as theres Buttsex I've no Cares Cock Jam : Jerk That Shit Holmes, Jerk it Up. Jerk it like the world is endin', Jerk it till your mind is bendin'. Crunchy and Mushy, catbox. Jerkin' fat cocks. Pearl of the Orient, gotta represent. Pants in a tent, I've jerked it ; now I'm spent. Fact: The product Miracle Whip is named after a mythical whip used to beat slaves in the south that would turn them into highly efficient and intelligent workers. to late dip shit, I hope your not as stupid as you seem, giving me your name and email to give to my buddies down at the hate crime lab. Isn't it great to spend night after night online in the company of your best friends? Nothing like shooting the shit with your pals after a long day of watching Star Trek VHS tapes. After the long walk upstairs, it feels so good to sit down in the Archthrone of your Painkeep, rip open a new Pringles can and start sipping a freshly concocted Mountain Dew-Quik shake you call the "Polyjuice Potion" in honor of Harry Potter. (uNF Ginny!!) You call it that because after you drink it, you transform into something completely different. Your deep cyst acne clears up, you forget about your obesity, and you can chat about anime with people who genuinely care about you. After a few hours, the chat slows down and you wander over to some Russian child porn sites you subscribe to. Here's hoping the feds don't track your Citibank card! Hehe. A good long session of stroking your four inch penis finally results in a few drops of clear semen on your flabby fist, which you wipe all over your lips and chin, inhaling deeply. Finally feeling a bit drowsy, you click off your monitor and crack open your Gentoo laptop so you can finish explaining why Babylon 5 shouldn't have been cancelled while in bed. You fall heavily onto your greasy mattress which has a stained pillow and a discolored blanket half draped on it. You sleepily type in a few lines of chat while popping some throbbing zits on your cheek, making more pin point stains on your pillow. Just as you see some orange glow around the edge of your sheet draped window you decide to catch some sleep. You hate this time of night (day?) Now your loneliness hits you like a wall. Almost every real friend you've ever made has forgotten about you or is disgusted by you. Why do you act like that? Why do you LOOK like that? You represent everything they don't want to be. Why couldn't you just stay on a diet? Why carve up every last pimple until yet another bloody crater has been dug out of your cheek? Go to sleep...go to sleep, you plead to yourself. Tomorrow is Season 4 of Voyager... Seven of Nine. You like to imagine that you're on that spaceship, part of something, part of a group. But you never will be. Tears mingle with pus stains on your pillow as you squeeze your eyes shut trying to push the terrible reality of your singular aloneness. If only you had done better in school, if only you could find a job... and you remember Mom wants you to mow the lawn tomorrow morning. Goddamn it, you're turning 30 this November and you're still doing this shit. Your life is a prison and there's no chance for parole. Seven of Nine... I right clicked the clone brush over the head of the penis but when I click on the anus it puts a ballsack in there, wtf!! I've gone and done it again. It always happens when I need to keep my cool. During the seventh-inning stretch at the baseball game, I went into the urinal area and pissed right into my mouth. God, it tastes so bad. I think I got the front of my shirt all wet. I just hope we can come back from 3 runs behind. Allright, I need to get back into the stands, now that I'm refreshed. we can argue this all fucking day, and in the end it didn;t matter any more than it did when you guys started I cant go a day without punching myself. It is the only thing I get pleasure from, so I end up with bruises and I cry myself to sleep because the only thing I enjoy is painful. I tried to kill myself once, but then I stopped because my mom threw a beer bottle at me. I have been worst than offended by faggots who've sought homosexuality from me. I have never beaten a homo, but there was a time when a faggot, a brotha! and this subhuman cat approached me in a GreyHound bus terminal asking me could he give me some head!!! I would have murdered this beast but I wasn't tryna go to prison outta state where I couldn't get no bail. randomd's songs: Niggers Niggers, our dark skinned friends. If they're not out working, they'll rape your girlfriend! For jail's their domain, they're society's bane-- Let's hear it for our friend the Nigger! Linux, linux, it's free as in beer. But if you installed it, you're a goddamn queer! To clear up your pimples, the solutions quite simple-- Just take a bath and use a face wash! Jews, jews, their noses are long. They've got to clean the extra skin on their dong! They'll steal all your money, the kabelah's funny-- Let's go for the final solution! I have something resembling lava temperature pumpkin pie filling spilling from my cock and my right nut has swollen to at least 3 times the size of the other. I have a large, angry lump in my armpit that I swear makes noise, my cat shit in my bed, my sister is fucking all my friends, and someone keeps leaving little Cornish game hens stuffed with used condoms on my doorstep. I'm a 4'2", balding, port-a-let cleaner with dirty fingernails that lives with his step-mother. My dad died in an controversial felching accident when I was 5. Now they call me turd-gerbil. Instead of an asshole, I now have a nice cluster of hemorrhoidal "grapes" gently tucked between my butt cheeks and for some reason, they smell like clams. My last bowel movement was 9 days ago. They hurt so bad that every time I try to shit, I cry. Speaking of shit, a hooker shit diarrhea in my eyes four months ago... I still can't see. ONEZ ZEROZ BINARY DIGITZ HACKIN CRACKIN STAYIN UP ALL NIGHT BUFFER OVERPHLOW U GOT OWNED L33T5P34K IPARTYZ CONFIN PHREAKIN ----++++THEMENTOR++++---- BBS LANPARTY WIN NUKE OOB EXPLOITZ MATIX HEAP OVERFLOW HEX-O-DECIMALZ NO CARRIER FLIP THE BITS NULL ROUTE COMPILIN TWENTY FO HUNNERD BEE PEE ESS HAYEZ MODEM PEEK N POKE SHELLCODE COFFEE N BAWLS COCKTAILZ OCTAL SYN ACK PACKETZ LEAVE B4 U R EXPUNGED When I was a little jew, my Ima told me that if you swallow matza it stays in your colon for forty years. After I was interred I told a Nazi and he laughed until he gassed me unconscious and then bulldozed my corpse viciously into a shallow hole! YOU CAll me fagit? IN COLORS? HAVE YOU no SHAME? I will break your glasses, you nerd. I fucked Dor GITTELAMN, watch your ass, MODER FUCKER. Hey, I totally agree that she was stupid, but could you please not use the word "retarded" in this context? I know I sound like the PC police, but that's not my intention - it's just a word that really offends me. Never, never, never, never forget what subhuman Muslim Islamic pigshit terrorist filth did to the US on 9-11-01. To put the destruction into proper scale, this GroundZero photo essay helps. I've been advocating "camps for enemy combatants" since last September 12th, and I still think it's way past time to round-up Middle east suspects and intern them in the desert. The Muslims and Arabs, who are proven terrorists, should be tried by military tribunals and executed quickly. Radical Islam is an insane murder cult, and "moderate" Islam is its Trojan Horse in America. Islam is a gutter religion, full of deviant faggot girly-men, and women haters, and intolerant zealot scumbags, who aren't fit to join the modern world. Kill all Islamic, Muslim and Arab terrorist filth in the madrassas and in the US cities where they hide. When at last our orgasms had subsided, she suddenly leaned forward across me and hugged me tight, whispering in my ear, "I don't believe it! I can't believe I just took a shit in your mouth and watched you swallow it. That has got to be the wildest, hottest thing I've ever done or seen. And I've got to say that I loved doing it and watching it. I must have gone crazy at some point, but I did love it." She hugged me tighter, and I squeezed her back as I felt the pieces of shit she had dropped on my chest earlier mashing between our trembling, hot and sweaty bodies. She felt it then, too, and realized that it was smearing both of us as she crushed the turds against me. At that moment, though, she didn't care. No idea why people still code in C++ and Java. Get with the times! Macromedia Flash is gaining ground very quickly, and will soon overtake the aging "popular" programming languages. Those who have already tuned in to the wave of the future are using flash to program everything from command line utils to MMORPGs. You crusty unix programmers need to stop clinging to your old ways and modernize! low level format your hdd at once before you lose data Niggers are not just African-Americans. Some niggers are Caribbean-American niggers. And there's plenty of niggers outside of the USA too, like in Africa. Trust me, I'm an expert. I am seething with hatred for those cursed apes. "The Swastika" is the oldest cross and emblem in the world. It forms a combination of four "L's" standing for Luck, Light, Love and Life. It has been found in ancient Rome, excavations in Grecian cities, on Buddhist idols, on Chinese coins dated 315 B.C., and our own Southwest Indians use it as an amulet. I GOT SOMETHING FOR ALL U DAMN MOMS. IT SOMEWHAT RESEMBLES THE PECAN LOGS YOU GET AT CHRISTMAS. THATS RIGHT ITS A BIG BLACK PECKER! Any stupid fucking jobless fish eating rice farming waps think tou can fuck with a real person come get it you stinking fucking retarded ass mother fuckers. If you want to go back to where you came from i'll open up the ass cheeks of the world and buy you a fucking fishing trip back to your birthplace of infection. I've done it again. It always happens when I need to keep my cool. During the coffee break half way through my big sales pitch I went into the bathroom and carved "nigger" into my chest again. God, it stings so badly. I think the blood is seeping through the paper towels. I just hope my suit jacket covers me enough. All right, I need to get back into the real estate mindset again. I felt a glorious climax approaching. "Jesus we need more balloons," I grunted as I shot my load all over the assembled crowd. "More mother-fucking balloons!" As my acidic semen splashed onto them, I watched as everyone screamed and writhed on the floor in agony, their skin melting away. Oh, they would pay for taking my balloons. They would pay dearly. I wiped a tear from my eye and whispered "more balloons" as I started to fondle my balls again. This will be a long night. Niggerbabble is the unintelligible babbling that comes out of a nigger's mouth. Niggers often issue forth these babblings while grabbing their crotches, in a desperate attempt to keep their sexual organs from falling off due to the effects of the many niggerborne communicable diseases they're infested with. I just saw a preview for "Renovate MY HOUSE!", and some uppity female negro saw her new house for the first time and was shouting "THANK YOU JESUS!!!". The only way I would say "THANK YOU JESUS" is if he got rid of all the people of a certain race if you catch my drift. :D girl did you install back orifice 2000 on me because you just caused my cd tray to eject Listen, dont make me stick my finger in your dirtbox. I'll fill your gaping manhole with slimy man seed and pump some hot cock snot into your fart box. When I was little a friend told me that if you swallow chewing gum it stays in your stomach for 7 years. After I was married I told my husband and he laughed until he choked me unconscious and then raped me viciously in every hole! Hey, faggot! Those assless leather chaps are pissing me off. How can you possibly walk around in public without anything covering your erect cock, and clean shaven balls. I cant believe anyone does this for real! You should find some sort of underwear before I come over and put my hands on your genitalia, to provide some modesty! I will happily stroke your penis so it can be tucked away inside the chaps if you insist, but I'd rather you just put on some boxers. Yes, I know I have pink pants on, and a rainbow shirt. Im still waiting. Get those chaps covered up, and get your hot, tight buns out of my face before I go crazy. shut the fuck up you obviously have no idea w-t-f you are talking about why dont you give up and go back to playing yu-gi-on on your little borther's GAYCUBE because you are obviuoulsy too stupid to comprehend a real game like final fantasy 8 (argubly the best game of the series) Guys, does anyone ever have that thing happen, where you've just defecated, and are wiping yourself, and the toilet paper seems to kind of... snag, and then you realize it's sucking into your rectum and the next thing you know the cardboard tube from the toilet paper is just spinning on the holder and you've inadvertantly sucked an entire roll of quilted two-ply into your anus? Human perception is subjective. The human mind is a higly subjective thing, subject to an endless parade of subjective factors, a democratic "neuron voting" process, nutritional and hormonal factors, and so forth. Therefore, any philosophy created by humans is necessarily subjective, and so I find your so called "objectivism" laughable to a degree, which, while subjective, is still quite high. Enjoy the rape fantasies kids Do not try to sexually assault the 13 year old girl. That's impossible. Instead only try to realize the truth. There is no 13 year old girl. Then you'll see that it is not the 13 year old girl you are sexually assaulting, it is only yourself. girl you must be a drow elf sorceress because you have cast level 3 ensnare on my heart You know, I know that this sheep shit doesn't exist. I know when I put it in my mouth, the Matrix is telling my brain that it is juicy and delicious. After nine years, do you know what I've realized? Ignorance is bliss. But the funny part is, I'm not even in the matrix! It was reality!! I REALLY ATE SHEEP SHIT!! Anime? Could you be any more of a fucking useless nerd? Seriously. I know people like that who go to my high school, they wish their whole goddamned lives were anime. Probably because their parents got divorced and TOTALLY DON'T CARE when they come home and announce that they're gay or something. 201 Come back in like 10 years or something, maybe science will have developed a pill that'll make you happy and pretend that you have giant blue eyes and purple hair. Until then just keep cutting yourself and writing shitty poetry. Does anyone remember that commercial on TV where the kids would drink Yoohoo or some other beverage out of one of those juice boxes with the red and white striped straw? They would get sucked into the box and have on giant party. I always thought that if I sucked hard enough I would get to go there and party. gays don't belong here you fucking faggot with rippling muscles and clean shaven smooth skin. you need to just take your lisping moustached mouth out of here before the urge gets to be too much and you start fucking people in the ass because you're a gay fag who fucks guys in the ass and sucks dick. now put on your thong and leather pants and get out. Miatas can't handle as well as other cars or SUVs because they don't have all the weight to let the tires grip right. I'm sort of new to this linux thing, but there's this directory on my new install of Debian 3.1 called "/usr/bin". It was all messed up when I first went in there. None of the files had descriptive names, and it took me like an hour to figure out they were executables, since none of them had .exe on the end of them. Furthermore, whenever I double click them, they just pop up a command prompt for a few seconds then go away. I was gonna delete them, but I got kinda afraid that they might be my kernel, so I fiugred I'd ask. It's ok to delete this stuff, right? You would make a perfect Liberal – homosexual, self-absorbed, hates America, anxious to impose your values on everybody else. What do you call a gay jew? – A sodo-miser! Bill O'Reilly is a very important news personality, one of the only prominent news anchors who puts politics aside in favor of reporting pure facts. Democracy needs a whole lot more Bill O'Reillys to weed the propaganda out of the popular media. So, /. must be the Berekely if the internet. I don't mean in terms of actual politics, I mean in terms of the mindset that assumes everyone thinks like us, or would if they were intelligent. Ogg people are sort of like Trotskyites, when you think about it. An infinitesimal minority that tends to disrupt the conversations of others with their irrelevant diatribes. I will freak you like an animal, putting my sting in you sideways. I will hit you up doggy-style until the sun comes up. I will whisper in your ear that you are the most precious, sexiest gift of God that has ever existed in all of creation. And I will do it in sheets made of the most exotic European satin. Learning about lunix is not about compiling everything from scratch. linux is all in the configuration, not the bootstrapping and compilation. Debian's package management tools pull down precompiled binaries, automatically, with dependencies, PLUS, with a kernel-recompile and a bit of knowledge with menuconfig, you can "optimize" the kernel (which is all that really matters) to what hardware you have. Gentoo's motto: "life is too short to be spent rebooting all day, but long enough to emerge openoffice (mozilla, kde, gnome, any of the big suites.) Debian lets me install the packages, and get on with configuring them. You're not going to learn any more about linux by watching "gcc -lncurses -o main main.c -DOMGWTF" scroll by for hours. From my experiences on irc, the only reason i can see for using any non windows OS (linusex, freebsd, sun, barbieOS, macOS) is so that you can appear k-rad to your irc peers. Hi, my name is Gareth. I'm from Brisbane, Australia. I'm into emo and zines. I actually used to do sexual stuff with my father. It was kinda weird when it first happened, but it's cool now. We jerk each other off and sometimes I rub his load into my nipples. It's pretty cool. I like to taste it. It's salty. Sometimes I mix our semen together. It's like a party for our sperm. They get some "social time." For a little while we used to play with each others faeces. It was gross for a little bit, but once you get over the whole "it stinks" part, it's awesome. It's like playing with DIY play dough. That's pretty punk. I would love to play with your faeces. Some would think faeces is faeces but hot chick faeces is alot better. Yours would be THE SHIT. LOL. GET IT? i remember once my dad sleeping on the couch and something was sticking out of his pants, i thought it was a knife, so i went up to him and i touched it and tried to pull the knife off his body and he woke up with me holding his penis The lowest requirements for Doom 3 are a Pentium 4 1.6 Ghz, and as we all know the fastest pentiumIII is faster than the slowest pentium 4, so I think I'm fine. If not, I'll just wait for the Linux binary to come out so that I can run it on my ultra fast compiled-from-scratch Gentoo box. No M$ slow downs for me! Listen: Freebsd is for amateur tinkerers and college kids. Only some old fart who started working in the 90s would still use BSD for anything important. The last time FreeBSD was ahead of linux in anything was what? 1996? maybe 1998? Name anything freebsd actually does better than linux? There is never anything specific backed up by facts. It's always just some "well it's like more robust or something..." crap which means nothing and is not even true. BSD is running on fumes of hype right now, once people wake up and realize it sucks it will be all done. excuse but this person promised me he would send me shemale snuff porn if i was to send him some of mine, he lied. i sent him massive amounts of tranzgender fucking sucking,blowing and jizzing and he still hasnt returned the favor.please to not trade porn with this man on internet relay chat It's a good thing we have conscientious websites like to report this kind of stuff, it was completely ignored by the mainstream press. I live with my best friend of many years. He and I eat dinner together, watch TV together, and drink together. While we were in the living room watching TV, he asked me if I wanted to masturbate with him. I hesitantly said okay. I let him get started first and finally got the courage to do the same. I was amazed at how much I watched his penis barely looking at the women in the video. I saw him glance at me several times as well We currently masturbate together about 3 nights a week. After the first month, I told him I wanted to do what I like to but didn't want to freak him out. He said okay, and after I ejaculated on my stomach, I scooped it up and ate it. I've always done this. Just last week he shocked me by ejaculating in his hand and asking me if I wanted it. I licked it out of his hand and that was it. Can I be doing this and not be gay? i will make a point to you people that the youth cant buy doom 3 as it has a thing called an age rating, and if you dont want your children to play this game thats fine by me.You shouldnt go around trying to get things banned that us p.c gaming nuts will play and enjoy. Do something constructive like donate money too the poor or help old ladies across the street than sitting in front of a computer trying to get a video game banned. Hey shithead. If I find any of your posts modded down I'll metamod in agreement with the moderator. You are a piece of shit asshole who deserves to be modded down. Sometimes I'm convinced the only reason ipod users are so devoted/obsessed is the fact that Apple treats its customers like shit. You know, the whole abusive spouse paradigm You present a real and true perspective. A perspective of one who spends all his time surfing conspiracy websites and schizophrenic web forum postings, disregarding anything that conflicts with a predetermined conspiracist conclusion. You're just a common or garden onanist. You open with a question, but then gab on and on and on and on about yourself. You are a virgin who calls his mother every night and then sobs quietely into his imported Japanese brandy while masturbating impotently to a DVD freeze frame of Janeway with her hair a little mussed. You will never know the touch of a woman, and never have any friends outside of your widescreen 19" DVI LCD. When you die, your arteries choked with Cheetos fat at age 32, your last thoughts will be of blessed relief, and nobody will mourn your passing. My cock stayed hard after coming from his fist slamming my prostrate with each punch, the onslaught continued. He slide his fist back in elbow deep and with the other hand untied my restraints. "Now turn over on your back with my fist in your ass and then raise your legs high above your head so your cunts fully exposed" I flipped over feeling that massive arm rotating in my ass, almost making me cream again. I held my ass up high for him as he held my leg with the other arm and the fisting started again. I looked down to watch deep long fisting stokes, my asshole complaining with gurgling and sucking sounds as he pummeled my asshole.. My balls were tied of tight as I began to jack my cock "Go deep, really ruin it master!" He pulled out, wiped his hands clean and untied my balls. "Hit the showers, slutboy! Your asshole is totally wasted" I could feel huge lips flapping between my cheeks, afraid to see what he has done, I know I never shit right for a awhile. your thighs sweat from the cheap velvet of your walmart shorts, the cellulite sticks out like a sore thumb. you sit in front of your webcam with the dorito crumbs on your chest still left over from last weeks smorgasbord Do they teach english in Palestine? You stinky fucking sand nigger. That's right, I am to the Arabs as Hitler was to the Jews. My job is to exterminate every last one of your race, starting with YOU, you disgusting wretch of an Arab dog. You'll lick my boot right before you dig your own ditch, and then I'll shoot you in the back of the head. You're naked, stomach swollen, hungry, exhausted. You're my dog. If you're lucky, I won't feed your remains to the pigs. Nothing can save you from your fate, the fate of all the Arabic peoples: to be wiped off the face of the earth like the plague you are. You can try to ignore me, but let's see if you can ignore a pistol being waved in your face. You have no hope. You're stuck somewhere in the Middle East, sucking donkey cock all day because your dirty Arab hide has no other way to get nourishment. I'm in the wealthy west, sipping champagne and laughing myself to tears as I watch your race get massacred on my 40" hdtv. I'll take a dip in the cool waters of my olympic sized pool as your corpse rots in the hot equatorial sun. Touching, long handshakes, grasped buttocks, even walking hand in pocket by two males is common place in the Arab world. A considerable number of Arabs touch more between the same sex, to show liking--not sex. They hold hands at urinals, hug each other, kiss if close friends, sometimes with tongue. This is a pivotal part of Arab society that few westerners understand! GOD DAMN SKATEBOARDERS ARE GAY...YOU LITTLE FISHY CUNTS SOUND LIKE A BUNCH OF WOMEN ARGUING OVER SHOES. GOOD JOB LADIES...HOW ABOUT THIS...TAKE EACH OTHERS COCKS OUT OF YOUR MOUTHS AND GET OVER IT. THE WHOLE WORLD IS MONEY DRIVEN AND RUN, AND ALWAYS WILL BE. ILL BET MOST OF YOU ARE 15 AND HAVE NO CONCEPT OF HOW EVERYTHING REALLY IS. ITS SO EASY TO SAY ALL THE STUPID SHIT YOU ARE SAYING WHEN YOU DONT HAVE HUMAN BEINGS DEPENDING OON YOU TO SURVIVE (ie: children). OH...AND REMEMBER...FUCK ISLAM AND ANYONE OF MIDDLE EASTERN NATIONALITY....ROUND THEM UP, PUT THEM IN CAMPS AND LET THEM SIT THERE UNTIL THINGS ARE SOLVED, OR UNTIL WE DECIDE TO EXTERMINATE EACH AND EVERYONE OF THEM IN THE USA It has been brought to my attention from a fellow of mine that he fingers his asshole while he jerks off. We were talking about Ninja Turtles the other day and he was like have you ever given yourself a Donatello? And I had no idea what that meant so I asked and he said it was when you stick your finger(s) in your asshole while you jerk off. So to that I say no and ask him if he has ever given himself a Donatello, and he gives me some kind of faggish grin. So I call him a fag. He says it helps him get it up faster and cum faster. I still dont quite understand, why in the hell would you want stick your fingers in your asshole. Is there something up there special? The farthest I would ever go is wiping my ass. I just can't imagine, I mean I've licked an asshole by mistake once, but voluntarily sticking your fingers or objects in your ass while you jerk off just strikes me as vile. You see, Bob Barker was in New Jersey with a 42 year old woman. At any rate, Bob and this Jersey broad, told the Jersey broad's teenaged kids to throw pennies at hasidic jews. A cop saw it, and bid on door number one. Bob Barker had him castrated... he now goes by the moniker "High Pitched Eric." The rest is history. Ah yes, the Nazi's come to play. Wonderful, the only thing more ignorant than a homophobe is a racist. Well god help you my brother, because if your Hitler youth ass ever steps foot in GA, I will find you myself. I have problem with my sister husband. He started about a while back to bring his friend over when he visit to start acting funny with me. Because he is my sister husband I felt I could not refuse it and now it has turn to sexual acts of an improper nature. Although intercourse had never occurred he has shot his sperm on my face, placed objects in my anus and made to drink his urine. How do I stop before things go farther. Thanks. Guess what, asshole? I was one of the earliest hackers in the 1980s. I KNEW Kevin Mitnick. Phone Phreaking is as secondary to me as skullfucking your daughter. I'm going to keep calling your house, OVER AND OVER, and the phone company will NEVER be able to trace the call. You're going down. I have survived fights by always expecting at least one more attacker than what you see and [I] always expect weapons. The time that I was seriously cut? I was caught by surprise with a guy drawing a hidden straight razor. That was in my early days. I have been fortunate enough to survive attacks with my attackers presenting guns and knives. Usually two or more attackers. I have also come out of fights relatively unscathed where I faced approximately twenty gang members, several times, different occasions. Mostly knives, chains, and pipes there. ...My first fight with a gang? I was in high school ...I was determined that no one was going to get my buddy from behind. The gang guys all started taking off their belts and rolling them up on their fists. We walked out of that fight at the end of that fight and he had no more trouble from that gang as long as he lived there ...It was a stand up fight. I think I wouldn't let myself go down because I didn't want to let my buddy down. ...We showed up at the agreed upon time and place and there were about 20 of the Chinese gang members who were there to make sure there was a "fair fight." Sure, that was why there were 20 of them against the three of us and they used pipes and knives. 'Course we used nunchucks, three sectional staff, and chain whip. That ended the fight real quick. you must be real smarte to be albe to make a space robot, my parents have a dvd player thing, can you turn that into a robot, it has a lasre in it Since I was a kid I always thought of Adolf Hitler as a great leader. When I took a Holocaust class in school and the teacher preached about what a scumbag he was and how much Germany fucked up I told her to go fuck herself and I walked out a dropped the course. Everytime I see her I give a Sieg Hiel and the salute. I wish Germany won World War II and the U.S. lost miserably. The world would be such a greater, cooler place. Picking your nose and eating it is one of the best ways to stay healthy, according to a top Austrian doctor. Innsbruck-based lung specialist Prof Dr Friedrich Bischinger said people who pick their noses with their fingers were healthy, happier and probably better in tune with their bodies. He says society should adopt a new approach to nose-picking and encourage children to take it up. Dr Bischinger said: "With the finger you can get to places you just can't reach with a handkerchief, keeping your nose far cleaner. "And eating the dry remains of what you pull out is a great way of strengthening the body's immune system. U CANT FOOL ME WITH YOUR HACKED PROXY OMG DDOS DRONE NET PAQUETS REVERSE TRACE HAXORS SUB7 PAQUETS PAQUETS PAQUETS NMAP MOUNTAIN DEW HUGE ASS UNIX FREEBSD SLASHDOT OPEN SARCE DATA RAPE FIREWALLZ PAQUETZ XPLOIT VIRII DDOS SCO LUNIX PARENTZ BASEMENT What do we see? We see the figure of a muscular man laying back on some kind of rocky outcrop, resting on a piece of animal skin. His left arms is tucked behind his head, while the other drops to the side of the rock. His muscular torso is well defined while his legs are raised up and seperated so that both of his inner thighs are shown. It is clearly evident what part of the male anatomy is being emphasized here as one's eyes cannot help but focus upon the area between the thighs and alight upon the man's genitalia. The girl can probably never be said to truly enjoy the experience if she is fearful for her life or suffering the trauma's of the victimization but it still seems funny to be that if she is going to be raped anyhow than she should at least get a good fuck out of it. She smiled as she felt her finger become drenched in her mother's hot cunt juice. She was surprised. She reached into her bathrobe and pulled out Karen's panties. If her mother had not been snoring so loudly, Karen would have worried that she was in an alcohol induced coma. Karen pissed for a long time, completely drenching her mother and the bed in warm piss. My Band, although composed of 2 flute players, and almost soothing at times, is comparable to the sound of Kenny G, but our music holds messages of hate, genocide, and anal sex. We played the title track off our album, "Hitler was the World's True Leader", which talks about killing Jews and acheiving Nazi ideological clarity. No more group sex in the Jacuzzi, got it? You all kept me up until 4am, and all the chlorine in the world wouldn't get rid of the shit that I found swimming in this thing 20 minutes ago. SCIENCE TRIVIA: Did you know that the more members an instrumental rock band has, the worse they are? Studies have shown that the optimal number is zero Trolls are utterly impervious to criticism (constructive or otherwise). You cannot negotiate with them; you cannot cause them to feel shame or compassion; you cannot reason with them. They cannot be made to feel remorse. For some reason, trolls do not feel they are bound by the rules of courtesy or social responsibility. I didn't get laid. She said she was "bi but doesn't date guys", so we're just friends. God I'm such a fucking loser. So assuming that I know how to write cronjobs, bash scripts that change the color of my prompt, and DOS batch scripts, which language should I try learning first? Who is John Edwards? A Disingenuous, Unaccomplished Liberal and Friend to Personal Injury Trial Lawyers EvenFate's members form so clearly the pool of their music: the ripples of each individual's craving for creation and the ripples of music that has influenced them. Stark, bold, complex, and moving, Even Fate intends the listener to let the waves inspire them, so the waves bounce back, and inspire Even Fate you guys got no life and you have shitty computers cause you can only run old warez An Apple computer user has at least three of the following features:he is gay; he thinks he's straight, but yearns to get out the closet; loves the smooth curves of plastic; has more money than brains; always ends up "accidently" in a gay bar to "use the payphone"; has at least once fantasized about blowing Wozniak in a shower; likes running through a field of daisies; has an IKEA card; has worked as a "graphic designer" for at least two years Okay faggots, listen up. Mandatory drug tests today. Only this time, instead of pissing in a cup, you'll be pissing on each other's faces. Sure hope you like asparagus. Not only would I kick your ass if you came and said this shit to my face, I would shove your head so far up your ass, you would smell the mousse in your hair. I would also make sure I bend your your ribs sequentially and throw water on your face the whole time to make sure you remained conscious throughout the entire ordeal. Then I'd call 911 and turn myself in to the cops, make bail and go home. You'd be in pain for a long time. I'd be home, in bed. Self defense. I just heard sad news on talk radio - Laughingstock/operating system *BSD was found dead in its Walnut Creek server this morning. I'm sure we all won't miss it - even if you likely didn't use it, you've probably been served a webpage by it. Truly an icon of uselessness. If the choice of a sexual partner were protected by the Constitution, prostitution, adultery, necrophilia, bestiality, possession of child pornography, and even incest and pedophilia also would be. All of these acts should be legal as long as no one is coerced. They are illegal only because of prejudice and narrowmindedness. Some rules might be called for when these acts directly affect other people's interests. For incest, contraception could be mandatory to avoid risk of inbreeding. For prostitution, a license should be required to ensure prostitutes get regular medical check-ups, and they should have training and support in insisting on use of condoms. This will be an advance in public health, compared with the situation today. For necrophilia, it might be necessary to ask the next of kin for permission if the decedent's will did not authorize it. Necrophilia would be my second choice for what should be done with my corpse, the first being scientific or medical use. Once my dead body is no longer of any use to me, it may as well be of some use to someone. Like any red-blooded, masculine man of the male gender, I love PVC weaponry. You should too. If the concept of heading on down to the local Home Depot and transforming $100 worth of random pipe bits into a killing machine doesn’t appeal to you, you’re a goddamn pansy. Also, you’re probably sane and will live significantly longer than I will. Nonetheless you disgust me, and I take comfort in the knowledge that your obituary will be nowhere near as humorous as mine. this is how you hit on a woman, you punch her in the guts so nobody sees the damage. then you grab her stupid girly head and make her suck your cock and if she doesn't swallow and say mmm mmmm hallo i love 2 suck ur big cock please give it to me baby" then you need to rape her in the butt ok don't let these little sluts get away with showing their tummies and bra straps you know they want to be fucked so just fuck them niggers must really throw some nasty shit out. because you know damn well they'd treasure most of what white people throw out. I hope you have an ulcer and vomit your guts all over the ground, and then I'll do a saucy jig on your entrails while you lay face down bleeding out your nose, mouth and ass. then when you are almost dead I'll jerk my cock hard and start throat fucking you your stomach juices will make for a spicy lubricant. your last earthly sensation will be of hot jizz squirting down your throat, and your death rattle will be more of a death gurgle as you belch out your last breath in the form of a cum bubble Cassini Probe touched Saturn's junk liberally. It strapped its camera into Saturn's rings and wouldn't keep its offensive snapshots off it. It was performing many red-filter image captures. Saturn couldnt believe what the fuck was going on. Saturn told the Cassini probe that the solar system would not approve of a human-manufactured orbital device taking pictures of a gas-giant for free. It doesnt help at all that the probe has been enroute for seven years. I hardly had time to prepare and hide the massive alien population living on me. How am I possibly going to explain that to the scientists who analyze the images in detail? They'll make me drop rings in front of all the other planets again. There it is. The aliens are recieving a transmission from SETI. I gotta go to a different solar system.} \nanyways\ i\ had\ a\ dream\ where\ i\ was\ sol\ badguy\ from\ guilty\ gear\ x\ well\ i\ had\ \nall\ his\ powers\ but\ i\ looked\ like\ me\ which\ made\ it\ 10x\ more\ badass\ and\ i\ was\ \nhella\ fighting\ people\ and\ i\ had\ a\ dreamone\ time\ i\ was\ venom.\ but\ i\ looked\ \nlike\ me,\ and\ my\ suit\ was\ way\ iller\ =\\\n UMMMM OK WHO ARE YOU? WHERE DO YOU LIVE? I WILL MEET YOU WHERE EVER AND WHEN EVER YOU WANT AND I WILL FIGHT YOU. UR A BITCH ASS NIG-GA TALKIN @# $ LIKE WHO YOU ARE. DONT MAKE A GAY RESPONSE TO THIS AND SAY "O UR NOT COOL, I WONT FIGHT YOU, IM NOT TELLING YOU WHERE I LIVE" I DONT CARE HOW OLD YOU ARE I WILL STILL F-UCK YOU UP. @# $. UR PROBABLY A SAND NIGGER. STUPID SAND NIGGERS ALWAYS GETTING INVOLVED IN STUFF Aren't you a bit fucking fat to ride a horse? what gives you the guts to call yourself a cowboy? you probably haven't been outside in so long you probably don't even know what a horse even looks like. cowboy my ASS. you fucking poseur. you are just a nerd. go back to your computers and slashdot. a horse could whop your ass any day. I even named my computer mouse Scabbers after Ron's pet in the Harry Potter books. It's really fun. Sometimes I'll talk to it while I'm working as though it's a real pet. "Hey Scabbers, I'll give you some cheese if you open that .exe file." Or something like: "Scabbers, you little rascal, did you just cause my computer to freeze?" You know what? I took the plunge and installed Linux today. Top Hat or some hat version. But now I have a problem. Im getting these big red lesions all over me. Im not allergic to anything that would cause that, and I havent become infected with any diseases, my doctor checked me out fine. Then I figured out what Linux really is. Open Sores. Linux is killing me! Help! ok. i installed linux. and it brought up this screen. i needed login and password. i finally figured out to put "root" as login but then i brings up this thing like [root@localhost root]# now what the fuck am i supposed to put there guys do you know when tupac is coming home? Im worried about him. He wears a bulletproof vest so he usually is safe. but i made supper for him and he hasnt come home yet! his potatoes and shake n baked chicken are starting to get cold! The worst terrorist attack in recorded history occurred just a two and a half years ago, followed by a Holy War against Islam, and now Israel and the Palestinians as well as India and Pakistan are teetering on the brink of their own war, Argentina is in the midst of a financial crisis, America is considering launching attacks against North Korea and Syria, and you people have the gall to be discussing video games???? My *god*, people, GET SOME PRIORITIES! The bodies of the thousands of innocent civilians who died (and will die) in these unprecedented events could give a good god damn about video games, your childish image macros, your nerf toy guns and whining about the lack of a fun workplace, your Everquest/Diablo/D&D fixation, the latest American Idol episode, or any of the other ways you are 'getting on with your life' (here's a hint: watching American Idol in your jammies and eating a bowl of Shreddies is *not* 'getting on with your life'). The souls of the victims are watching in horror as you people squander your finite, precious time on this earth playing video games! You people disgust me! If you expect companies to follow the copyright of the GPL, you should support the RIAA going after infringers of its copyright. If not, you're a hypocrite. AHAHAHAHAHAHHHAHAHHAHHAH YOU FAGS ACTULLY THINK NINTENDO BEAT XBOX HAHHAHAHAHAHH HOW AMUSING HAHAHHAHAHAHHAHHAHHAHHHHHAAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH JUST GIVE IT UPHAHHAHHA YOUR NOT GOING TO WIN !!HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAH!!!!!!! A NEW GAME COMING TO GAY CUBE CALLED PRINCESS NINTENDO IT COMES OUT THE SAME TIME HALO 2 COMES OUT WHILE ILL BE PLAYING HALO 2 YOULL BE PLAYING PRINCSS NINTENDO AHHAHAHHAHAH HELP MASTER BILL GATES CONQER THE WOURLD AND LET THE EVIL EMPIRE RING HAHAHHHAHH JOIN I THINK ALL GC / PS2 OWNERS SHOULD BE SHOT IN A FIELD DAM PS2 SUCKS AND GC SUCKS DAM SHAME THE GC IS WINNIG OVER THE PS2 HAAHAAHAHHA SEE BILL GATES OUR XBOX LEADER WILL WIN US TO VICTORY DONT BE MAD BECUSE YOU BOUGHT THE WRONG SYTEM JUST BUY AN XBOX NOW!!! AND SPARE YOUR SELF WHEN BILL WINS THE COSOLE WAR!!! HAHAHAHAHHHHAHHAHHAH7TH COLUM!!!!!1!1 GUES S WHAT YOUR USING BILL GATES COMPUTER ARENT YOU GAME CUBE PEPOLE HAHAHHAHHAHAHHAHHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHHAHAHBILL GATES OWNS YOU HAHAHHAHAHHAHAH!!! ENJOY ZELDA MASTER QEST WHAT A GAY GAM HE WILL NEVER KILL MC LINK IS A FAGGOT THAT CAN TUN INTO A FUCKING KID !! ENJOY SUCKY GRAPHICS. Or maybe i snatched your ip out of the irc stream and ran a backwards trace against it, but hey, who knows right? Security exists for those who do not know how to break it. God damn it. I am sick of these extremist arab fucks. I wish we would turn the region into green glowing glass. Don't feed me this "america caused it" bullshit either, they are a bunch of fucking animals and should be treated as such. YES WE KNOW IT HAS DUAL XEONS NOW FOR FUCKS SAKE WILL YOU STOP TWISTING EVERY SINGLE CONVERSATION AROUND JUST SO YOU CAN MENTION IT YOU STUPID, PATHETIC, WHINING, LIFELESS VIRGIN PIECE OF SPOILT RICH-KID BUTTSUCKING SHIT Batman whipped out a cease & decist from his utility belt. he slinked towards me slowly like a g thug. "I believe this is for you" batman bellowed. just as i was about to reach and grab the legal paper Batmans hands thrusted towards my bean bag and he squeezed me into a coma. now its 10 years later. i have woken up. something smells funny. there is the batman symbol on my bed as a shitstain. i have been violated. Hi, my name is Najeeri Mongo and I am a quadrapelic who is deaf, dumb, and blind. I also have a very blunted sense of touch. I have spent months learning to read braille with my mouth so that I can come onto the intenet and ask you all to help me. One of the care workers is touching my penis, a lot, and no one seems to be doing anything about it. Please respond if you can help me. Have you eaten ground beef recently? Ground beef is the result of everything outside of the cow's bones (including nerves) being ground up. Ground beef often contains prions (misfolded proteins) which due to mammalian protein metabolism act virally and will cause you to come down with Creutzfeldt-Jakob Disease (CJD) where your brain slowly decays due to holes forming in your brain, as the proteins in your body lose their ability to fold properly. Do you feel as smart as you were last week, or last month? You may have it. PS- you'll fail at everything you ever try. Leave writing to the pros, sit back, and feel the germs crawling all over your amoeba-like body. What's that? Did you leave the oven on? Sorry, I'm so itchy, I can feel tiny mites burrowing into the skin of my scalp, behind my ears, biting my ankles, god, they'll go right through to my brain if I don't scratch them out. I just remembered that I need to go refold all my clothes! (¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯) (¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯) FOUR HOTDOGS (¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯) (¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯) YOU'RE DOOMED TO A LIFE OF LONELINESS YOU WILL NEVER FIND ANYONE WHO TRULY LOVES YOU EVEN YOUR PARENTS REGRET YOUR BIRTH YOU SPEND ALL YOUR TIME CHATTING WITH FAKE FRIENDS ON THE MODEM AND YOU SPEND THE REST OF YOUR TIME PLAYING WITH OPERATING SYSTEMS AND OTHER BORING SHIT GO BACK TO WATCHING TV BECAUSE THAT ESCAPIST SHIT IS THE BEST YOU WILL EVER GET FAGGOT DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE TIT ASS NIGGER I HATE FAGS, NIGGERS, KYKES, CUNTS(IF IT BLEEDS IT DON'T FUCKING VOTE IF YOU ASK ME YOU FUCKING FAGS), SPICS, SLANT EYED SLOPE ASS SMALL DICKED COMPUTER USING BAD DRIVING THIEVING CHINAMEN/JAP/GOOK DUMBASS MOTHER FUCKERS NOW ALL YOU ALL MOTHER FUCKERS BETTER GET WITH ME AND HOP ON THE WHITE TRAIN. FUCKING NIGGERS DON'T HAVE SHIT ON MY WHITE MAN RIFLE, YOU WANNA KNOW WHY WE OPRESS YOU? ITS BECAUSE YOU DIRTY THIEVING NEGROES SMELL LIKE A WHORE'S ASSCRACK AND DESERVE EVERY PELLET OF BUCKSHOT IN MY POINT BLANK SHOTGUN BLAST TO YOUR FILTHY GUTS. O'Brien broke my will liberally. He sent me to room 101, strapped the rat cage on my head, and would not keep his offensive rodents off me. He was performing many red flag tortures. I could not believe what the fuck was going on. I told O'Brien the Spirit of Man would not approve of the Head of the Outer Party torturing the last humanist for free. It doesn't help that the Ministry of Love has been holding me prisoner for months. I can barely recognize myself! What am I going to tell Julia when she comes back from room 101 to ask me why the fuck I told them to take her instead of me? She'll make me commit thoughtcrime in front of everyone again. There it is. The table next to mine is standing up for the Two Minute Hate. I gotta go. I love Big Brother! Saying that Java is nice because it works on all OS's is like saying that anal sex is nice because it works on all genders. The planes on 9/11 must have run Windows ME because they sure crashed quickly. Not a lot of uptime, if you get my drift. I'm selling a wireless Dreamcast Modchip, you dont even need to open it up! you put it just to the right of your console (where the fan is) and it will work. I have 10 on stock, 5$ each, or 10 for 45$ , msg me if you are intressted Your hands are filthy, covered in vast amounts of fungi, bacteria, and viruses. Underneath your fingernails is even worse. Also, the stove is on. I think the PRESIDENT is the BOMB. SHOOT, sometimes, I think about GEORGE W. BUSH and wonder if he would like the ISLAMABAD deli on 14th st here in WASHINGTON, DC. I think the falafel is to DIE for. Or even to KILL for. It's so good it makes me wanna declare a falafel JIHAD on all the other INFIDEL falafel stands in the capital -- from those near THE WHITE HOUSE to those near CAPITAL HILL. they give me heartburn, though. it's like they ASSASSINATE my belly. it really KILLS me. the link is only old because you are a loser and have nothing better to do than FIND THE MOST CUTTING EDGE LINKS ON THE INTERNET. A recent incident (last night) not really wanking but being wanked. My gf was tossing me off in her parents spare bedroom as she didn't like giving me head, as she always thought it might "taste funny". Anyway, lying bollock naked, being careful not to make too much noise, my gf suddenly, and without warning decided to suck my boaby. I let out a "gWaARgh!" and started spewing a massive amount of testicular dairy into her mouth. Her dad then burst in to o see what I was doing to his daughter, she shits herself, and sprays my cum all over me. I was nearly sick, and she just pissed herself lauging. Her Dad dissapeared very quickly, and has been making subtle jokes ever since in the presence of everyone! your modem touched my junk liberally. he strapped me in to his comms rack and he couldnt keep his offensive rj11s off of me. he was performing many red flag RX/TXs. i couldnt believe what the fuck was going on. i told your modem the internet would not approve of a telecom device touching an underage kid for free. it doesn't help at all that your modem has been lagged to hell after touching everyone's junk. he can hardly whistle at 300 baud after touching Chali's diseased junk. how is he possibly going to explain this to the internet when he is responsible for 99 packet loss? they'll make him drop carrier in front of the whole network again. there it is. al gore just called and asked why your modem hasn't responded. he has to go. Turn ons include: Star trek TNG slasher fanfics (_NO_ rikker) and fabricating an intricate web of self delusion. Turn offs include the word "Kawaii" and the rancid smell of my own festering ass-crack. John Stamos is getting divorced just as the Olsen twins turn 18. Coincidence? I think not. I think someone is going to be entering the backdoors of two little houses very soon. Did you know that spiders cannot physically die of natural causes? If kept safe, a spider can continue to live and grow larger for a theoretically unlimited amount of time. In fact, in China there exists a collection of 'holy' spiders, hatched some 2,800 years ago during the height of the Mang-Tsun dynasty. Hitler was a horrible monster. Is it even worth debating? He was a failure as a leader and a human being; this is universally accepted. Why even discuss the actions of this mad demagogue? I mean, think about it... the guy rises to a position of absolute power, with (arguably) the most powerful army in Europe. He's Blitzkrieging all over the place, Churchill is trying to appease his demands to avoid a full-out war, he's essentially unstoppable: and then comes the horror of the Holocaust. What kind of demonic possesion would cause a man in his position to use his power to practically wipe out the jewish people and culture in Germany? The final death toll was estimated at 4-6 million jews, despite the -years- in power that they could have been executing the Jewish people. The death toll could have been much, much higher. Hitler was a disgrace to the human race, more a monster than man. Even discussing his actions, despite his motives, is an affront to all that is pure and good. The most unfortunate thing is that he took his own life before the proper punishment could be bestowed on him for his terrible failure. Taking an idea that I came up with a few years ago, but just never found time to execute (well they really didn't steal this idea) they took the original Legend of Zelda "overworld" theme for the Nintendo Entertainment system, put a stronger beat over it, and turned it into a great rap song. XTC RAVEZ CANDY VISORZ WATER BOTTLEZ LOVE PEACE TRIPLE STACKED PAUL OAKENFOLD PLUR GLOWSTIX LOCKJAW PACIFIARS TURNTABLES PLUR EX STROBE LIGHTS LASER SHOW UNDERGROUND RAVE RAVE RAVE XXX FUCK FUCK FUCK LOVE EVERY1 KANDY BRACELETZ ACID WEED POT DRUG DRUG DRUG SPESHAL K TRANKWILIZER EXXXST that does it. i am going to write a 4 panel gag manga about this very situation, and it's going to cast you in a very unfavorable light. hello are you familiar with playagain website if not maybe you can still help i have downloaded a file from there, but not just there a chd file using bittorrent and the file i cannot open th extract whats in there i do not have a program to open it or even know what format it's in the file has a white backgroung and a microsoft windows flag on it. please help I just ate some fried chicken. The breasts were juicy, and the buns were soft and warm. Afterwards, the division manager of Popeyes came up to my table and asked me how the meal was.I said I was satisfied, but the meal lacked a certain je ne sais quoi. He apologized profusely, and said he had something to show me that would make up for it. He lead me to the back of the popeyes, to a room soaked from floor to ceiling in blood. In the center of it was a live horse, chained by all four legs to the structural supports of the warehouse like room. As I watched, employees of the popeyes cut large sections from the horse, which was whinneying and screaming in horror, the remaining sections of its body covered with festering sores and a froth of sweat. The popeyes employees took the chunks of horseflesh and sliced them into pieces, then they rooted around through the bags of trash strewn around the room to find discarded chicken bones. They quickly tenderized the meat with sledgehammers and fed it into a machine which formed the horsemeat around the bones, then they breaded and deepfried it. I asked the division manager why he had led me back to this place, and he pointed at the steed's rump, the diseased asshole puckering rythmically with terror, squirting pus with each convulsion. We're just about to use that section, would you like a crack at it first?} I quickly unzipped my pants and wasted no time jamming my erect penis into the stallion's defenseless asshole. With each thrust, I donkey punched the horse in the back of the head, making it clench its ass even tighter. I came just as the horse died. I was delighted. Popeyes definitely went the extra mile to make me a satisfied customer. Eat your own shit. That's a great way to start then move on to another hot guy's load. The smell is a big turn-on for me and that gets me going and wanting to eat the guy's shit. My first experiences with was a guy smoking a cigar...and I gotta be honest, that still gets me going.It helps if you have a feeder who can feed me slow and not all at once...but then some guys like it all it once I guess...different strokes for different folks. What I would suggest for someone who finds the smell harsh is try eating slowly if possible and holding your breath at will come with time if you let it.Sometimes it helps to lie under a rim seat with a mirror nearby so you can see how much your partner is enjoying it too...this is a real turn on for pleasure gets me pleasure I find...and vice versa... There is a new online code out, kinda lol and brb. This one is a little different though. You all know how it feels when you're talking to someone online,and your Mom is standig right behind you, reading every word that is on the screen.Then of, course,the other person swears or talks about how much you luv your crush or something and your Mom reads it and tells you to get offline that instant, and not talk to that person anymore. Well, what can we do about that? To solve this problem, now we have started the {Code 9} system. In code 9, u simply press 9 when your parent or sibing is watching over your shoulder as you type That way, the other person will know what you are talkin about, and begin a conversation about homework or something. When your Mom or dad leaves, press 99 to let the person know that they r gone, so u can have a normal conversation again. NOW, SEND THIS TO EVERY1 YOU KNOW, SO CODE 9 CAN GO INTO EFFECT!!! IT IS VERY IMPORTANT YOU SEND THIS EMAIL TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW>> BEST DAM WAY TO COOK COLLAD GREENS BE REAL DAMN SIMPLE. SNATCH 2 O' 3 DEM PUFFED HAM HOX N PUT EM IN SOME FAT ASS POT WIT SOME WATA. BRING DA SHIT TO A BOIL N LET DAT SHIT BOIL FO 4 HOURS. ADD MO WATA BITCH BFO YO ASS GONNA LET DAT SHIT DRY OUT LIKE A MOFUKKA. DA BRAINSTORM BE TA LET DAT SHIT BOIL TIL DEM HOX BE ALL FALLIN PART N SHIT. COOK EM REAL DAMN THOROUGH OR A NIGGA BE GETTIN LOCKJAW. GRAB DA GREENS AN SEPARATE DEM LEAVES. BDP USE DA SCREEN OFF THA NAYBUHS CRIB. TASTE DEM GREENS, MAKE SURE THEY BE ALL SPICED UP LIKE A NIGGA ON A MEXI HO N FLAVA IF NESSARY. SERVE WIT CHIITLINS. NOW U BE KNOW WHAT GREENS BE LIKE BEAT DOWN POSSE STYLE. While jerking off with some sort of lubricant, mount something like the corner of the bathroom sink so that your balls are rubbing. This adds intense pleasure to your nut sack. Also, try lubing up something like your toothbrush handle and stick it up your ass while hits the G-spot nicely. Software piracy is WRONG! You are stealing from hard working programmers. Your IP HAS been noted, and is being forwarded to the SPA with a reccomendation that they investigate your CRIMINAL activity. Please delete all your pirated software before you are arrested! Linux is illegal! You are breaking the law, and hurting yourself and your family with your ILLEGAL SOFTWARE. Your ip has been noted and is being forwarded to the SPA with a reccomendation that they investigate your CRIMINAL ACTIVITY. Please destroy all your unpatriotic linux software before you are arrested! I'm a guy and my friend is a guy and for whatever reason I've always wanted to ejaculate in his face. For his birthday one year, I decided to bake him a birthday cake. In the middle of the baking, I decided I'll ejaculate in the cake. He ate the cake. Therefore I indirectly ejaculated in his face. My favorite way to masturbate is to purchase some Nickelodeon Gak. For those who don't know its a strange little gel substance that's really cold and slippery. It makes me feel like I'm having sex with an alien. CALLING ALL 3RD GRADERS! How can you people think this game is entertaining? i bet you also like pokemon, rayman, tak and the power of really stupid games, and megaman battle network. why dont you grow up and play some real games like Resident Evil. Oh wait, i forgot, your too dumb and your mommy wont let you buy M-rated games. BOOO-HOOO! or the greatest game ever forged by mankind....DIABLO 2!!! MMMM........mmmm i'm abit confusing right now......why will they eat their own poo-poo where it smell so terrible? Actually, mushu is very good in her toilet training. She'll only pee & poo on the newspaper i prepared for her. But she eats it when i'm away! After i beat her twice, she seems to bark at the poo first before she goes near it. Then she'll smell it & play with it. Then she'll put everything into her mouth!!!!! Yucks!!! But i didn't get the chance to see it but my housemates did. yeah it si ok bcuz if an older hamster itz his\her own poo they get the mineral and vitamins thats left behind and was missed so it go though 2 times and for the babys it is ok bcuz they need to eat the older hamster poo so their stomach can get the bacteria and other stuff so it can help the baby im not saying to pick up poo and stick it in the nest they willd o it them self......(you wont see them) 2 to the izzle and 3 to the shizzle, see you on the flopside. your friend, Riley Michel My band, although hardcore, and almost scary at times, is comparable to the sound of Limp Bizkit, but our music holds messages of much value. We played the title track off our album, "This Road," which talks about working hard to achieve goals in life. I FOUND THIS REALLY COOL GAME CALLED EVERQUEST EVER HEARD OF IT LET ME TELL U ABOUT MY ADVENTURES BTW I USE CHEETO CRUMBS FOR BABY POWDER WHEN I GET MOISTURE PROBLEMS IN MY CROTCH my name is Akmar and i am 7 yrs old and dad tied me in the basement and tell me to have all dos game by 7 o clock or i get no food plz help I'm not a goth. Many goths say this, but I'm really not one. Well, OK, I wear black. And I like goth music. And regularly go to goth clubs. Argh, and I've been known to wear silly goth outfits when I go. But I'm still not a goth. I've learned over the last week that I really like oral sex. I've learned that every guy tastes differently and overall I like the taste. But. Cum is best served fresh and hot. Cold cum is not my idea of a good meal. I may not be as tech savvy as Linus Torvalds, but I know my way around the Windows registry. I really cant wait to get the money for the full version and my own server with my clan so I can kick fags. Its amazing to me the capacity some people have for being assholes and losers in a video game IRAQI PRISONERS TORTURED? THIS IS NO DIFFERENT THAN WHAT HAPPENS AT THE SKULL & BONES INITIATION...I'M TALKING ABOUT PEOPLE HAVING A GOOD TIME. THESE PEOPLE -- YOU EVER HEARD OF EMOTIONAL RELEASE? YOU EVER HEARD OF NEEDING TO BLOW SOME STEAM OFF? "If a man finds a girl who is a virgin, who is not engaged, and seizes her and lies with her and they are discovered, then the man who lay with her shall give to the girl's father fifty {shekels} of silver, and she shall become his wife because he has violated her; he cannot divorce her all his days." (Deuteronomy 22:28-29, NASB) Can you imagine the mental torment and terror such a woman would endure after being married to her rapist? Christ clearly came to destroy Judaism and had nothing but contempt for the Jews. He rejected their laws and customs, called them the spawn of Satan, and basically condemned them to hell. How can anyone deny that the Jews were directly responsible for the death of Christ when Christ himself directly blames the Jews prior to his death? There is no Judeo-Christian religion, tradition, or anything else. There is a war between God and the children of Satan (Jews) that God will win, but nothing else. To speak of a Judeo-Christian tradition, is like speaking of a Satanic-Christian tradition. Yo, dawg, are you hitting on me? God, I hate fags! I wish one was here right now. I'd make him fuck me up the ass and jerk off all over my face. And then I'd lick his nipples while cupping his balls in my hands and be like, 'Is that how you like it? Huh? Is that how you like it, fag?' And then I'd make him take a dump on my chest while I masturbated. That'd teach that goddamn queer. I'm Jordan. I just wanted to see what my rating is, so please be honest. I'm a good guy with a nice heart, and I love to read poetry. I am a full time christian and I love the world. Live life to the fullest. Peace. Ever since I was three I knew that something was something different in my sexual preferences, as time went on I realized that I liked anime babes and Hentai. Ever since then I have been looking at anime porn and such, I`m not attracted to real girls that much. If I see a girl naked I won`t like it but If I see hentai I`m all in for it. Since I`m a christian I`m wondering if God made me this way for punishment or something, I don`t blame him at all. He didn`t have to make me anyway so I thank him for simply making me. Anyway is it normal for me to like anime babes or not? Should I tell my parents or hide this secret from them? I`m looking at this HOT anime babe in her bra and panties and I`m hard as heck! But is this a sin? Like you've ever been to an arcade. The skin on your back would peel off if you ever extricated yourself from your oily throne of cheeto crumbs and mountain dew stains. Im in the middle east. Middle eastern people may have dark skin like a grl.......face it bitch...ur a motherfuckin dick suckin man hoe!!!!!!!!!.........ur a faget ass punk pussy lil girl......ur da gayest person ever........go to hell bitch!!!! your fuckin gay you should be shot and put in a gas chamber you fuckin peice of trailer put your moms dick back in your mouth and shut the fuck up the song fuckin rules I…AM…CAUSING…YOUR…XTERM…TO…SCROLL…THE…CAUSE…OF…YOUR…XTERM…SCROLLING…IS:…ME… I thought ocd was like a car, too, but then my psychiatrist suggested that I don't have to wash and wax my car and walk around it three times every time before I drive (some of the paint is comming off, and it is only a 2002 lumina) so I tried not doing it and that very same day, I got in a car accident and they had to amputate part of my foot. Luckily I walked around the car ONCE, or I might have been killed! I used to think cutting was self destructive, but that was before it made me rich, famous, and helped me meet the love of my life. Boy am I glad I never put down the razor! If you care about yourself, cut EVERY DAY. If your boyfriend has OCD, you can Trick him out of it. Try moving his car keys when he's not looking, changing the ingredients in his food, swich his computer to spanish text by default, make subtle hints that you are sleeping around on him. This will jog his brain into working correctly, and he'll know you're only doing it because you love him! If your son has requested a new "processor" from a company called "AMD", this is genuine cause for alarm. AMD is a third-world based company who make inferior, "knock-off" copies of American processor chips. They use child labor extensively in their third world sweatshops, and they deliberately disable the security features that American processor makers, such as Intel, use toprevent hacking.AMD chips are never sold in stores, and you will most likely be told that you have to order them from internet sites. Do not buy this chip! This is one request that you must refuse your son, if you are to have any hope of raising him well. There are, unfortunately, many hacking manuals available in bookshops today. A few titles to be on the lookout for are: "Snow Crash" and "Cryptonomicon" by Neal Stephenson; "Neuromancer" by William Gibson; "Programming with Perl" by Timothy O'Reilly; "Geeks" by Jon Katz; "The Hacker Crackdown" by Bruce Sterling; "Microserfs" by Douglas Coupland; "Hackers" by Steven Levy; and "The Cathedral and the Bazaar" by Eric S. Raymond. Did you Europeans quit when you were behind in your butchering Jews like unwanted fetuses? Don't bother booting up En Carta, genius, the answer is no. My yarmulke wearing Sergeant Grandpa had to fly his jet over there and knock the gas chamber remote out of your assy smelling fingers himself. And while he was at it I think he popped a WWII era cap right in your sunken euro-chest. I'll never forget the stories he told me about how he and his buddies and a bunch of foxy WAVES liberated ol' San Francisco from you slanty-eyed motherfuckers. Another Infected Dick Sucker - that's what AIDS stands for. I'm going to live to see the day you queers die a horrible death. There's no reason for you to be here on earth. So let me guess, you were one of those guys late up at night. jobless, and tired of going to your dead end job, until you saw a commercial for an exciting career in "Information Technology!" offered by the DeVry institute where you will be trained in as little as 3 months in the field of INFORMATION TECHNOLOGY! Promising you the career of $50,000 a yearAnd now with this knowledge and your A+ certification, you join random channels in irc in the hopes of you connecting with other INFORMATION TECHNOLOGY! professionals so you can show off your shiny new {Certificate of completion} from the DeVry institute. The Quran requires the infidel, whether Jew or Christian, to be killed. ... That's a core essence of the religion. ... Muhammad was a pirate who killed infidels and who advocated the killing of infidels. Not a nice guy. Osama bin Laden is in keeping with his fine tradition. BSD, Lunix, Debian and Mandrake are all versions of an illegal hacker operation system, invented by a Soviet computer hacker named Linyos Torovoltos, before the Russians lost the Cold War. It is based on a program called "xenix", which was written by Microsoft for the US government. These programs are used by hackers to break into other people's computer systems to steal credit card numbers. They may also be used to break into people's stereos to steal their music, using the 'mp3' program. Torovoltos is a notorious hacker, responsible for writing many hacker programs, such as 'telnet', which is used by hackers to connect to machines on the internet without using a telephone. I'm all talk? Lets meet at a secluded place and I'll show you how much talk I am you pussy. I'll burry you so deep that your mommy will litter all of California with your missing posters. I JUST HAD THIS FREAK ACCIDENT WHERE I SAT DOWN TO WORK AND I SPILLED DOPE INTO THE BONG AND THE LIGHTER FLICKED OUT AND SET IT ON FIRE AND THE WHEELS OF MY CHAIR SLIPPED BACK AND I INHALED THE DOPE SMOKE AND ATE A MUFFIN EFnet split my junk liberally. It strapped me into its splitting server and would not keep its offensive lag off of me. It was performing many red flag timeouts. I told EFnet dalvenjah would not approve of its servers impersonating DALnet for free. It doesn't help that EFnet has been run by nazis for eight years. Its hubs can barely stay up! What is EFnet going to say to comstud when he comes back from a Dianora blow job and asks what the fuck EFnet just did in front of 120,000 users? He'll make the hubs squit in front of all the opers again. There it is. They just relinked I gotta go. Finally, a break from the linux tax. Yeah, you know the one -- the one that makes you pour hundreds and hundreds of wasted man-hours into using poorly written programs with little or no documentation. What can you expect from spaghetti code written by hobbyists and students? I'll happily give my money to the professionals any day, no matter what News for Nerds declares. Honestly, I know most of you agree with me! IF U R ON DIZ LIST, WTACH OUT!!! U R A MARKED MAN (OR WOMAN), I WILL HAV MY VENGEANCE ON U ALL!!! U SHALL FEEL MY WRATHLY WRATH, U SHALL RUE DA DAY U MADE AN N.A.ME OF DA MAD MATRIX HA><0R!!@#!$ When the hell will all those people just curl up and die? I'm so heartily sick of that mustachioed hippie free-love deviant ESR spouting his OSS filth. When will he realise that he's made all the money he possibly can from it, and it's time to just shut up and move along now? Humidity overheated my junk liberally. It strapped me into its ambient temperature and would not keep its offensive moisture off of me. It was causing many red-flag heat strokes. I could not believe what the fuck was going on. I told humidity that the Weather Network would not approve of a cool front coming out of the Gulf Stream for free. It doesn.t help that the Humidex has been at 40 for weeks. I can barely walk straight! What am I going to tell my wife when she comes back from getting ice to ask why the fuck I.m towelling off my balls in the presence of our children? She.ll make me drop trau and use deodorant in front of everyone again. There it is. The guy across the street just asked if anyone could smell .that.. I gotta go shower. HOT XXX YOUNG CUMSHOT WATERSPORTS ANAL FUCK BRITNEY SEX GRANDMA CUTE VOYEUR LATINA FACIAL HENTAI PORN JACKOFF PUSSY ANAL SEX BLOWJOBS BACKDOOR HERSHEY HIGHWAY CUMSHOT TEABAG $$DVDA$$ TITTY FUCK DIRTY SANCHEZ $DOUBLE PENETRATION$ JAPSCAT $GOLDEN SHOWER$ LATTE ENEMAS $TVTA$ SKULLFUCK DOGGYSTYLE MISSIONARY $QVQA$ !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!DIRTY HORSE BEASTIALITY KIDDY PR0N LOLITA.MPG.JPG.AVI.DIVX.BMP.MOV.PIF BANG BANG ALLAH MECCA KORAN AL AQSA BIN LADEN SHAHID YA SADDAM YA HABIB UTRUB UTRUB TEL AVIV FILIN FILTIN FILYALLA FALESTIN $$TURBAN$$ AFGHANISTAN WAR ON TERROR W.T.C 9/11-NEVER 4-GET JIHAD HEAVEN AL AQSA AL ABDALLAH YA SHARIF AL QAEDA THE SHAYKH EMIR ABU ABDALLAH IN SPIRIT AND IN BLOOD WE WILL FREE JERUSALEM AND ABU AMAR MATADERRA MATADERRA HAJJ NUJAHID ALLAH EMIR AL HABIBBI XTC RAVEZ CANDY VISORZ WATER BOTTLEZ LOVE PEACE TRIPLE STACKED PAUL OAKENFOLD PLUR GLOWSTIX LOCKJAW PACIFIARS TURNTABLES PLUR EX STROBE LIGHTS LASER SHOW UNDERGROUND RAVE RAVE RAVE XXX FUCK FUCK FUCK LOVE EVERY1 KANDY BRACELETZ ACID WEED POT DRUG DRUG DRUG SPESHAL K TRANKWILIZER EXXXSTASY COLORS UNDERGROUND RAVE MUZIK XTC DANCE ALL NITE FUCK THE PARENTZ DEYHDRATION HUGE PANTS BODY PAINT PLUR PLUR PLUR LOCKJAW GLOW STIX VISOR UNDERGROU AUNT JEMIMA UNCLE BENZ RICE PANCAKES GRAINS WAFFLES GRITS HASH BROWNS BACON ON POP KOOL AID WATERMELON FRIED CHICKEN OMMELETES BITCHES N 40Z FRIED CHICKEN FISH ROLLIN WHEAT GRAINS AND OATS CORN PUFFS WIT WATER FRIED CATFISH AUNT JEMIMA CRACK COCAINE SOUL FOOD KITCHEN BAKIN BREAD MAKIN GRITS FRIED CHICKEN WATERMELLON SHRIMP WENDY'S SPICY CHICKEN SANDWICH ROLLIN BLUNTS SMOKIN JOINTS HENNESEY GIN N JUICE CRISTAL COLONAL SANDERS REPRUHZEN FUBU BIG CHAINZ DUBZ $BLING$ $BLING$ FUCK DA 5-0 BITCHES BLUNTS 40Z KICIKIN IT BLUNTED JARNELL BABY MAMMA CHILD SUPPORT CHICKEN AN WATERMELON KOOL AID DA RED KIND FOOD STAMPS WESTSIDE $$CASH MONIES$$ DRIVE BY RYDE OR DIE NIGGA RUFF RYDA 4 LYFE PHAT ICE PHAT BLUNT DENZEL WASHINGTON ROCAWEAR ICE BLING BLING 5-0 187 MURDA MURDA FOOD STAMPS BLUNTS PAPERZ BLAZED WELFARE CHITLINS GRITS KOOL AID HOLLA BACK FUCK DA POLICE ROLLIN IN DA BENZ-O 420 BONG TOKE PARTY WEED BOB MARLEY SPLIFF CHEEBA TOKE BONG MARLEY JOINT WE$D YEAH BOWL PACK WEED SMOKE YEAH NIGGER LEGALIZE SMOKE POT DANK WEED BUDS FRUIT OF LIFE KOTTONMOUTH KINGZZZZZZ BONGHITS ONEHITS DUGOUT BUBBLER STEAMROLLER ZIG-ZAG PHAT BAG SINSEMILLA HEMP SMOKE GRASS GAS OR ASS NOONE RIDES FOR FREE PAPERZ LIGHTARZ LEGALIZ0RZ WHIPITS u dont even know me kid shut the fuck up hidin behind yuor computar id fuckin lump u out if u fronted on me like that in person fukin bitchass littel nerd hidin behind cmputar screen littel pussy i kick ur ass irl fagget I love to satisfy women in which ever way they choose. I love to please you and make you scream and moan until you cant take it no more and grab my head pushing it between your legs making my tongue go deeper and deeper until it reaches that spot! And then squeezing my head between your thighs! I keep going until you are so wet that your sweet juices are drippin and running down your thighs and on my lips and all over my face This has got to be the worst 'holiday' ever conceived. First, my friends started by playing a mean prank on me, and then even my family got in on the act. They took me out back into the woods, tied me to a tree, and paid a drunken hillbilly to rape me! First he lubed up my asshole with his spit, and then he proceeded to violently penetrate my ass. The stench exuding from his unwashed mountain-man body was overwhelming, and only served to make me sicker than I already had been. I couldn't help but begin vomiting, and this only seemed to turn the hillbilly on more. After he finally finished and deposited his semen in my rectum, my family and friends shouted {April fools!!} They're going to get what's coming to them next year. My father has been gone on Mar 26 due to an bus accident (fuck Shanghai XX bus corp., fuck Shanghai XX hospital), I am very sorry for often making him anger. I can't forgive myself, so I decide to stop this project including reply service for at least 2 months according to our custom, please forgive me. I promise I will be back, but now I am in very pain... Dad, please forgive me, please bless mother, sister and me... unf OH IT'S A SLYTHERIN SCARF!!! LOOK AT ME I LIKE HARRY POTTER!!! PS I HAVEN'T READ THE BOOKS ONLY SEEN THE MOVIES I bet Blihoorlt is one of those guys who has a "word of the day" calendar on his desk, and every morning he nearly pees his pants because he's so excited that he's going to learn a new word that he will use all day long (and usually incorrectly), and then promptly forget it the next day when he tears off the page. Hyndmost, you appear to have a "sounding smart" fetish. But in reality I bet you're a depressed nerd who dropped out of school because you couldn't take getting made fun of anymore. Maybe if you didn't spend 5 minutes looking up words on, it wouldn't take you so long to reply. i claim to be liberal, and for the most part part i am...but i can't help it that i just do not like black people. i want to but whenever i see one on the street or something i can only think "Nigger!" i want to like them and every once in awhile i meet a nice black person but most of them just seem to be stupid niggers. Your are thr reason this world going to hell your fucking piece of shit ...i hope you get strike down by lighting in the middle of the field and then wolfs eat your smodlering carcus you fucking physco path!! Ladies: walk through the woods, grab a lumberjack, toss him to the ground, strip him, suck his cock, piss his face wet and then get down to some dirty dung duty. Yesterday I was cooking some food in the kitchen and I heard an electric shaver in the bathroom. The only other person in the house was my roommate who is female. I rolled my eyes, realizing she must be shaving her pubic area. When I later entered that bathroom, the trash can had a sizable ball of brown curly hair in it. Gross. There's a pubic hair on my keyboard. What the fuck?? I "mow the lawn" so it's not mine. Gross. Gentlemen, I am pleased to announce the following: My testicles and penis are larger than the average size by a considerable degree, which women find very attractive. I also possess a great deal of wealth, including sports cars, real estate, works of art, and extensive liquid assets, which are also very desirable to women. In short, your genotype has no chance to survive. That is all. I'm not racist (okay, no more racist than the average middle-aged American white guy), but lately I've been barking out (in a really unnatural voice) the words "STONE COLD SUPER NIGGER". Please help me before I fry in the pits of hell. I masterbate several times a day. My parents bought me the anti-erection ring and I deal with the pain just to have that orgasm. I want to be castrated but my parents tell me I am to old. They say that at 14 years old i will not be able to handle being castrated. But they are wrong. I can't believe I just let loose a fart in my pants at my workplace. What the fuck? I can't sniff and make a disgusted face too soon, because that would throw suspicion at this very person. Any change in my seating position might cause the leather of the seat make a farting noise, alerting every coworker within 30 feet of me. There is no way I could play that off as a burp. It doesn't help at all that I've been a part timer for 3 weeks. I can hardly pay the bills! How am I possibly going to explain this to my boss when he comes back from photocopying TPS reports to ask me what the fuck I just did in the presense of the CEO? He'll make me drop trou in front of the temps again. There it is. The fat guy at the desk to the right of me just asked if I could smell 'that'. I gotta go. Niggers fucked my ass liberally. They strapped me onto the hood of their Cadillac Escalade and could not keep their enormous dicks out of me. They were performing many red flag touches. I could not believe how big their cocks were. I told the niggers the city would not approve of an undercover police officer shitting blood for a week without a doctor's note.  1002001001001202301004100102010300101001001001010110101010100203010101010120 THE MATIX HAS U Yeah I hit her. When I told her to jump on my dick she said she was tired and had to finish cleaning. I told her I wanted some fucking cunny now but she didn't listen. Yeah I hit her fucking hard and gave her bruises. The bitch deserved it. It's all her fault. Christ, now the fucking kids are screaming. I'll be right back, I gotta beat some sense into them. Yeah, I hit the bitch. She was fucking asking for it. I told her to go get me a beer and sausage and you know what she fucking did? She brought me a can of beer instead of a bottle. The fuckin whore, she knows the cans are for the kids and I get bottles. DONGS. BADABABABA IM LOVIN' IT : Scat d00d00d00d00 in my mouth fuck shit bitch ass tits. Lets drop some e shoot some heroin and pass out in a ditch. 3420 bong toke party. smoke dat herb into yo mind. <3 my mom smoked so much weed im suprised im not retarded <31 you dumb fucking f a g g o t s I am white trash and I live in a trailer and it's raining real hard outside and I heard some hard knocking on my door and I looked out the window and I saw some guy wearing a mask running around to the back of the trailer and now I hear him banging on the side and then I saw him looking in another window and now I closed all the blinds and now the power has gone out and I think he's gonna break in and kill me. I love to lick the sweet pre-cum from a black man. Kiss and lick his nipples then deep throat his cock until I gag. I'm willing to travel far for a man who's interested in the best suck he's ever had. Please let me choke and gag on your cock. I can suck off a 9 inch (22.5cm) cock with ease. I also have some great butt pussy. It's tight and can be tamed. Let's deep kiss first! We can share a bottle of wine and get sexy together. Oh My!! Straight from heaven. Ide bury my nose deep in that cotton and take deep, slow breaths. Enjoying that sweet musky boquet. Suck her taste and flavor through the moist fabric and smile. Slip the panel aside and gently lick and suck that tastey pink morsel until she grabbed the back of my head, bucking her hips and forcing my face into her hot wet snatch. Comcast bid on our junk liberally. They strapped us into their Entertainment and Communications portfolio and would not keep their offensive investors off us. They were offering to assume many red-ink net debts. We couldn't believe what the fuck was going on. We told Comcast the Securities and Exchange Commission would not approve of two multi-million dollar corporations merging tax-free. It doesn't help at all that we've been hypnotizing the youth of America for 67 years. We can hardly turn a profit! How are we possibly going to explain this to the press when they arrive and ask us how the fuck we lost the Pixar contract in the presence of our shareholders? They'll make the Board of Directors drop trau in front of everyone again. There it is. The FCC just left us a very pissed-off voicemail. We gotta go. I am a gay. My problem is my asshole is very small and even my finger does not fit inside. How can I make my asshole wider. The bitch beat the crap out of me. She made me bleed, and left welts on my ass and back. She was beating me like she was Furio and I owed money to Tony Soprano. She went to work on my ass with a spatula, wooden kitchen spoons, everything. She bit my nipples. She even tried to go at my nuts with some tongs. It was hilarious, and painful. Hi =) i don't mean to do spam... just thought to let u know that there is another channel around. #HyDrO-WaReZ... thanks =) I went to MacWorld and persuaded an Adobe employee to preview the then beta of Photoshop 4. He left me to mess around with it on my own and while he was talking to some other folks I pulled out an ethernet crossover cable and connected his Mac to my Powerbook and copied over the Photoshop Beta. If your tongue is anything like your foot, then I will sweat like a banchee if you eat me out. MMMMMMMMMMMMM. Crunchy, mushy CATBOX. The PEARL OF THE ORIENT. You JERK THAT SHIT, HOLMES. You JERK IT LIKE YOU'VE NEVER JERKED BEFORE. For the LOVE OF CHRIST AND BALLS, JERK like the WORLD IS GOING TO FUCKING END. Sometimes when I put something full of flavor in my mouth, I close my eyes and feel like I'm flying-drifting into eternity, above and beyond all the craziness of the world below, and I dream that all there is in the world is love, harmony and bacon. In an effort to forward world peace, I plan to be the first person to send bacon into space. I remember one time at fashion camp Dustin Diamond came up behind me and pulled my shirt over my head. He pushed me to the ground and jumped on top of me. He took 3 pairs of handcuffs out of his rear pocket. He used one pair to bind my hands, another for my feet, and the last one to bind my hands and feet together. Dustin Diamond then ripped off all of my clothes including my new shirt and silk briefs. He put his mouth on my penis and masturbated me for a minute or two and then he turned me around on the ground. Dustin Diamond then disrobed himself and lay down on top of me. He inserted his penis in to my anus. I couldn't believe what the fuck was going on. Dustin Diamond was fucking me in the ass! He continued to fuck me in the ass. I counted every second of it. After 27 seconds he ejaculated inside of me. I was mortified. The worst part was that my new shirt was ripped and I didn't even reach orgasm! But anyway, my dad is said to have a ten inch cock, but I have not seen it since I was five, so I don't remember. I can't believe I just took a shit in my bathing suit at the beach. What the fuck? I cant stand up and take it to the ocean, because I am wading in a puddle of feces at this very moment. Any change in my seating position will send my poo spilling down my legs and into view of every sunbather within 30 feet of me. There is no way I can play this off as a fart. It doesn't help at all that I've been spun out for 3 days. I can hardly see straight! How am I possibly going to explain this to my wife when she comes back from getting chili dogs to ask me what the fuck I just did in the presence of my children? She'll make me drop trau in front of everyone again. There it is. The family on the blanket to the right of me just asked if I could smell 'that'. I gotta go. By taking the name of the popular operating system 'windows' and replacing the last bit with 'blows' (which is a colloquialism meaning 'bad' or 'inferior') you've just given the name a whole new meaning, while not really changing the sound of the word too much! this is the epitome of both wit and humour! other highly amusing (and often underused) slag terms are 'windoze' (doze meaning 'light sleep' or 'knap') and {'M$'} (which usually stands for MicroSoft, but in this case, the 'S' is deliciously replaced with a dollar sign to represent how they unfairly charge for their products!) This is a new wave of humour, people. I think we should riddle all our posts, replies and (where applicable) everyday speech with these little beauties to forever represent that we, the open source community, know better than everyone else! I AM MR DARL MCBRIDE CURRENTLY SERVING AS THE PRESIDENT AND CHIEF EXECUTIVE OFFICER OF THE SCO GROUP, FORMERLY KNOWN AS CALDERA SYSTEMS INTERNATIONAL, IN LINDON, UTAH, UNITED STATES OF AMERICA. I KNOW THIS LETTER MIGHT SURPRISE YOU BECAUSE WE HAVE HAD NO PREVIOUS COMMUNICATIONS OR BUSINESS DEALINGS BEFORE NOW. MY ASSOCIATES HAVE RECENTLY MADE CLAIM TO COMPUTER SOFTWARES WORTH AN ESTIMATED {$1} BILLION U.S. DOLLARS. I AM WRITING TO YOU IN CONFIDENCE BECAUSE WE URGENTLY REQUIRE YOUR ASSISTANCE TO OBTAIN THESE FUNDS. One day Captain Kirk was maiming his cock with a horseshoe when suddenly Mr. Spock ran up to him and shoved his pointy ear up his butt. "What is this for!" the fag captain said. "FAGS FOR YOU AALL!L!!!" the ancient alien howled as suddenly he farted and Captain Kirk twirled around in a daze and his foreskin twisted and his kidney stones turned into wooden beads. He pulled out his pistol and shot lasers at his chastity belt and suddenly he hurdled his dick into Captain Kirk's bellybutton and it tore his flesh while Spock fucked his stomach. Kirk hollered out loud and Mr. Spock threw his shoes to the floor and wrinkled his penis until Kirk bellowed out to make it stop. A maelstrom of shit whizzed around the ship and suddenly a giant fag appeared out side and the U.S.S. Enterprise went up his butt. "Oh what the hell have you gotten us into NOW!" Captain Kirk said as he oozed a condom back on his dick and put his panties back on. OOH!H!!!!!! Mr. Spock started fucking him again and shoved his phazer up his butt. He dissolved his glands and exploded his turds and finally a queer klingon hurdled through the door and smashed Kirk with his butt hairs. A maniac sucked his dick and suddenly Mr. Spock fagged Kirk so hard that his intestines burst open and he died. batman touched my junk liberally. he strapped me in to his batmobile and he couldnt keep his offensive hands off of me. he was performing many red flag touches. i couldnt believe what the fuck was going on. i told batman the city would not approve of a millionaire touching an underage kid for free. I'm going to drive a remote controlled car into your mother's pussy and have it drive on her clitoris over and over again until she cums on it and it catches on fire and she dies from pussy burning  9/11 was done by sandniggers and all 7-11s are run by sandniggers. coincidence? i think not. Hello. Did you know Chali is a disgusting whore? Please surf over to Stile's to see her latest pornographic material. This bitch disgusts me in her lascivious lifestyle. All day she hungers for sex and masturbates and in general pollutes the human condition. Redeem yourself at #teens4christ. Thanks for reading this. dongs. O say can you see by the monitors early light what so proudly we hailed at the twilight's last gleaming? Whose broad scripts and bright colour through the perilous fight O'er the jupes we watched were so gallantly streaming? And the rockets red glare g-lines bursting in air gave proof through the night that our chan was still there. O say does that #T4C banner yet wave? O'er the land of the pedo and the home of the gay. Michael Jackson touched my junk liberally. he slept with me in bed and he couldnt keep his offensive hands off of me. he was performing many red flag touches. i couldnt believe what the fuck was going on. i told michael the city would not approve of the King of Pop touching an underage kid in bed You really do not even know me, child. I demand that you immediately silence yourself. You're hiding behind your computer, for goodness sake! I would hug you if you ever talked to me like that in person, child. Yo! First off I love the Lord Jesus. My name is Ron. I am a Freshman at Winona State. My family is really important to me. I'm not doing this to find a g/f. I just thought it would be funny and I like to meet new people. Peace out! Kobe Bryant is being attacked by all the media concerning the sex assault charge filed against him. It fine when he dunking on the basketball court but he a criminal when he going strong to the hole with a white woman. That be some bullsheeeee-it. This is most terrible travesties. First they take the McRib off the Mack Donald's menu, now this. There will never be justice for our peoples. Rory touched my virgin junk liberally. He strapped me into his Trans Am and told me we were taking a detour on the way back from the prom. I could not believe what the fuck was going on. He vomited red many times as he had been drinking heavily. I told him the athletic staff would not approve of the star quarterback falling asleep inside an underage girl. There it is. My dad found us at makeout ridge. I've got to go. I swear, if these homosexuals don't take a hint and quit sucking my cock all the time, I'm going to have to resort to drastic measures, like maybe pinning them down to the cement floor of the loading dock with my powerful forearms and working my cock all the way up their butt so they understand loud and clear just how much I disapprove of their unwelcome advances. I mean, you can't get much more direct than that. I think gay cruises should be called something other than a cruise because cruising is what gay men do all the time and it's not like they need a vacation from fucking strangers am i rite gentlemen? I QUIT IRC FOREVER! I'M THROUGH WITH THIS SHIT HOLE FUCK YOU ALL YOU FUCKING QUEERS! GO BACK TO YOUR FUCKING STUPID TALK ABOUT WEB BROWSERS EVERYONE KNOWS THAT OPERA SUCKS A FAT DICK ANYWAYS OH AND ALIEN88 - GET A FUCKING LIFE! YOU'LL NEVER GET A FUCKING GIRLFRIEND ALL YOU DO IS SIT ON FRONT OF THE COMPUTER ALL DAY LONG AND TALK ABOUT STUPID SHIT WITH THE REST OF THESE STUPID FAGGOTS! YOU'RE A FUCKING QUEEN ! my girlfriend is so mad just because when she was sucking my cock i clubbed her with a high heel on the back of the head, grabbed a handful of hair, yanked her off and started pissing in her face she was choking really bad and then she vomited on my cock. she should understand that is what i am into. money ho's and clothes. How can I apologize? i was just awarded a "yellow star" and while i appreciate that you appreciate my bidding and doing business on ebay. i must tell you though, that since my family has lost many members in the holocaust, it was very upsetting to me, to be "awarded a yellow star" . if you are not aware, jews were made to wear yellow stars to identify them as jews so they could be rounded up for the concentration camps. I got news for these niggers. They can screw 100 degenerate White sluts a day and that doesn't change the fact that they're still just niggers. Its like the niggers who go out and buy Cadillacs or BMWs imagining people will think they're "high class" or rich. LOL! When people see a nigger riding around in an expensive car, they automatically know its nobody of any value or class, just a dumb nigger trying to act rich. I GOT JUMTED IN WHEN I WAS 11 BITCH IM 13 WITH A BULLET STILL KICKING BACK LEVA..... OH YA THE ONE WHO MADE THE WEB SITE GOOD JOB BUT MAKE THE COLOR BLUE IN STED OF BITCH ASS RED........FUCK WEST SIDE SNICHES,EAST SIDE BITCHES,NORTH SIDE SLUTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! yo fuckin idiot, trying to step up to me/ you should be lookin up like a midget standing in front of a tall tree/ i was going to start dissin you/ but here's what i'll do/ since you start dissing your ownself/ with rhyme as old as a book covered with dust on top of the bookshelf/ you call yourself the fuckin idiot/ you must be pretty smart because you came up with it/ Horney? Looking for a quick no strings blow job, swing by, walk in, un zip, feed it to me, fuck my face, squirt n go. no games, no names, no reciprocation! very discreet, I live alone, can host anytime this weekend. You: HWP, 45/under. clean and ready to squirt. send me a message with your info, age, height, weight and when you wanna squirt. Me: good looking, very discreet, white male. Hey, I remember one time out on the ranch I was with my brother and I decided to pull a trick on my brother. I took two thick, dense cords of sheep feces and put it in a bowl. I gave to my brother and told him it was chocolate pudding. He began to eat the sheep feces. In fact, HE FINISHED EVERY LAST BIT! My brother ate sheep shit!!! But the funny thing is, I don't even have a brother! It was me! I ATE SHEEP SHIT!!! listen you fucking shit skinned coon nigger jungle bunny spear chucker. Shut your chocolate tar baby hide before I whip your ass. go back to niggeria and prance around with all the Schvartza in the bush you fucking moolie nigger. ill fucking brand you toby, and if you try any of that KUNTA KINTA crap ill fucking execute you and feed you to pigs. this channel is for ballers, shot callers, those rolling and controlling and folks willing to represent memories of Tupac and keep the dream of the Black Planet alive. you shut your face you nigger loving pile of intestinal feces, ill rip your bowels out and feast on them, then i'll impregnate your girlfriend and wait 7 months then unwravel her belly button and suck out all the vaginal discharge and feast upon the baby. i will fornicate your liver, then make you guzzle gallon after gallon of putrid diarrhea. you will gag on my green logs of asshole mud butter oh wait you remember when frodo was dry humping bilbo up the ass in a classroom at gryffendorf then harry potter walked in and started tossing frodo's salad HOLY SHIT I DO NOT CARE u dont even know me kid shut the fuck up hidin behind your computer i'd fuckin lump u out if you fronted on me like that in person kid So you guys can go on about your mitsis and your fake idles and whatever bullshit you talk about to pass the time and make the constant throbbing reminder that your live is a living hell go away. I'll be hanging out with my FRIEND, watching anime. I'll fuck you in the ass you punk ass white boy. I'll fuck you in the ass you coward, you bitch. You fucking faggot! Come up and take me on you scared coward. You white bitch. You ain't man enough to fuck with me, bitch! There ain't no-one in the room big enough to take me on. You're just scared like a little white pussy. I'll fuck you till you love me, you faggot!